I Don’t Get Baby Sensory

[SlyAvocado]

And I’m not sure my baby does either

We spent twenty minutes thanking the sun for shining on us and the corn for feeding us, and everyone else seemed to know all the sign language.

I don’t actually like corn so I didn’t particularly want to thank it, but the other mums seemed to really be appreciative of the corn and the other things in the song. The only sign I got to grips with was waving.

My baby didn’t give a toss anyway and spent most of the class staring at a bottle of hand sanitiser.

Then we waved some scarves over our baby’s faces, while the instructor danced around blowing bubbles to ‘Morning Has Broken’

My morning was broken at 4am anyway by my crap sleeper of a baby, 10am is practically afternoon for us.

I am new to the area so I tried to be jolly and talk to the other mums but they weren’t interested, I don’t know if it’s because I didn’t thank the corn.

I wore my Tears For Fears t-shirt with a sequinned blazer which might have been an odd choice but I thought, sequins are sensory aren’t they? The instructor asked if I was off to an 80’s party and I said no, I’m on my way back from one.

We will finish the course because I paid £65, so it’ll be like that time I got drunk and signed up to Zumba classes and made myself keep going even though I hated every minute of it and was rubbish and was asked to stand at the back by the fire exit.

Is there something I’m missing, are all baby sensory classes like that? Do I need to learn all the sign language?

I’m not overly bothered from a friendship point of view because we go to a music class too in a different area which is held in a pub and the parents are really friendly at that one. The baby also loves to shake a maraca like Bez, so I think he prefers it too.

I actually remember being a baby. The thing I liked best was being held by my mother and looking at her face as she talked quietly to me, or sang - she was Welsh.

The thing that frightened me the most was my older sister (18 months older) who had a big gob and shoved things in my face.

I always wondered what these sensory sessions for little ones were for, they didn't exist when my two children were babies or toddlers. They observed all these kind of things at home,with me everyday, inside,and outside of the house.

DD and I did baby sensory. The NCT groups went and didn't talk to anyone but I didn't mind as got the most amazing photos of DD as loved the themes. It got us out at the beginning but it's no benefit to baby or mum apart from a social bit for the mum.

I do also go to a church baby play in a hall. It’s 60p for all the tea and biscuits you want, and as the lovely lady running it also told me, it’s still 60p however many family members you bring

I don’t have any nearby to bring but I did quite enjoy it, because it was nice to see the baby on another bit of carpet, and they had maracas.

This thread has been v entertaining and looking back now with teenage DC, it puts me in mind of months on end of driving 20 miles to take them to Jo Jingles!! I agree that the motivation was primarily to get out of the house and meet other mums, but this never worked for me as I was not a "yummy mummy" and therefore never welcomed into the fold. With two under two, I felt proud just to get there, so didn't quite fit the effortlessly stylish shiny haired and fresh faced bill. TBH I spent more time chatting to the leader than any of the other mums.

I have nothing but admiration for all of you who have had babies and toddlers during lockdown.

As an aside my DC have absolutely zero memory of Jo bloody Jingles, or any other activities that I persuaded myself to enrol them in. Even more upsetting to me is that DD has forgotten Roly Mo, who was her constant companion during her toddler years and whose theme song I can still sing by heart. .

My advice, for what it is worth, is that your DC will have zero memories of anything so if going to any baby class helps you then go for it but if it doesn't and you can provide stimulation in other ways, then don't feel remotely guilty.

If there’d been a taster season, I’d have done it.

I took my baby brother years ago to a baby sensory at Centre Parcs, and it was all fibre optic lights and lava lamps and glitter balls and funky music and bean bags to lay on. It was beautiful.

I thought it would be like that. Not laying on a dog-eared yoga mat waving a scarf with the blinding winter sun streaming in.

It’s a way to get out of the house and meet other parents and babies I guess!

Ha ha this made me laugh! I did baby sensory with my first but not with other two. Crazy expensive, the sign language is made up nonsense, and so hard to make friends - they have an agreement with NCT to advertise /promote classes so you tend to get gangs from there.

There are other classes out there. I found one I loved which mixed nursery rhymes with modern music, last weeks class was old school dance. We had bubbles and glow sticks to On a Ragga Tip. Was ace. And the lady running it is normal!!! She does actually know BSL and makaton and throws some in if you want to sign to the nursery rhymes but there’s no pressure! And the signs are useful (eg milk and nappy!) . I blooded hated that say hello to the sun song, after 3 terms I still didn’t know the signs!

@SlyAvocado the one that was like that near me, was the one at the free children’s centre! Probably closed down now though

I was like this with baby massage, I thought it was all guffy woo but it got me out the house and my baby liked being naked!

Everything for babies is "sensory" these.days!

