Stuff is too hard to get rid of

[Clutterbusting]

I want to be free of my stuff. I’m drowning in it. My house is a mess and all that happens when I have a sort out is it gets moved about. I spend money on storage solutions when I need to just get rid.
I want to but where to? Charity shops are picky and I have A LOT to shift. Selling takes too long and I can’t be wasteful so a skip is out. What can I do?
AIBU to think this is just too hard?

I feel for you I’m exactly the same, I need to try and sort it out once and for all this year, wish I had some helpful advice sorry

@Tippexy

You can be ‘wasteful.’

You can get a skip.

You should get a skip.

Saying you can’t, is yet another excuse to hang on to all the old crap.

Absolutely agree with this. If OP has tried everything to recycle stuff then in the skip it goes, guilt and burden free. We carry so much crap around with us. I'm going through a similar exercise and it's liberating!

Besides food banks, maybe every town should also have clothes, books, toys, furniture and other assorted banks. Free to take away.

@SoupDragon

Has anyone mentioned fly tipping yet?

I think MN should start putting bingo cards at the top of threads. For this thread we could then mark off:

Fly-tipping outside charity shops
FB marketplace
Marie Kondo
Having a stall outside your house
Car boot sales
Employing a professional declutterer.

Of course the bingo card alone wouldn't cut it. You'd need some sort of boxing glove arrangement to fly out of the screen if, on page 20, people still replied to messages on page 1 as if they were the first person to do so.

Yes, I know, I'm being grumpy.

We have a fb page for our housing estate and people post on it pictures of toys, furniture, bikes, boxes of books, anything really and just say we dont need these anymore does anyone want them for free, if weather is ok they leave outside for the day and anyone takes whatever they want and when its gone its gone.

As long as they are in good condition they usually go really quickly. I think people are fed up with the hassle that goes with trying to sell smaller items.

Oh god. I forgot skips and the local tip.

Just do it - you will feel amazing. Visited friends over holidays who had a massive clear out, they said over 200 bags to charity shops.

They used the ‘spark joy’ method, have inspired me to to the same, so I’ve made a list to spread the cost.

I hate the blinds in my bedroom- on the list to replace. A bowl given as a wedding present- it’s going to charity.

Post it free on your local sites. Set a time limit and take it to the bins at the tip if there is no response. Find a better charity shop. But if it is good quality why do you care if they look at it? I think you are ruling out options unduly.

I can’t be wasteful so a skip is out. What can I do? AIBU to think this is just too hard?

@Clutterbusting You're choosing to make it even harder for yourself.

If it's not been said before - i you're in the UK, icollectclothes.co.uk is brilliant. You just book a collection and leave the stuff outside your house on the given day and they'll pick up. They take clothes and toys etc and donate to a number of different charities.

Try and give it away. Give it a week. If no-one wants it, throw it away. As PP said, it's as wasteful sat in your house as it is sat in landfill.
Toys will always find a home - pre-schools, toddler groups, etc. Someone will be happy to collect from your house as well.
But do have a time limit. One week - no takers - get rid. Do a handful at a time and it will soon be gone.

Freecycle or gumtree freebies. You’d be surprised at what people will take. Then, moving forward, don’t buy so much and be firm with friends and relatives about buying unwanted gifts for the kids.

I would also strongly recommend getting a friend to help you who won’t have the same emotional attachment to your stuff as you. Do a room at a time and separate into piles - sell (online for individual good pieces, via Cash 4 Clothes or similar for bundles of lesser clothes, or at a real auction - the auction house will break your submissions up into individual/mixed lots); donate (to charity shop, Women’s aid charities or via Freecycle, FB Marketplace or Shpock); recycle; bin; and keep (but only if you must). Have plenty of bags, bins and boxes ready, and a skip, or you’ll be tempted to keep it, just in case. And be ruthless: if you haven’t used it in six months, chances are, you never will. Better to sell it and make a bit of dosh, or donate it so that someone else can benefit. And remember to recycle wherever you can before you absolutely put it in the skip. There’s not a lot which can’t be sold, donated or recycled, really!

A bit at a time. Every journey is made out of small steps etc. Always have an 'exit plan' for objects e.g. an appointment at the charity shop if that's currently required etc

I’ve just donated 8!!! Yes 8 bags of clothing all children’s - the nicest clothes I’ve kept for my nieces but I’ve even but clothes with tags on in the bags. I’ve then driven to the Salvation Army went round the back of the shop - called them and they came out and took two bags off me. The rest have gone to Marie Curie - I did the same drove round the back.

Oh I called them and they said bring them through

I feel your pain. I have 'stuff' and I just feel overwhelmed with it all. I have managed to sell and donate some things and felt really good about it but I get so attached to things.
It's ridiculous and stresses me out and I know that if I decluttered it would be easier to maintain my house but in-between working, volunteering, children, a puppy and all the general day to day household chores I never seem to get time. I am feeling quite determined at the moment though so fingers crossed for a new year miracle.

