To ask nursery keyworker to babysit?

[Lindor2828]

Or would this be inappropriate? We are looking for a regular babysitter, someone who is familiar to us and DS for the occasional evening so we can resume date nights etc. We really like his keyworker and they have a close bond so I was wondering if it would be appropriate to ask at pickup whether she would be interested in babysitting for us - has anyone else done this? Not sure if it's the done thing or not!

Also, the above was popular with nursery staff who were keen to go on to nannying roles as it meant they could put some one-to-one, in-home experience on their CVs. I was a reference for at least one nursery worker in that situation - confirming that she cared for DS in our home, was responsible, could prepare him a meal etc etc.

Nursery I work at we're allowed to. Few things got to follow such as not wearing uniform and not discussing things outside of work but other then that.. works well for parents too as at least it's someone they and the children knows. But places different

I used staff at DS's nursery when I needed help following surgery when I was bed bound for 6 weeks. I needed someone to come to our home, get DS out of bed and dressed (I couldn't lift), take him to nursery with them and then bring him home - essentially wrap around nannies. I spoke to the manager first and she was really happy to help/support. She asked for volunteers and we set up a rota of 3-4 staff. We paid them something like £100 a day, which was less than an emergency nanny would have been and also better for DS, as these were people he (and I) knew. It was good extra money for the staff and didn't impact on their working hours - everyone was happy.

The key is to speak to the manager first before approaching staff.

We did this and she was happy to earn the extra money

My sons nursery are fine with it, we did it once.

My sons nursery are fine with it, we did it once.

My sons nursery are fine with it, we did it once.

@Penguinsmum

We did it. The nursery allowed it and my son's key worker was very happy to get the extra money. She charged £10 per hour.

This is the exact same for us and our nursery. We had our nursery nurse in over Xmas to babysit and she said that they all made an agreement to charge 10 pounds an hour for those who accepted extra babysitting jobs.

FYI, for what it's worth, we also had a sign a disclosure with the nursery and tell them about. it.

I did it. I went through the manager and she babysat too, long after my children had started school.

Of course it’s not inappropriate. What could be inappropriate about it? It may be against the nursery policy, but that is different. I am astonished at the mindset of people who think that such an arrangement is inherently “inappropriate”.

I would tell the key worker that you are looking for a regular babysitter and ask whether she would be interested AND permitted to do that. Make it clear that you don’t want to go against nursery policy. And that you only want to employ her if she is permitted to do it. I personally would not ask the manager first as I think that is undermining the key worker. If you tell her you don’t want to go against nursery policy, presumably you trust her enough to have confidence she will be honest with you about that.

Ask her. We do it and are very happy with it.

I should add that if you agree terms with the key worker I would then ask her to inform the nursery and to copy you in to that. It’s her job to do that in my view not yours. She needs to retain agency over her own working arrangements. You need to be sure there has been transparency.

We do it and often they want the extra money. If they want to do there will be someone in the room. Approach key worker first and if they want it then, if not ask the room leader if they if any of the other staff want to babysit

At my nursery they offer baby sitting for charity auction bids so it's a very known thing that the staff do baby sitting

We used to do this when ours were at nursery it was no big deal.

Our nursery allowed it, if the request was made via the manager and the person wasn’t the direct key worker of the child.

The suggestion it might be inappropriate (or be felt inappropriate) is not groundless. The nursery will have a policy on this and for this reason I'd ask the head/manager first, rather than approaching the kw directly.

The difficulties for a nursery here are largely around safeguarding (blurred lines) and liability (should the worst happen, are the nursery to an extent culpable - either legally or in the eyes of the local press - and how do they feel about that risk?). The nursery may also feel it's simply a headache they can avoid (eg if nursery staff cancels at short notice and parents drag nursery leaders in, start griping in WhatsApp groups etc) and/or may prefer their staff don't take on additional work to the detriment of the job they pay them for (complicated when on NMW, but this is not true of all nursery staff by any means - quick scan of LA vacancies will demonstrate).

