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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Help. I need to pack and drive 80 miles tomorrow and I'm just kind of frozen

81 replies

Longcovid21 · 05/01/2022 19:53

I'm drained after a difficult Christmas and feeling slightly under the weather. I am mentally overwhelmed with the task of packing for me l, children and pets (including all the extra Xmas gifts) and worried I won't get everything in the car. Does anyone have any tips or advice please? I just don't know where to begin

OP posts:
BestestBrownies · 05/01/2022 21:42

OP you’re not alone. I have packing inertia/anxiety too. No matter if it’s for an overnight bag or moving house. I am not like it with anything else.

Something about packing just freaks me right out. I make a list, lay everything out on the bed according to the list and then fluff and panic about all the what-ifs. What if the weather changes? What if I can’t charge my electric toothbrush? What if I forget something vital? But there’s not enough space in my case to pack for all these potential eventualities, so which ones do I choose? And on and on…

DP on the other hand can pack his case in under 10min, close it and forget about it. Absolutely cannot fathom my angst.

I haven’t yet managed to persuade him to pack for me, but I’m working on it!

LauderSyme · 05/01/2022 21:48

keepsmefit Ah yes of course, because you would know.

Lindy2 · 05/01/2022 22:00

Where's your stuff now? Packing to come home is straightforward. You know what you brought with you and therefore what you need to take back.

Put the clothes you're all wearing tomorrow to one side then open your bags and put everything else in them.

If you've got extra stuff because of presents get a black bin bag or something similar and use that.

80 miles can be done in a couple of hours so it's not a long trip at all.

Postchristmasflab · 05/01/2022 22:03

If you forget something, cheep postal services are an option.

I get overwhelmed every time I pack, for anything. but there is literally not an essential that wouldn't cost you a few quid to replace if you forget.

Just breathe and remember nothing is the end of the world

Original poster
Longcovid21 · 05/01/2022 22:07

OP you’re not alone. I have packing inertia/anxiety too. No matter if it’s for an overnight bag or moving house. I am not like it with anything else.

Thanks. Its odd isn't it.

With these tips I'm getting there thank you.
Someone upthread has just reminded me of the sprawling pile of shoes at the front door

OP posts:
SiobhanSharpe · 05/01/2022 22:10

Aim to leave late morning-ish, (well after the morning rush hour) drive for an hour or so then stop for a pee/coffee/snacks and to recharge.
Then, taking it as easy as you like, another hour and a half should see you home.
I'm sure all will be well, have a good journey.

Crumble012 · 05/01/2022 22:10

Had to do this twice last week and I hate it too! Make a list of things you need for the journey and immediately when you get through the door. That’s your ‘car bag’.
Everything else just shove into bags- ideally separate bag for dirty clothes but don’t worry, it can be done later. Maybe get a good night’s sleep and get up a little earlier than the kids / get family to watch them so you can get on with packing tomorrow. Good luck, you’ve got this! Xx

INeedNewShoes · 05/01/2022 22:16

Pecking to go home is ALWAYS easier because you don’t have to decide what to take and pack it carefully.

After a stay with my DP I just go round every room checking all surfaces for stuff belonging to either me or DD and chuck it in a roughly relevant bag.

Packing to leave takes me half the time compared to packing to go in the first place.

JustJustWhy · 05/01/2022 22:20

I have a packing list spreadsheet. Honest to God. It includes camping as well! Any time I thought of something not on it, I added to it. I've not had to do this for ages now as it's a great list! I have packing anxiety too but not so much anymore.

LowlandLucky · 05/01/2022 22:20

You are over thinking this, it is only 80 miles.

EmmaC78 · 05/01/2022 22:25

There is no other solution apart from just getting on and doing it OP. As others have said, it doesn't need to be perfect, just chuck everything in bags and worry about organising it when you get home. The more you overthink it the more overwhelming it will seem.

