AIBU - using the name Madeline

[Argealanlea]

First pregnancy and DH and I so far can only decide on one name for a girl - Madeline. We love it and it goes really well with our surname.

Issues are:
Madeline McCann. Is it too associated with her to use? We actually live in Ireland not U.K. so there is maybe less of an association but could still be there? For me already saying the name in my head with our surname lessens the connection so maybe it’ll be the same for all our family and friends?

Second issue - Madeline the books/movies which feature a red head Madeline. We actually have a 50% chance of having a red head. Would this be bad then to use the name and risk teasing or am I overthinking it and kids don’t read those books anymore anyway and the movie is old!

Cant decide if we’re being unreasonable to consider it - we both really like it!

[TulipsTwoLips]

Beautiful name. I taught a Madeleine for a year and never once made the connection.

[Georgeskitchen]

It's fine. With the passage of time, by the time she gets to school, it's doubtful her friends will make any connection, or even care, that she has the same name as a child who vanished into thin air.
Slightly off topic but there's probably plenty of boys/men called Peter who aren't associated with the Yorkshire Ripper, plenty of kids called Rose/Fred etc etc......

[PragmaticWench]

Sorry Madeleine is Mad-e-lane

Madelin is Mad-e-lynn

Madeline is Mad-e-line

[Vallmo47]

I disagree with a few replies saying you are overthinking this because I saw the thread title and immediately thought McCann.
So I don’t think you are overthinking it but I also think it’s about time we stopped associating it with that tragedy. Our kids growing up won’t know so let’s change the association! :)

[OfstedOffred]

I wouldnt have jumped to it. For all the names out there are probably lots where there's some sad association or other, I think few people dwell on that at all. I've got two colleagues call Madeleine and know a child of 6 with that name two so that's what would come to my mind before Madeleine McCann.

[LaBellina]

My first name in real life is based on my grandfather’s name. He died at a young age after a disease killed him. He was named after his uncle who also died at a young age, under quite mysterious circumstances. God knows how the relatives that had this name before them met their end (and actually I don’t want to know). I dislike my jinxed name very much because it’s directly linked to my family history (and can’t understand for the love of God WHY my mother choose it knowing full well about what happened to the two previous people that had it) but I wouldn’t have a problem with it if it were linked to a (high profile) missing stranger. Sadly, if you think about it, very likely nearly every name in the world will at least once have been linked to a child that met a terrible faith but not all of the cases are as a famous as the McCann case.

[XelaM]

It won't be associated with McCann forever. As time passes, people will forget about it. However, I'm extremely superstitious, so I wouldn't use the name simply for that reason alone.

[blubberyboo]

Just use the name if you love it. I know double digits worth of Bens ,Jessicas, Hollys and Jamie’s and they are all associated with tragedys in living memory.
There will be Madelines/ Madeleines born prior to 2007 who carry the name and many born afterwards

With the passage of time the name will become less associated with the tragedy particularly if more people like yourself use it.

[PattyPan]

Madeline I’d pronounce mad-a-line, like in the books
Madeleine I’d pronounce mad-a-len or -lin

[Andacherryonthetop]

My friend called her baby madeleine (said like Madelyn) 6 years ago. No one batter an eyelid. It’s a lovely name and maddie is a really cute nickname. I would use it and not worry

[Bitezbabe]

Love the name. She will probably get called Maddie or Mads.

[rainbowandglitter]

I automatically thought of the Mccanns. Madeliene or however you're going to spell it isn't a very common name so i still associate it to the Mccanns. Ben, Holly and Jessica are quite common names so don't make me think of those children.
Not sure children would make the association though.

[Argealanlea]

Thanks everyone! I really appreciate all the responses! I just said it to DH as I liked it thinking he would veto straight away but it’s the first name he’s really keen on so good to know we wouldn’t be unreasonable to use it!

So for mad e lynn it’s Madeleine not Madeline - which has also been useful to know! The softer lynn sounds nicer with our surname.

[yellowsmileyface]

I didn't even know why you were posting this in AIBU until I read the post, so my mind didn't make either association.

It's a beautiful name. I say go for it!

[Argealanlea]

@rainbowandglitter yes I think that’s a valid point. It isn’t that common so stronger links.

[nurserypolitics]

In all honesty, I would say its more rather than less likely to be associated with Madeleine McCann in Ireland because the name Madeleine is/was less widely used than in the UK anyway. That being said, I actually know two Madeleines (one Irish, one English) who would be early/late thirties, and I think people may think it first, then not again. I know a few babies with names that have made me go 'Really?' the first time I heard them then a few months later the name is just a shortcut for that particular child.

And it is a beautiful name. So I wouldn't worry if you love it. I will say the English Madeleine I know had a number of instances of people accidentally calling her McCann without knowing they were doing it, her surname begins with an M though and it was people in doctors waiting rooms/banks/ that level of engagement.

In the event there is a trial of the man suspected of taking her, it would be all over the news again - but aside from anything else, she was a beautiful loved three year old child with a lovely name. I hate the idea her name is seen as unusable as if it were Adolf or Myra and associated with wrong-doing. I think if you love it, go for it.

[CanofCant]

@rainbowandglitter

I automatically thought of the Mccanns. Madeliene or however you're going to spell it isn't a very common name so i still associate it to the Mccanns. Ben, Holly and Jessica are quite common names so don't make me think of those children.
Not sure children would make the association though.

It's very common/popular where I live so I guess it just depends on where you are in the world.

[trumpisagit]

My issue with the name is the popular nickname Maddy.
If you are OK with that then go for it.

[BiscuitLover3678]

There is a big connection for me but that’s because that’s our generation. It will be less of a big deal for your daughter’s generation. It is a lovely name.

The redhead Madeline is adorable I wouldn’t worry about that connection and it’s a good one anyway.

[RavenclawDiadem]

I think it’s a lovely name.

My oldest child is the same age as Madeleine McCann and it was a popular name in that age group. I know she had at least 2 Madeleines or Maddies in her year at school so for me the association is more with them than the missing child.

[PragmaticWench]

Madeleine is pronounced Mad-e-lane, it's French.

Mad-e-lynn is a way some people say it but it's not how Madeleine is supposed to be said.

[teateaandcoffee]

I didn't make the association until reading your post and I am in my late 30s, so I'm sure younger people and children her age will less likely to make the link if that helps.

[Classica]

@PragmaticWench

Madeleine is pronounced Mad-e-lane, it's French.

Mad-e-lynn is a way some people say it but it's not how Madeleine is supposed to be said.

The horse has long since bolted on that one. Most people in the UK will pronounce Madeleine as madda-lynn.

[VestaTilley]

Not unreasonable at all - you should use it if you like it.

It’s my Aunt’s name and I love it.

[FridayiminlovewithRobertSmith]

YABU I would never ever have made the association. I know adults and children with the name.