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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Desk taken at work while on maternity

459 replies

Flopsy145 · 25/01/2022 04:23

I'm coming to the end of my maternity leave and have found out that a man in my team has moved into my desk while I've been off and replaced it with a standing desk. I love my desk, it has a window and privacy which I need more than him in the role I'm in, and I can see my daughter's nursery.
He's on more money than me, and didn't even ask to have my desk, which still has a locked cupboard of mine next to it which I need.
The desk I've been moved to is pretty shit.
AIBU to demand my desk back?

OP posts:
Simonjt · 25/01/2022 15:01

@MonicaGellerCleans

Those of you saying 'well he wouldn't have just rocked up with a new desk and decided himself to move', I honestly would not be surprised if he did! Men get away with so much more than women in the workplace. I've worked in places where men would just get away with doing that and female workers would just be expected to accept it
So you’ve worked somewhere that a man has moved the office desks around and re-assigned all the phone points for the moved desks. At what time of the day did this occur, it would be a fair few hours of work. Thats before you consider him actually sourcing the desk and getting it into the office.
godmum56 · 25/01/2022 15:14

[quote worriedatthemoment]@godmum56 maybe they google in work time ?
Like you say unless they do payroll or personnel etc many things can be shared with colleagues etc the OP hasn't came back to clarify why and also if he can see her screen and the desks are all together in a room there is no confidentiality, unless you have a separate office , if open planned you can hear all the calls happening in general [/quote]
well I am not going to disagree with you......

godmum56 · 25/01/2022 15:27

just a thought.....those of you of whatever gender who have back pain......would you give up a stand up desk and a window...oh plus a view of the OP screens.....to be pain free?

Simonjt · 25/01/2022 15:30

@HelloFrostyMorning

That's horrible. For anything to be altered/moved/taken away when a woman is on maternity leave is so insulting and disrespectful. It feels like they're trying to phase you out.

YANBU @Flopsy145

I was on adoption leave for over a year, I didn’t expect my desk to be left like some sort of shrine, it would be selfish to expect it to be preserved for my sole use. When I returned I had a different desk, in a different room, nothing insulting, or disrespectful, not phasing someone out either. I went back, got back to my job and worked hard, I didn’t stomp my feet and act like a little prince.
2DogsOnMySofa · 25/01/2022 15:47

That's horrible. For anything to be altered/moved/taken away when a woman is on maternity leave is so insulting and disrespectful. It feels like they're trying to phase you out

What absolute tosh! You can't leave a desk empty for maternity leave. You do realise that most jobs are covered whilst on mat leave, and that person or department will have to use the space. It's not like she's just gone off on holiday for a week. Her desk and equipment needed to do the job is still there, just in a different location.

As for phasing the op out! How on Earth do you get that from the posts. They've moved her seating area not changed the job role, reduced her pay and planned an exit strategy

ChristmasPlanning · 25/01/2022 16:53

@Flopsy145

Either that or I'll arrange for an office reshuffle to better make use of the space and change the layout so we all have private desks Smile this is something that has been spoken about in the past anyway.
You're going to arrange a reshuffle of multiple desks so you can sit next to a window? Hmm

What happens when others are unhappy? Are they then going to organise a reshuffle? Surely you all have work to do instead of moving desks about?

TrashyPanda · 25/01/2022 17:44

It’s all about the window seat, isn’t it?

I once had a colleague who threw a hissy fit when an office move meant I got a window seat and she didn’t. It was quite hilarious, especially as I was leaving in a few weeks.

IMO public sector moves are not just done by a couple of staff shoving desks around. IT have to get involved for the phones and computers, facilities management for actually moving the desks etc. it’s expensive, and not just done in a whim.

I wonder if the LM approved this move? Maybe she thought it was time someone else got the window seat?

ClariceQuiff · 25/01/2022 18:17

Just as an aside, where I work if you took a year's leave there'd be at least three 'restructures' while you were off, so you'd be lucky to find yourself in the same building when you got back, let alone the same desk.

RachelGreeneGreep · 25/01/2022 18:32

IMO public sector moves are not just done by a couple of staff shoving desks around. IT have to get involved for the phones and computers, facilities management for actually moving the desks etc. it’s expensive, and not just done in a whim.

I'm not in the public sector but this was exactly what I thought of, when the OP said she would arrange a reshuffle. It's not a job to be taken on lightly, cost factor etc.

LondonQueen · 25/01/2022 18:53

Next thread...
CF at work stole my parking space, is this discrimination?

DGRossetti · 25/01/2022 18:57

@LondonQueen

Next thread... CF at work stole my parking space, is this discrimination?
Depends on if the space was provided for accessibility reasons, really.

Not enough information to go on.

SeasonFinale · 25/01/2022 19:19

It would be such a duck move to try to claim this as some sort of maternity discrimination and rather belittles real cases.