Haha it's such load of shit isn't it! Our parents surely had nothing ridiculous like this and we are ok (ish). I've stayed away from all this, babies are bemused with all this massage and sensory stuff I reckon

Ah, you're the 'too cool for school' parent aren't you? The one who spends the whole group trying to prove how you are soooo different to all the other 'boring, normal' mums.

There is at least one in every baby group.

I bet you wear those black milk leggings and dye your hair bright colours don't you? I bet you dress your baby in expensive, brightly coloured Scandinavian tights and own a copy of 'go the fuck to sleep' don't you?

Congratulations! How ironic and original 😆.

@Doggydreaming

Ah, you're the 'too cool for school' parent aren't you? The one who spends the whole group trying to prove how you are soooo different to all the other 'boring, normal' mums.

There is at least one in every baby group.

I bet you wear those black milk leggings and dye your hair bright colours don't you? I bet you dress your baby in expensive, brightly coloured Scandinavian tights and own a copy of 'go the fuck to sleep' don't you?

Congratulations! How ironic and original 😆.

Meowwwww

@SlyAvocado 😂😂 you are a hilarious writer - this felt like a funny published weekly opinion column or something.

@Doggydreaming

Ah, you're the 'too cool for school' parent aren't you? The one who spends the whole group trying to prove how you are soooo different to all the other 'boring, normal' mums.

There is at least one in every baby group.

I bet you wear those black milk leggings and dye your hair bright colours don't you? I bet you dress your baby in expensive, brightly coloured Scandinavian tights and own a copy of 'go the fuck to sleep' don't you?

Congratulations! How ironic and original 😆.

And breathe

I didnt really go for my baby because we did sensory stuff at home all the time, I went to meet other mums to have friends. In the end I decided I didn't like them much and never went back.

Hahaha haha @Doggydreaming nope, you’re way off the mark with that description!

I don’t know what milk leggings are.
And DS wears whatever is decent and reasonably priced from the charity shop

Nice bit of projecting there though

@SlyAvocado

And I’m not sure my baby does either

We spent twenty minutes thanking the sun for shining on us and the corn for feeding us, and everyone else seemed to know all the sign language.

I don’t actually like corn so I didn’t particularly want to thank it, but the other mums seemed to really be appreciative of the corn and the other things in the song. The only sign I got to grips with was waving.

My baby didn’t give a toss anyway and spent most of the class staring at a bottle of hand sanitiser.

Then we waved some scarves over our baby’s faces, while the instructor danced around blowing bubbles to ‘Morning Has Broken’

My morning was broken at 4am anyway by my crap sleeper of a baby, 10am is practically afternoon for us.

I am new to the area so I tried to be jolly and talk to the other mums but they weren’t interested, I don’t know if it’s because I didn’t thank the corn.

I wore my Tears For Fears t-shirt with a sequinned blazer which might have been an odd choice but I thought, sequins are sensory aren’t they? The instructor asked if I was off to an 80’s party and I said no, I’m on my way back from one.

We will finish the course because I paid £65, so it’ll be like that time I got drunk and signed up to Zumba classes and made myself keep going even though I hated every minute of it and was rubbish and was asked to stand at the back by the fire exit.

Is there something I’m missing, are all baby sensory classes like that? Do I need to learn all the sign language?

I’m not overly bothered from a friendship point of view because we go to a music class too in a different area which is held in a pub and the parents are really friendly at that one. The baby also loves to shake a maraca like Bez, so I think he prefers it too.

Blog please!

It's for mums to socialise babies don't really give a toss they just want their mum for a cuddle, to be fed and warm .

@Doggydreaming

Ah, you're the 'too cool for school' parent aren't you? The one who spends the whole group trying to prove how you are soooo different to all the other 'boring, normal' mums.

There is at least one in every baby group.

I bet you wear those black milk leggings and dye your hair bright colours don't you? I bet you dress your baby in expensive, brightly coloured Scandinavian tights and own a copy of 'go the fuck to sleep' don't you?

Congratulations! How ironic and original 😆.

Who hurt you

I wish you’d been at my sensory class OP- I think we are on the same page & would get on well. I agree about the sun song!

Haha @SlyAvocado you're writing is hilarious I loved your honest review.

I actually liked baby sensory but height of covid I was glad to be allowed out the house again!!!

I do toddler sense now and my boy loves it

Oh op...you failed at the first hurdle I'm afraid with your outfit. You should have aimed for the middle class mum uniform of a breton top and outerwear in dull sludgly colours..

I loved baby sensory! It doesn’t sound like yours though (definitely no thanking corn ).

We just had themed stations with shiny things/rattles/scarves etc on them for the babies to reach for, coloured lights, and 10 minutes of songs at the end… plus they have really good coffee so that was me sorted. I’m gutted my LO has grown out of them.