AIBU - using the name Madeline

[Argealanlea]

First pregnancy and DH and I so far can only decide on one name for a girl - Madeline. We love it and it goes really well with our surname.

Issues are:
Madeline McCann. Is it too associated with her to use? We actually live in Ireland not U.K. so there is maybe less of an association but could still be there? For me already saying the name in my head with our surname lessens the connection so maybe it’ll be the same for all our family and friends?

Second issue - Madeline the books/movies which feature a red head Madeline. We actually have a 50% chance of having a red head. Would this be bad then to use the name and risk teasing or am I overthinking it and kids don’t read those books anymore anyway and the movie is old!

Cant decide if we’re being unreasonable to consider it - we both really like it!

Actually having now read more posts it seems I’m wrong about the 99% . A friend called her daughter Madeleine and I heard a lot of people reacting in surprise about the choice (not to her face) which made me doubly glad not to have chosen it. It’s so sad though, it’s a gorgeous name but it’s just tainted for me.

It won't be a big association when she's older, it certainly isn't the first thing I would think of. Also it isn't a big deal even if people do associate it when they first hear it. Madeleine McCann was a little girl, not a mass murderer. You're not calling her Adolf. The association to her isn't repulsive, it's what happened to her, which has nothing to do with her name. She wasn't kidnapped because she was called Madeleine!

I automatically went to this kids show and now have the song stuck in my head again 😂

You could use Maddison instead, love that name

@TrufflesAndToast maybe depends how many people you know called it? I know quite a few Maddies so would think of them. I have given probably less than 5 minutes of thought to Madeleine McCann in my life! But I was quite young when she disappeared.

We have two in the family (different sides) and both your points are none issues, honestly. Agree she will be Maddie / Maddy though, so make sure you are ok with that.

@TrufflesAndToast

I adore the name Maddy but wouldn’t dream of using it because its association with MMC is just far too strong. It’s literally the first thing 99% of people think of when they hear the name.

That's quite some hyperbole. Just read this thread. It literally isn't.

My first thought, when I saw the name, was not the McCanns, but the book, Madeline, by Louis Bemelmans - and I think it is a lovely name!

I loved the name Maddie when I was pregnant but as soon as I mentioned it to my mum she said it immediately made her think of Madeleine McCann and how that would make her feel sad. It then played on my mind too. It’s a lovely name but the fact you have two issues with it already probably is a sign that you should choose another one.

@lottiegarbanzo

M McCann went missing in 2007. You'd have to be an adult now to have any memory of that event.

I think there was a brief hiatus in use of the name, maybe for about five years, then it came back. I've met more than one child with the name.

Maddie Moate on CBBC is a prominent, current Maddie. She's great.

Although Madeleine McCann went missing in 2007 she is still frequently headline news. I’d be very surprised if teenagers had no idea who she was. There’s a Madeleine McCann card in Cards Against Humanity. Literally everyone knows who she is.

In England and Wales, the name Madeleine never recovered from its drop in 2008 and the general tend since then is downward. Though it is still in moderate use.
names.darkgreener.com/#madeleine

As I said earlier, it wouldn’t put me off using the name but as the OP is asking the honest answer is that Madeleine as a name is linked to Madeleine McCann far more than any other missing or murdered child.

My 3yr old cousin is Madeline. (not pronounced like madeleine mcCann) nn is Maddie.
Allot of our family and friends still commented on the ref to Madeleine McCann , despite the pronounciation difference.

Madeleine was one of the few names that DH and I could agree on. Unfortunately, our last name is McCann. Otherwise we absolutely would have used it.

Love it. Unlikely to be shortened to Maddie in Ireland, imo.

I wouldn't automatically think of madeleine mccan personally, but maybe that's because I have a friend named madeleine.

I did think of the lovely film Madeline which is one of my all time favourites from my childhood! However I'm in my mid twenties and none of my friends were familiar with the film when I mentioned the film to them once.

Also, if you're pronouncing it MadeLIEn rather than MadeLIN then I think that lessens the McCann association somewhat.

I know a Madeline in Ireland and no one at all makes that connection (I am Irish)

• SleepingStandingUp

TrufflesAndToast
I adore the name Maddy but wouldn’t dream of using it because its association with MMC is just far too strong. It’s literally the first thing 99% of people think of when they hear the name.
That's quite some hyperbole. Just read this thread. It literally isn't.*

As I very quickly realised in my follow up post

@Soubriquet

I would use it. It will probably be shortened to Maddy and no one has a problem with that

Whatever name you choose make sure you're comfortable with the abbreviations, nicknames etc associated with it, it really doesn't matter of you say 'I don't want it shortened or nicknames used', it will be once the child is away from you!

My brother and I used to get up early on a Sunday to watch Madeline! We absolutely loved it. I also love red hair. I can’t imagine that many would make the connection now, it’s pretty dated.

However, I agree with another poster. I’d be far too superstitious to use the name and I think people would think of Madeleine McCann unfortunately. It was/is such a huge case.

YANBU to use it unless your surname is McCann. It's a lovely name, though I prefer Madeleine as a spelling.

It reminds me more of the Madeleine cartoons or the cakes. All positive associations!

The cartoons were shown on Tiny Pop ten years ago, so it's not that dated.

Youre overthinking it

@HeyGirlHeyBoy

Love it. Unlikely to be shortened to Maddie in Ireland, imo.

Why do you think it would be unlikely to be shortened to Maddie in Ireland? I don't know any real life Madeline's but Irish people shorten names too

It's a lovely name and never thought of connection until you mentioned.

Everyone has a name they don't like for some reason that they associate with a person they know .

Madeleine here, so very much qualified to comment on my name

I was born in 1975 and only met one other Madeleine until I was 30. Now my daughter's best friend is a Madeleine (post-McCann) and my neighbour's daughter is a Madeleine (just pre-McCann) and occasionally I hear others calling their little daughters by the name when I'm out and about.

I wouldn't worry about the McCann link, no-one has ever mentioned it to me in connection with my name, possibly because I'm older, but I gather from the parents of the younger ones that it doesn't really come up.

Re: pronunciation, my parents always intended me to be Mad-elaine. We lived in France for a while when I was a child and everybody I knew there pronounced it as an odd mix of Mad-elaine and Mad-e-lin. Historically in Britain it was pronounced Mad-elaine, the Mad-e-lin is a more recent style and more Americanised (yes, I have done lots of research on my name through history and culture )

I'm also known as Maddy, and Mads. It should really have been Maddie give that it contains an I and and E and no Y, but my mother's name has a Y and she wanted it to be like hers, so it's always been that way.

I never disliked it as a child but now as an adult I love it. It's different but not unheard of, and classically French. Go for it OP. Call her Madeleine and she's bound to be delightful

It’s a beautiful name - really elegant and classy.

I really don’t think it’s irretrievably associated with Madeleine McCann. But even if it is, it’s not like she was a bad person who did anything wrong, or she was kidnapped because she was named Madeleine.

If you’re not happy with Madeleine how about Evelyn? (Just suggesting it because I think it’s an equally beautiful name and it sounds a bit similar!)