Some nurseries get around this stuff with waivers, others by having a no babysitting policy. Not arguing the latter is the only right option, but to challenge those saying it's ridiculous to even ask.

You cant go through official nursery channels, they can't sanction this as a business- they would have to do lone worker risk assessments, check what hours they were doing per day, change their insurance etc etc so its logistically not possible for them as a business.

Approaching individuals who work there, privately, is a completely different thing and very common and totally acceptable. Nursery workers get paid like shit for looking after loads of kids at once and a lot of them jump at the chance to earn a bit of extra cash to look after just a couple of kids who are likely to be asleep some if not all of the time, at a higher hourly rate. And as long as it doesnt affect their job (eg they make arrangements in nursery time or are too tired in the day after babysitting the evening before) its nothing to do with nursery as a business. Just if anything went wrong you wouldn't be able to complain to nursery. I'd also make it clear it was an offer and it's completely fine for them to turn it down

I’ve never needed to ask at DD’s nursery as we have family nearby but my niece’s key worker regularly babysits her. It’s not remotely unusual or inappropriate.

Our son’s keyworker babysits him loads (we checked with the nursery manager at the outset whether she was ok with it and she was). We’ve asked her to look after him when I go into hospital to have DS2.

It’s wonderful having a qualified childcare professional who has a really close relationship with our son to babysit him. I feel so much better about it than asking a local teenager or even my parents tbh.

All you can do is ask, it might be against your nursery’s policy but it certainly isn’t an wildly inappropriate question.

It was totally normal at both nurseries that we used but the nursery manager in both cases had a notice on the board identifying which staff were willing to do it and what the minimum hourly rate was. It’s ideal - they know your child and are much better qualified than a teenage daughter of friends. We paid for the taxi home if they didn’t drive. We only moved on to teenage daughters if friends a while after ours had left nursery or the nursery staff member had taken up a new career eg nursing.

Nursery will have a policy on whether it is allowed or not. Ours allows it, with certain expectations/ restrictions such as it accept be at a time when nursery is open, confirmation that it is a private arrangement and organised outside of nursery - so you can get private contact details but then arrange details outside of pick up or drop off. We’ve done it a few times and it’s worked well.

@PinkWaferBiscuit

I really don’t understand this post.

Me either, I genuinely can't understand how it could be awkward, inappropriate or not professional.

It's really really common for nursery staff to babysit the children who attend their settings. It's not like your asking your accountant or the person who delivers your weekly food shop. It's really odd anyone would think it was so unreasonable when up and down the country it happens every week.

It's not allowed at my nursery. Your circumstances aren't everyone's, that shouldn't be too hard to understand, surely?

It's not allowed at my nursery. Your circumstances aren't everyone's, that shouldn't be too hard to understand, surely?

I understand perfectly well that it isn't something that happens at every nursery and that some have policies against it. That's not what I and the other poster were confused over.

We were saying we didn't understand how anyone could say it was inappropriate, awkward or unprofessional for it to happen. Surely even though you know it doesn't happen at your nursery you wouldn't use such emotive words to describe something which is so common place elsewhere. That's the part we didn't understand.

The Early Years safeguarding training I did suggested that we needed a firm policy on staff babysitting for families it due to potential abuse. I believe it was in the aftermath of the Vanessa George case amid concerns that anyone with sinister intentions gaining access to children in their own homes with no other oversight might be a cause for concern.

As I recall (and it was a couple of years ago, so forgive the fuzziness!) there was also quite a lot around liability, confidentiality, the nature of their DBS being linked to the setting etc. I don't think it's a cut and dried 'no', just a situation that needs careful monitoring and one which the nursery should have a policy on. This lays out some of the concerns to be considered: www.redwing-solutions.co.uk/blog/approach-staff-babysitting-children-early-years-setting/