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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Fed up of running around like a blue-arsed fly!!

46 replies

sunshinelover69 · 19/01/2022 10:21

Genuinely don't know if I'm being unreasonable here as I haven't had Covid and I don't know how it feels. Husband is on day 10 of Covid, think it's Omicron - flu-like symptoms. I know he feels crap and it's utterly rubbish. Have been running around after him getting drinks/food/keeping the house clean and tidy/doing the washing etc etc whilst working full time (from home) in a busy job. I started from a base that he would not be doing anything to help out. But on day 10 it's starting to get to me as I'm bloody knackered and feel like checking into a hotel and leaving him to it! When I ask him if he's up to doing something minor (eg emptying dishwasher) he will put on his poorly face and do it but I can see he's not happy. Am I being mean or is he doing the whole man flu thing and milking it? He's not bedridden , but he's been sleeping til late morning. Don't begrudge him getting better obviously but Jesus Christ I need a bloody break! I can't help thinking that if it was me with Covid I'd still have to crack on and keep the house running. Happy to be told I'm being a bitch if that's the case...

OP posts:
pinkyredrose · 19/01/2022 10:23

10 days? He's milking it. What's he like when you're ill?

Lavender24 · 19/01/2022 10:27

He's being pathetic. We all had it over Christmas and I still had to do housework and look after my child/pets. I know it affects everyone differently but I only had one night with very high fever where I couldn't do anything and stayed in bed but after that it was just like a usual crappy cold for about a week. I felt shit but I still had to get on with stuff. You are not being a bitch.

GiantHaystacks2021 · 19/01/2022 10:27

Is he wearing the Dressing Gown of Doom?

Bet he has a fine appetite and is happily gaming/ watching sport/ online etc.

Also - he sounds like a right knickers.

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 19/01/2022 10:27

You now only have to self-isolate for 5 days; so 10 days is definitely milking it unless he's genuinely ill.

How often does he do LF or PCR tests?

Original poster
sunshinelover69 · 19/01/2022 10:30

PJ's of doom. There was a glimmer of hope yesterday when he got dressed in actual clothes but the PJs were soon donned again. LFT yesterday - still testing positive. Not to drip feed but he is immuno-surpressed, but I honestly don't think he's seriously ill with it.

OP posts:
Original poster
sunshinelover69 · 19/01/2022 10:30

Plus the 5 day thing is only if you're testing negative - don't think many people are aware of that.

OP posts:
GiantHaystacks2021 · 19/01/2022 10:31

Is he eating?
If he is, then he can't be in that bad health.

Does he enjoy ill-health generally?

TimmyNook · 19/01/2022 10:32

Just stop doing it all. Do the bare minimum. Dishwasher can empty itself throughout the course of being used throughout the day etc.

Original poster
sunshinelover69 · 19/01/2022 10:32

Yeah he's eating. He's really not usually like this but I think he's just leaned into having a bit of a break. Which is fine....but I need a break now!!

OP posts:
mewkins · 19/01/2022 10:33

Regardless of whether he is still testing positive he is now free to go out. Is he back at work?

mumto2unicorns · 19/01/2022 10:34

I'm currently on day 4 and just feels like a cold. Still working full time (from home) and doing cooking and housework. Only thing I've got out of is school pick ups as I'm not allowed out

romany4 · 19/01/2022 10:34

I don't know if he's milking it but I'm currently on day 5 and feeling terrible still.
DH is looking after me.
However we don't have any small children in the house.

Original poster
sunshinelover69 · 19/01/2022 10:35

He's still off work - technically not out of isolation til tomorrow. First day of symptoms was last Monday. Didn't get a positive lateral flow (and then PCR) til last Thursday. Test & trace have told him to isolate until the end of tomorrow unless he gets two negative tests to release early.

OP posts:
Chely · 19/01/2022 10:36

I had covid last month, our baby had it too. I still did all the housework despite feeling crappy, I did have 2 weeks off the gym though (home set up). My dh is useless when ill too.

Squiblet · 19/01/2022 10:38

Can sympathise ... my entire household came down with Covid before I did, so there was a long period of me doing absolutely everything and looking after everyone.

The illness takes everyone differently and your DH may be genuinely exhausted. (I don't know why everyone's assuming here that he's milking it; lots of people I know, men and women alike, needed a couple of weeks or even more before they started regaining their energy post-covid.)

When it happened to me, I let a lot of stuff slide (house cleanliness, life admin, etc), and just caught up gradually afterwards when it suited me. DP did step up eventually once he was feeling up to it.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 19/01/2022 11:00

Milking it like a cow!

He needs to start pitching in again, and definitely not expecting to you to look after him.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 19/01/2022 11:03

I mean he might not feel brilliant, but we all have to get on with it, don’t we?

Mandofan · 19/01/2022 11:04

I think those saying he’s milking it are being unfair. A few of my friends have had it and they’ve been wiped out. He should be able to help with small things like the dishwasher though as he’d have no choice if he lived alone

CharlotteGoldenblattYork · 19/01/2022 11:07

I had a positive test last night and am on my second day in bed. I haven't felt this ill in a long time. Hopefully I won't be like this for 10 days!

TheFoundation · 19/01/2022 11:07

Is he literally just lying there the whole time? And is that different from how he normally spends his days?

BigSandyBalls2015 · 19/01/2022 11:09

Do you have kids? If not and he's mostly in bed then surely there's not much housework to do? Do simple meals/get a takeaway.

Fraine · 19/01/2022 11:37

Dh and I have just had terrible cases of Covid and by the 7th say were much better.

At day 10, if he can get up and do chores then he's fine.

He's milking it, OP.

Original poster
sunshinelover69 · 19/01/2022 11:53

Right thanks everyone. I've told him (nicely) that I can't carry on doing everything and he needs to pull his bloody finger out.

No kids at home at the minute, just the two of us here. Which is adding to the problem if I'm honest as I'm going stir crazy. Even though I know I can go out I haven't been out much. Maybe that's where I went wrong!

OP posts:
Bigfathairyones · 19/01/2022 12:00

Hmm. I'm on the fence. Currently in bed with COVID (day 3) and have a temp, cough and feel pretty flipping crappy. Have got nowhere near working from home/housework (with gloves I hope!) I also deal with COVID results at work and see a huge variation in the effects it has on people. No rhyme or reason to the differences as all vaccinated, but huge age range etc and even then, no particular theme.

mewkins · 19/01/2022 14:22

@sunshinelover69

Right thanks everyone. I've told him (nicely) that I can't carry on doing everything and he needs to pull his bloody finger out.

No kids at home at the minute, just the two of us here. Which is adding to the problem if I'm honest as I'm going stir crazy. Even though I know I can go out I haven't been out much. Maybe that's where I went wrong!

I've had a household of covid for the last week or so and I have been going on two hour dog walks and stopping for coffee Grin I have been told I'm a rubbish nurse but to be honest no one has really been ill.