Nicknames as names

[ChasingAdhdBrain]

My mom comes from a culture where we sometimes have more than 1-2 first/middles names, and sometimes take mother's maiden name as an additional surname. Not everyone but it wouldn't be considered weird to do so. And then we have nicknames. We loooove a nickname, sometimes the sillier the better. For example I have an Aunt called Baby, my nickname is the word for a small piece of corn (I was v petite growing up), you get the idea 😆

Lately though a number of my friends and family based in Ireland and UK have named their kids what I thought were nicknames.

Trying not to be outing, but let's say things like Jimmy instead of James, Bobby instead of Robert. Aibu to think people should have the option to have a more 'formal' version of their name?

I feel like a huge hypocrite because my mom's family are all about our crazy nicknames. But we also have 'normal' names for formal occasions.

And I realise I'm about to anger all the parents on this site who have named their child a cute nickname 😆

But aibu??

I hate nicknames as names but it seems to be becoming more popular. I particularly dislike Liam as it is actually short for William but that seems to have got lost in the mists of time

It's not something to get outraged about but I think it's nice to have the choice, to shorten or not to shorten; and to choose which of several nicknames you want if there are several options.

I have an Alex who is just Alex. I hated the idea of him being called xander but love Alex, so I just called him what he would always be called.

Contrary to that I have a Bernadette which I refuse to shorten. Her name is beautiful but Bernie is awful and dette sounds like debt.

I think over time names evolve and change (like language in general). Babies are named Sam instead of Samuel, Fred instead of Frederick etc. Jack came from John after all and that isn’t seen as a nickname now but a name of its own. I don’t think it’s that big a deal personally, if you’re going to go by that name the I don’t think you need to a have the ‘formal’ version of that just for the record’s sake.

I have called my child a nick name but I thought if they want to use the formal name
When they are older they can. It’s exactly the same as if they chose to go by the nicer version.

The reason I did it if there was other children with the name in school he was called his name and not the formal version.

Good point on evolution of language @Sparklesocks!

Aw I love the name Bernadette @HerRoyalHappiness - though I must confess I love Bernie as a nickname as well (the name of a good friend, maybe that's why I like it).

My brother and I both have 'proper' names that have been shortened to nicknames and we have both changed our names to reflect our respective nicknames as we prefer them (and people often guessed incorrect at my full name which was infuriating).

I hated having to have a name that I don't consider 'mine' read out at my wedding, and it was a pain having to tell every healthcare professional I encounter that I will probably forget to answer to the 'official' name in my notes because I simply don't associate it with me, hence the change.

Anyone has the option to be known by any name they like - giving them a 'formal' name doesn't change that.

@Davros

I hate nicknames as names but it seems to be becoming more popular. I particularly dislike Liam as it is actually short for William but that seems to have got lost in the mists of time

Umm... Liam is an Irish name.

My friends DS has a nickname for a name and when he was enrolling in high school (so 11/12) he asked her " who is formal name ?". He actually didn't realise what his legal name was which blows my mind!

MilduraS I know, my uncle Liam from Kilkenny was actually called William. It is an Irish nickname for William

Are you Spanish heritage, perchance, as we definitely love our silly nicknames?!

What's your AIBU? Are you unsure if you allowed your own taste in names? Nicknames as full name shave been a trend for years. You don't have to like the trend (personally it's not a favourite of mine) but that's just a matter of taste, not that the names are objectively bad.

Are there any other rules that names 'should' be that you'd like to let us know. Would a name like Harry or Jack be allowed as full name, or would it have to be Henry and John?

My only name (other than surname) is a nickname, while my mum liked the full version she preferred one of the nicknames but hated the others and was concerned I might get lumped with one of the others at school. I actually like it just as it is, I would like a middle name (parents couldn't agree and tbh I actually hate those options anyway) but I don't feel I miss out because I don't have the full version.

My pet peeve though is people who say the longer version rather than the name I introduce myself as. They just assume it's the longer name, there's actually 2 possibilities of a longer name (think Jules for Juliet/Julia) and both irritates me when I've told them my name.

@Davros

I hate nicknames as names but it seems to be becoming more popular. I particularly dislike Liam as it is actually short for William but that seems to have got lost in the mists of time

I actually came on here to say that I had never cottoned on that Liam was actually a shortened version of William until I read it on Mumsnet about a year ago. I have a friend who was Christened Mandy, because apparently her mum said it would get shortened to that anyway. I knows loads of Jamies , but that seems acceptable these days. Was Emma originally Emily or Anne originally Anabelle? Names evolve over the years, do we really need them to be formal?

A names a name. I find it silly to give a formal name with the intention of never actually calling them that. Who needs a 'formal' name now?

My youngest is Alfie so yeah a nickname. My older two are full names but everyone calls them by nicknames

I prefer a full given name which can be shortened if the owner of the name wishes. One of my DS uses his full name at work and when writing but is known by friends and family by the shorter version.

However I thought you were referring to people giving their DC truly stupid names. Primarily media persons. I once met a woman who seemed fairly sensible who had a child named Beans. Poor kid.

Each to their own but I think it's nice for the named person to have a choice as they grow up. I have quite a funny nickname that is used a lot but I really like my full name too and like having the option to use either

My husband wanted our son to have a shortened name, I said it had to be the full name and that is all I call him. DH's family call him the shortened name and he doesn't like it.
I don't think it matters too much. There are kids out there called bear and dutchess, each to their own.

@Davros

Each to their own but I think it's nice for the named person to have a choice as they grow up. I have quite a funny nickname that is used a lot but I really like my full name too and like having the option to use either

Lots of names don't have intuitive nicknames though. Felix, Jude, River, Hugo, Astrid, Iris, Freya, Hannah... They all cope fine either with their name or if they hate it enough they can change it.

There's also nothing to say that someone with a nickname can't use they full name if they prefer it. In that way Charlie is potentially more flexible than Noah.

I don’t understand why shortened versions of a name are referred to as nicknames on here.

It’s not how I thought nicknames worked, for example many years ago I used to work with a chap called Alan Bell, his nickname was Dinger. One of my brothers skittles team always wore a shirt with a wide tie for matches and he was always referred to as Kipper. I have obviously been misunderstanding what a nickname is for the last half century.

I grew up hearing all my grandmother’s generation using their nicknames always. My grandmother was born in the first decade of the 20th C.
Names like:
Fonsie
Dixie
Maisie
Lily
Nancy
Nan
Lala
Bobby
Flossie
Peggy
Jack
Billy
That’s just a random selection. They all had “real” names too.

A couple on that list are now the “real” names (birth cert names) of DC two generations down.

Sorry 3 generations down! My DC’s generation.

Yanbu.

I would give a full formal name, then choose a nickname over time. DadErica went by an informal name from his allofather. I was eight before I knew his formal name, but my mother and his mother always used his chosen name.