MyGreenTutu · 05/01/2022 22:27
  1. Walk round wherever you've been staying with a large bag and throw in anything which belongs to you. Repeat in every room. You can sort it all out when you get home.
  2. As you go round, make a list of everything you can't pack because it's needed for the morning - eg dog lead, make up bag, toothbrushes. Then all you'll have to pack tomorrow before you depart is those few items and they're all in a list so you won't forget anything.
  3. Pull out from the bag an outfit and shoes for everyone you're travelling with tomorrow. Lay them out in your bedroom ready for the morning.
  4. Leave all bags piled together ready for your departure.
katkitty · 05/01/2022 22:31
  1. pack 2 or 3 simple outfits each in one carrier bag + a towel each and some money for the laundromat. Put them in the car ready now. Don't bother with toiletries, toothbrush and toothpaste etc can be bought whilst there
  1. put a dog crate in the boot with blanket and toy. Have a seperate water bottle and bowl handy as you'll need to stop to give them a drink
  1. get car seats, cushion each and blanket in the car the day before
  1. get pre-made food like sandwhiches and water bottles on your way there to save you prepping food the day before
  1. buy toiletries at your destination
WonderfulYou · 05/01/2022 22:47

If they have the space could you just leave most of the Xmas presents there and just take what you need?

Then go back in a few days when you’re feeling a bit better and without the pets.

lightisnotwhite · 05/01/2022 22:58

Well it’s only repacking the stuff you came with plus Christmas gifts surely?
Just shove it all in bags, leave clothes out for tomorrow and water bottles for everyone including pets.

It’s only 80 miles - hour and a half? You could drive there and back in a morning if you forget anything major.

Original poster
Longcovid21 · 05/01/2022 23:02

It's 80 miles of Welsh windey roads. I reckon 2 and a half hours. I've just asked the DCs to download a film onto the laptop to watch on route so that should make things quieter!

OP posts:
Original poster
Longcovid21 · 05/01/2022 23:03

I think it's the anxiety of a new school term all mixed in too. Why do they have to start back on a bloody Friday?

OP posts:
Dancingonmoonlight · 05/01/2022 23:03

Are you very ill OP?
Why are you wondering how to pack a car and drive for an hour back to your own house?
I don't get it?

Dancingonmoonlight · 05/01/2022 23:05

Just read its small roads so more than an hour. But it isn't snowing or treacherous ice? Its just a couple of hours in a car. You wont be alone on the road. Many people do much longer trips every day.

Original poster
Longcovid21 · 05/01/2022 23:06

Are you very ill OP?
Why are you wondering how to pack a car and drive for an hour back to your own house?
I don't get it?
Yes very sniffly and run down. Been in bed all day. As I said upthread it's more like 2 and a half hrs.

OP posts:
AgathaMystery · 05/01/2022 23:08

I know it’s heartless but full a bag/box with gifts you don’t want/like & also things you took with you that have been replaced by gifts (new trainers etc). Drop the bag/box off at a charity shop en route. Then it doesn’t even come into your house.

Also pack dirty clothes in carrier bags knotted up and just pile them all by the washer when you get home. Chuck the first load in when you walk in the door so by the time the car is empty and the kids are unpacking the first load is almost finished.

pickingdaisies · 05/01/2022 23:15

This is the trouble with Aibu, OP. You'll get quick answers, but you also get the hard of thinking who don't understand why a task that's easy for them is not easy for someone else. You're doing a great job of ignoring them! ( In solidarity, because while I'm ok packing, there are other things that make my brain freeze.)

CheesyWeez · 05/01/2022 23:15

I always feel like this OP. Specifically about packing. I always start far too late the night before and stay up too late doing it. I hate it and I hate myself for doing it so late.

Like JustJustWhy I have a list on my computer of everything I might need on a trip. It makes my late night panic packing go faster. I keep the list up to date (recently crossed out "camera" and added "Disposable masks" for example)

OP could you put the stuff in piles by the door so you can put it all in the car tomorrow?

Original poster
Longcovid21 · 05/01/2022 23:18

OK thanks all. I'm. Half done with bags in the bedroom. I've visualised how I'm going to get it in the car (hopefully). I have a list and will do part 2 tomorrow morning, I want to set off by lunch time.

OP posts:
WonderfulYou · 05/01/2022 23:25

You sound very tired OP. I would get some sleep and then do it in the morning. I can’t do things like that in the evenings as I get overwhelmed.

You’ll have more energy tomorrow morning and then you can just shove it all in and sort it out when you get home.

The good thing about the kids going back on Friday means that the next day you can all have a lie in and relax instead of doing a full week of school/work.