About to lose my Christmas shit already!

[Slayduggee]

I’m about to lose my shit already. I do 99% of the Christmas prep for context. Today DH has -

• moaned that I needed to nip to the supermarket to get some last minute bits I couldn’t find in other supermarkets. Apparently, I (not him) should have bought stuff earlier. The reason I don’t get things earlier is because he will drink/eat all the Christmas stuff (even when it’s hidden)
• moaned when I finished work and wanted to open some Christmas food (whilst eating the Christmas biscuits he has opened)
• rolled his eyes when I said I was having a bath. Everyone else was glued to the tv so I thought it would be a good idea to have a quick bath before the 4/5 hours or wrapping/cleaning/cooking prep this evening.
• I put a couple of curry ready meals in the oven as I wanted to cook something no effort this evening in preparation for the cleaning/prepping/wrapping marathon. Apparently that’s unacceptable as the kids will drop rice on the floor (which I need to clean later anyway)

On the minus side DH is not going to the pub this evening! I normally crack open some wine and put some music on and crack on with all the prep and enjoy myself!

What’s your AIBU? That your husband is a knob? YANBU.

YANBU.

He sounds awful

Yeah, my DP is really annoying me tonight.

Nothing Christmas related. But lots of coughing (not covid - he’s dehydrated), random hiccups, slurping his drink.

Like, how loud is his face tonight?

There was a thread earlier about the ludicrously low standards of some women. This fits right in.

I mean, why OP?

Is he normally such a knob?

On the minus side DH is not going to the pub this evening!

Why's that a minus? If he went you could lock him out.

Tell him that if he doesn't like the way you do Christmas, he needs to do it. And don't make effort if he's just going to crap all over it.

If you did lose your shit would he change his behaviour and, if it did, how long for?

Why are you still with him? You clearly loathe each other and I can’t imagine it’s a nice environment for your children.

I honestly don't understand how women remain married to men like this. What is the point?

I don't have a DP and this kind of shit is part of the reason.

Hopefully santa brings you some ducks that you can put in a row.

Your husband is a bit of a twat. And that's putting it mildly.

I don’t really understand relationships like this. Why persevere.

@TheLightSideOfTheMoon

Yeah, my DP is really annoying me tonight.

Nothing Christmas related. But lots of coughing (not covid - he’s dehydrated), random hiccups, slurping his drink.

Like, how loud is his face tonight?

H*ow loud is his face tonight? * I am full of flu (definitely not covid before anyone pounces - negative LFT and PCRs) and that has got me full on laughing.

And grateful I'm single.

Tell him to stop being a knob. Then tell him next year he will be doing everything for Christmas, cleaning, shopping, cooking, wrapping, everything.
If he does make sure you rip his efforts to shreds at every opportunity. When he complains about it you can tell him that's how he made you feel this year.

Yes he sounds like a knob.

I don't understand the wrapping marathon though. It's one of those MN things I'd never otherwise heard about that people do all their wrapping on Christmas Eve. Seems massively unnecessarily tense to leave it all to the last minute.

I have two DC under school age. 2 x sets of nursery fees plus mortgage would wipe out my entire salary not leaving no money for food/essential bills. DH is not a high earner so maintenance wouldn’t fill the gap. I need to sit and wait 3 years until both DC are at school.

He wasn’t always a knob. He started to be a lazy knobber after DC1 was born, then improved but with the pandemic has developed into a moaning old man/lazy knobber.

I will wrap do dinner and bedtime and wrap DC’s presents then the gloves are off.

You’re the one putting up with him and his bull shit. Don’t. You don’t even seem surprised he’s being such a twat so it wasn’t unexpected.

You know they’re not all like this. You know we’re not all door mats. You know your life could be better.

What are you going to do about it so you’re in a better place next year?

As a single parent, you might get a good chunk of nursery fees covered by benefits. The "Entitled to" website night give you a pleasant surprise.
I agree, life us too short to put up with such a nit picky, bone idle waster.
Also live the noisy face description 😂

Just tell him he’s a knob and ignore him. I feel rage toward him and i’m not living with him. Bide your time, then LTB

@DappledThings

Yes he sounds like a knob.

I don't understand the wrapping marathon though. It's one of those MN things I'd never otherwise heard about that people do all their wrapping on Christmas Eve. Seems massively unnecessarily tense to leave it all to the last minute.

I do the same.

Although I live in a relatively big house, the storage is poor. There is no where to carefully stash wrapped presents, and DD believes that Santa brings all the gifts, so they can't go under the tree before Christmas Eve night once she's in bed.

I'll be buggered if I'm spending hours wrapping, putting it all in the loft, to then need to rewrap them anyway

@Slayduggee

I have two DC under school age. 2 x sets of nursery fees plus mortgage would wipe out my entire salary not leaving no money for food/essential bills. DH is not a high earner so maintenance wouldn’t fill the gap. I need to sit and wait 3 years until both DC are at school.

He wasn’t always a knob. He started to be a lazy knobber after DC1 was born, then improved but with the pandemic has developed into a moaning old man/lazy knobber.

I will wrap do dinner and bedtime and wrap DC’s presents then the gloves are off.

Eat his dinner. If he's only going to moan about what you make, he can do his own.

He sounds like a real knob.

Shame you have to wait a couple of years because I can tell you as a single mum my life is way easier without a man baby in it.

YABU to remain with this tosser.

He's not going to stop treating you like that, so you're going to have to grin and bear it.

The alternative is to leave, which it sounds like you have discounted because you don't think you can afford it/manage it alone (you probably can, with a few adjustments). And let me guess, he's a 'great father' 👀