To find Christmas Day a bit dull with teens.

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Don’t get me wrong, thoughtful presents and their presence at Christmas lunch( which is over so quick) but the rest of the day they disappear and it’s just me and Dh. Could be any other day and it’s dull. Is that just the way it is?

I remember (35+ years ago) being absolutely bored out of my mind at Christmas as a teenager.

My brother was generally with his Dad so it was just me, mum + grandparent. Miles away from friends. I don’t think I enjoyed Christmas again until I had my own daughter.

We've had ours all day aside from snooze time, walk in the morning, presies, lunch and post snooze Christmas quiz but each have to come up with own round so they've had to write their own, hopefully some karaoke later.

Mine are 16 and 17. We spent all of yesterday together, restaurant cinema then take away with grandparents. Today we opened presents at 8.30 and they've been downstairs with me ever since. No one is more surprised than me

We’ve got an only 14yo plus no family near by so I’ve been very conscious that it might be very dull for ds. He got a bit upset yesterday but today it’s gone really well. A film, some games and now he is chatting to his friends on the Xbox. But I do agree OP that it’s dull in early teen years - until they can start going to the pub!

I was only thinking earlier that I miss being a teen and just spending Christmas Day reading my new book. At the time it was deathly dull but now I am responsible for making Christmas happen (or at least I am until lunchtime but still feel obliged to spend the afternoon playing board games or engaging in family chat) when all I want to do is disappear with a book. No doubt once the DC are older and I have that chance again, I will moan about how quiet and dull the day is!
I'm generally satisfied with my lot but would sometimes like to press pause on life and step outside of it into an alternative life when I have a bit more time for myself!

I just asked them if I’m ruining their life by making them spend time with me and they are looking at me like I’m crazy

💫

Mine have spent the whole day with us and their younger siblings; it’s been a delight. 13, 14 and 17 and they’ve been appreciative of everything, helpful, chatty and playful. Even came on our walk wearing handmade Frozen masks their 4 year old sister had painstakingly spent hours making for us all! Better than the day we put the tree up and my 14 yr old DS made me unexpectedly cry with his attitude. Teens are funny old things.

DS is 3 and was so overtired that by 4pm he was restless, whiny and grumpy. He kept trying to wrestle with me until I put a stop to that after he accidentally yabked out a clump of my hair. I'm hoping the best Christmas years are 5-11ish

I foster teens and I’ve had to work very hard to keep it fun as it can be very much like any other day with them all in their rooms in their screens. Current routine is to open stockings whenever they get up rather than wake them- we finished at about 12 today as they came down in their own time. We’d had a late night doing an online quiz which they loved. At 12 we went to the local posh pub and had mocktail sand cocktails with extended family and then we came back opened presents in a frenzy, and I’ve cooked while they chilled. We have had a mixture of traditional and Korean food, eaten together and now we are chilling with presents.
Things I have found helpful

• Going out at lunchtime for food or drink
• Not rigidly following tradition
• getting them a couple of gifts that are something to do, such as Lego
• me and my DH getting each other nice presents so we feel a bit spoilt, and so we also have things to ‘do’.

It’s very different to when they are little, but much more relaxed. -

My two are downstairs playing a game together, with a movie on, it's me that's crept upstairs for some quiet time!

Well mine has just announced she’s bored like it’s a problem l have to solve😡

Doesn’t want to go for a walk, play a game or watch a film. What else is there?🙄or am l missing something?

Dull ? No! 15 year old DS was up at 5:50.
Been full of energy all day. He even went for a run

Teens have grown out of the "magic of Christmas" that's all. Just find a new balance for the next few years between what your version of xmas is and theirs.

My completely disinterested ds20 made it all worth it by writing in the xmas card (that I bought him):

Thanks for being there for me this year

What more could a mother possibly ask for than that

YABU but only because I'm jealous of all the lovely restful time you'll have had! Mine are 2 and 4 and I'm exhausted with not enough hours in the day!

Yes when they get a bit older, a little of the magic has gone. My DC these days ask for cash rather than presents (so cash and stocking fillers only). The day itself is still special though. Nice food and everyone together. The teens do their own thing for a good portion of the day. As toddlers, it was nice that they were up at often ungodly times of Christmas Day screaming “he’s been, he’s been! And then running round like demons possesses until late on in the evening. It was fun. Exhausting, but fun.

Things that help are going to pub to play cards on Christmas Eve, dog walk this morning, teens entertaining grandparents, playing a game like Who am I after dinner.
After tidying up they can then do what they want!

"I'm hoping the best Christmas years are 5-11"

@ToykotoLosAngeles me too... it'll get easier!

I think it changes too OP. Most teens are all about their friends and though some do spend family time at Xmas it’s not a given. We all used to text each other saying how bored we were! Just try and enjoy the peace.
I’ve loved this Christmas- kids have been in and out and one is off to get bf for the night now. I’m just enjoying the peace!

I've had a great day with my teens! We are isolating so just us. Got up at 11 and make smoked salmon and scrambled eggs then opened presents. All watched Die Hard together then made lunch (well dinner by the time it was done!). Chatted over food then DS played with his new 3D printer and DD watched Jimmy Carrs new stand up with us. They are now chatting online to friends while we watch a film. I love it. So relaxed and they spent more time with us than they normally do. Also teens are so funny and good to talk to.

Tomorrow we come out of isolation and we are driving to London to see lights and get a Shake Shack.

I much prefer having teens anyway but xmas is great with them.

@PiesNotGuys

My teens are currently playing on the living room floor and we have a film on. One is putting together Lego and the other is scrapbooking.

I wouldn’t let them disappear on Christmas Day, or most days to be absolutely honest. I even managed to wangle one at a time keeping me company in the kitchen when making Christmas dinner, that does actually make a change.

I just asked them if I’m ruining their life by making them spend time with me and they are looking at me like I’m crazy.

Christ I'd be moving out at 18! Do they get any time on their own? It's pretty normal for teens to spend a lot of time in their rooms.

When mine were teens they would go off to their rooms for a while and then we would reconvene at an agreed time to watch a film, play a game etc. There were some years when one or other of them wasn't quite in the Christmas spirit but as a previous poster said, now in their 20s it has come full circle and they are fully engaged again, helping me out and generally being lovely.

3 teens here, they had an hour upstairs after presents then back together for lunch. Chat with grandparents who came for lunch and card games this afternoon now they've just gone up fornth rest of the evening

Mine are 12 & 14 and it's been mixed. Ds2 stayed awake until I put his stocking in at midnight. I strongly suspected he was faking sleep but there was no way I was staying awake any later. After opening it he came in my bed at about 1am and then woke at about 8ish when ds1 came in.

They were opening presents and showing me what I'd bought them until about 11.30 and then I started cooking. After lunch I had a bath and they were on tech. If they'd wanted to play a game or something I wouldn't have had a bath but they were engrossed in books and tech. We've watched a film and now they've wandered off so I'm watching Get Back. I do sometimes feel like we should do more but there's only the three of us and I need down time too. I find the best times we have together happen spontaneously or when I'm well-rested rather than me trying to enforce something I'm not in the mood for either.

Luckily, as a teacher I'm off the whole time they are so I'll make sure we do some walks/outings/game playing etc over the course of the two weeks so it balances out.

Our DS(16) was with us most of the day, even helped with the washing up, but then went off to work this evening to do more washing up at a hotel (meant he avoided Call the Midwife!)