Put on fb as free stuff

@Clutterbusting have you seen this

www.bhf.org.uk/shop/donating-goods/book-furniture-collection-near-me

British Heart Foundation will collect furniture and also bags at the same time, or you can box up and post to them using Collect+

Vinted is good for selling toys and clothes - buyer pays postage

Is there a children’s centre or community centre near you? I’m sure there’s loads of local places that would be grateful for toys to give to out to kids in need

Following and absorbing for inspiration as this is the year DP and I have pledged to sort our cumulative shit out, pardon my French.

We both have collecting / hoarding / mild psychological stuff going on, and it was compounded by his Mum going into a home and my Mum dying nearly 2 years ago.....but it doesn't seem that long ago..... and we have their stuff with all the emotional baggage attached.....I think some of the more mundane stuff is sticking around because, daft as it sounds, it gives a vague illusion they're not really gone...... MIL has advanced dementia and is "gone" in all but body.....

Though we are in our 50s, our inner children are pretty pushy - both from broken homes, both from families who kind of put the fun in dysfunctional one way and another.?.

Sorry to bang on and de-rail, but looking at why alongside the how is my sort of coping mechanism - knowledge is power and all that.....

Anyway, good luck OP and I hope to be following you down the de-cluttering path soon - and to others in our positions, best of luck

I had a big problem with all the stuff I’d accumulated and our spare room was full as were all cupboards. One day I thought enough was enough!

• Big items went to a local charity who collected.
• I went for quick wins - getting hold of a bin bag and putting as much rubbish in as I could.
• Picked any nicer items out and put together in a box to sell and if they didn’t sell I got rid of, gave myself a deadline for this
• Got clothes in bin liners to go in clothing bank at the tip, same with shoes
• Found a charity who wanted toys and did a big drop off

It wasn’t easy but I was so pleased when I did it. This thread is motivating me to do another clear out!

I googled a company who just came and a picked it up (I live in London). All I had to do was bag it up and leave it in my porch. I had to register and book a collection day. They sort it out and give the money to charity. I had 18 bags!

Please do not leave things outside charity shops.
When you do this you’re not helping us at all!
The bags get rifled through, people leave us the rubbish to get rid of which costs us money.
Doing this is really for your own benefit.... not ours.
It’s a crappy thing to do

The thing is, if you keep the stuff in your house rather than putting it in a skip, you're just treating your house like a skip instead. The stuff is rubbish and not wanted whether it has been abandoned inside or outside.

(the same applies to eating food you don't want to avoid wasting it - you are not a bin, don't chuck waste into your tum!)

There are loads of skip companies who will recycle everything they collect. Hire one asap and get rid!

Outstanding, OP, well done!!

My sister & I have just emptied mum's house, she's gone into residential care.
I see a lot of people recommend BHF for collecting furniture. We found them useless. If furniture doesn't have fire retardent labels on, don't bother. If furniture is mahogany, don't bother. If a bed isn't pristine - and with labels - (mum's luckily was) don't bother. A full wall of wardrobes - three that were meant to stand together - nope, didn't want those either.
The wardrobes are still in the house, we had to chop good solid mahogany furniture up as BHF assumed it was veneered when it wasn't.
No one on the local FB page wanted it but all recommended BHF to collect (screams at this point)
I don't have transport so couldn't possibly be back & forth if I advertised everything. It's not the kind of area where you could leave things out for folk to help themselves (mainly oldies).
I've used FB marketplace before for my own things. People don't bother coming, or want it delivering, despite saying NO DELIVERY in the ads..
We tried to book a skip but the business said well you can't put A, B & C into it.. it was all a complete NIGHTMARE. Got one eventually that wasn't so picky but it wasn't as big as we'd have liked, hence chopping everything up. I would have LOVED the furniture (they were good, if dated, pieces) to go to women setting up on their own after being in refuges or something, but how to GET to these people? It's such a shame. :-(

I was luckier with some things - I got in touch with a lady who collects towels, bedding etc (just not duvets & pillows) for cats & dogs in shelters. They took about ten or more black sacks full of goods, bless them!
Also the local hospice charity shop - they took LOADS. :-) Do check on their website, though, ours only accepted donations on two days a week. Also if you have suitcases, don't donate those until last, ferry ornaments, clothes etc IN them back & forth to the charity shop!

Summing up - get rid of as much as possible on each occasion. Don't advertise one thing & wait for someone who may or may not show up. It's demoralising. Don't try & sell odd bits & bobs on Music Magpie, ebay & the like, you get almost nothing back & it all takes forever. That's my experience. Good luck!