Absolutely nothing wrong with asking your boss to enquire whether your desk can be moved back to it's original position in time for your return citing that where you are to be positioned loses the confidentiality aspect. But also if they say no accept it as one of those things. Many people are returning from wfh to different locations, hot desks etc.

girlmom21 · 25/01/2022 19:59

It would be such a duck move to try to claim this as some sort of maternity discrimination and rather belittles real cases.

It would be quackers.

123feraverto · 25/01/2022 20:10

I wouldn't want someone standing at their desk looking over me while I'm trying to work - I think that's a good enough reason to switch around
It's a distraction-

EmmaGrundyForPM · 25/01/2022 21:21

@AnakinthePadawhine

There are First World Problems, and then there are Public Sector Problems....
I'm public sector and haven't had my own desk for years, nor has anyone else I know in local government. In my experience, the only people I know who work in offices with some sort of desk hierarchy are in the private sector.
godmum56 · 25/01/2022 21:36

@123feraverto

I wouldn't want someone standing at their desk looking over me while I'm trying to work - I think that's a good enough reason to switch around It's a distraction-
i read stuff like this and I am sooooooo glad I am no longer a manager
TikTokCat · 25/01/2022 21:50

Time will have moved on a lot in the last 6 to 12 months. New staff, different responsibilities. You can't expect everything to be the same, including your seating arrangement. Your actual job yes, but not everything.

I would be very irritated if you came to me asking to change your desk on the first day. Why don't you give it 2 weeks and see how it goes. If things arent working then talk to your new colleague and see if you can agree to move between you.

Why do you know this guys salary? I don't feel it is appropriate that this was raised in your original 'case'. As an EA you need to be completely discrete.

Roominmyhouse · 25/01/2022 22:15

@123feraverto

I wouldn't want someone standing at their desk looking over me while I'm trying to work - I think that's a good enough reason to switch around It's a distraction-
They aren’t standing looking at you though, they are standing and working. And they are doing it for a valid health reason. I had a vari desk when I was in the office full time and when I was standing I wasn’t looking at other peoples screens I was looking at my own.

This thread is bonkers. Sorry but you have no right to a specific desk in the office. Even if you have your own desk and don’t hot desk, you sit in the desk you are allocated. If you’ve been off for whatever reason and your desk has been moved that’s just tough. Trying to make out it’s some sort of discrimination is a joke. And telling him to move is just embarrassing. Just go back to work and sit where you have your new desk like an adult.

PrincessNutella · 26/01/2022 00:47

I understand why the OP wants to sit near the window. Everybody wants to sit near the window. That's not a right. If you are going to go on leave for a year, it's unreasonable to expect that people are going to leave a coveted spot empty because you want it. It's not greedy for someone else to take it when you're gone. There's no reason for it to go to waste. And if you wouldn't give it up just to please someone else, don't expect them to do it for you.

JacquelineCarlyle · 26/01/2022 00:56

@Foolsrule

So many nasty comments on this thread Hmm Presumably if the OP’s replacement has stayed until she returned, this wouldn’t have happened. Her desk would have very much still been her desk. Mr Standing Desk has spotted an opportunity and annexed her space as his own. Time for the OP to return to her job and desk as though nothing has happened. As with the example above where things went badly, don’t even entertain anything other than your desk being your desk. Straight back in, first day, bits and bobs out, crack on. If Mr Standing Desk creates a fuss, let him, and remind him that he had no right to invade your territory in the first place.
Absolutely agree with this.
JacquelineCarlyle · 26/01/2022 00:57

@Febs21

This thread is bizarre. An OP posts in quite reasonable terms about something that's bothering her about return to work and gets a load of aggressive responses from people telling her she's lucky to have a job having had a baby during a pandemic, probably going to be made redundant, mocking her job as an EA, telling her she's unhinged etc... Really odd backlash because people seemingly don't understand that not all offices have a hot desking culture. And no I am not public sector (city law firm - own desks and this would never happen while someone was on mat leave).
Also completely agree with this!
Imtryingveryhard · 26/01/2022 01:20

I once worked in an office as part of an agile team seconded to a clients office. One lone employee of the client was also in the same area as us (it had been vacant before we arrived so literally nothing in it) and complained about us using the shredder and ‘her’ bin. Omg, senior management actually called a meeting as the secretary was so upset about us using her personal (ie work provided) items. And they were being serious. Biggest waste of time ever. People can get very petty when they feel threatened an office environment and use things like this to score points. I don’t give two hoots where I sit but given I now work at home I can sit where I like, use what bin I like and avoid these crazy office politics.

PorridgeLove · 26/01/2022 02:38

Something like that happened to me too. When I mentioned "my cube", the office manager said that "first of all, it is not YOUR cube". Well, in the end I moved back into "the cube formerly and now again assigned to me." And then, well COVID. I think it is important to explain in factual language why you prefer you desk over the one that you were assigned upon your return.

BABAHOTEL · 26/01/2022 03:14

@DolphinFC

Is it your desk or the companies?
Exactly!
BABAHOTEL · 26/01/2022 03:19

What's the relevance of him earning more money than you?

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