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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU for cancelling the milkman

39 replies

AnnmayL · 17/12/2021 13:28

We have a milk man delivering twice a week, it is a really useful service for us and lovely milk. The only problem is the milk is delivered at 1-3am with a bright torch. This sends our dog crazy and then wakes us up. We don't want to train the dog out of guarding the house at night if someone is shining a torch near our windows...
I have raised this with the milkman but I am not sure if he is trying his best. It wouldn't be too bad if the milk was delivered at say 5-6am, is it normal for milk to be delivered in the early hours?

AIBU here?? What do other people do with dogs?

OP posts:
ChangeChingyChange · 17/12/2021 13:34

I think YABU really and are probably best off without the milkman. He can't walk around in the pitch black and its normal for milk to be delivered on a very early morning round. Just pop to the shop for milk from now on.

negomi90 · 17/12/2021 13:37

The milk man comes at a specific time. Not using a torch and not being able to see would be very dangerous for him.
If it doesn't work for you, then cancel. But I don't see what they could do differently. The other option is get your dog to sleep on the other side of the house, so the light wouldn't bother it (or put blackout curtains in the room where the dog sleeps).

Kite22 · 17/12/2021 14:17

Y would BU to ask the milkman to stumble around in the dark.
Y would BU to try to train your dogs not to bark if people are outside your house with torches in the middle of the night.

So, YWNBU to cancel the milkman as it doesn't work for you.

Kbyodjs · 17/12/2021 14:22

Our milkman wakes me up making noise at 2am as he’s just under our bedroom window and even though I go to bed knowing he’s coming I still jerk awake at 2am thinking someone is breaking in and struggle to get back to sleep. Because of that I cancelled him and I can’t say I really felt bad about it as it just didn’t work for us

Hemingwayscatz · 17/12/2021 14:24

We used the modern milkman last year but stopped when we realised they were dropping them off between midnight and 1am meaning the milk was out for a good 6-7 hours. Ok during the colder months, not so great when it’s summer. Also had short expiration dates so they once delivered 3 bottles of milkshake that went off 2 days later… Oh and they stopped collecting the empties.

It’s more expensive than milk from the shop so if you’re unhappy with the service, of course you should cancel.

Agadorsparticus · 17/12/2021 14:34

We had to ask the milkman to drop the milk at the side gate rather than the front door as he was setting off our driveway alarm. Is there a spot that he could drop the milk without disturbing the dog?

SenseSphere · 17/12/2021 14:55

I don’t think it’s reasonable to expect the whole milk round to be moved to avoid upsetting your dogs. It is usual, based on my own milk delivery, for them to arrive in the very early hours of the morning. I assume they have to get round all of the houses.

Also unreasonable to expect him to switch off the torch. I assume he needs it or it wouldn’t be on, and probably dangerous if it’s pitch black without.

RozHuntleysStump · 17/12/2021 15:24

I stopped my milk man because he dropped it off at about 1am which woke me up as my bedroom is at the front of the house. He didn’t even try to be quiet. Also, when the sun comes up early, it beats down on the milk till I get up. Grim.

ivykaty44 · 17/12/2021 15:29

Just get all the milk delivered once a week - still be fresher than the shop

ivykaty44 · 17/12/2021 15:31

off between midnight and 1am meaning the milk was out for a good 6-7 hours.

This happens at some supermarkets, it’s left outside for hours in the day time etc- it’s just you don’t see that part

Disfordarkchocolate · 17/12/2021 15:33

Can you get some movement sensitive lights on the path, ones that are fairly dim?

Branleuse · 17/12/2021 15:37

I would cancel the milkman if this was waking us all up every time.
Its already more expensive, so they at least need to be not pissing you off at 2am

MoFoFlo · 17/12/2021 15:43

We have the opposite problem, our milkman doesn't deliver until about 9 - 9.30am. Fine now I'm mostly working from home, but on days I'm going out for work straight after the school run we're left with milk on the doorstep all day. Considering cancelling but out milkman is such a lovely old chap - I swear the delivery is so late because he stops for a chat at every other house.

girlmom21 · 17/12/2021 15:49

Can you just get a permanent outside light?

LethargicActress · 17/12/2021 15:49

If you’ve asked and they can’t or won’t accommodate your request then of course you should cancel. Delivery times in the middle of the night is why I don’t use a milkman.

icedcoffees · 17/12/2021 16:01

Well, he can't do his job in the pitch black.

If your dogs are disturbed and you don't want them not to bark, then the milkman isn't for you.

TuftyMarmoset · 17/12/2021 16:25

Ours comes around 3am but doesn’t seem to use a torch, our street does have streetlights though - is it really dark where you are? Could you leave an outside light on instead?
Or blackout curtains for where the dog is?

Boiledbeetle · 17/12/2021 16:29

Back in the olden days the milkman I worked for would be at the dairy making sure his float was fully charged and loading his orders between 1 and 2 am then the first houses would get their milk delivered at about 2.30am and the last milk would be delivered at about 8.30 am.

These days they start delivering any time from about 11pm by me which is way to early even in the cold winter months. In the summer the milk will be off by breakfast time.

I will say though at no point, summer or winter, did we use a torch as both hands were carrying milk bottles. You just got by with the street lights and the float lights. You soon learnt where you could and couldn't step so whilst I get health and safety exists today there is no excuse for them to be using a torch in my eyes.

But then I'm a child of the 70s it was a very dangerous decade! Health and Safety was an afterthought for many!

Rosebel · 17/12/2021 16:34

We don't use a milkman but my parents did for years and we used to get milk from about 5 in the morning, often later especially on Saturday.
Is it a recent thing for them to deliver it in the very early hours?

Aprilx · 17/12/2021 16:44

I think YABU to raise it with the milkman, he cannot be expected to walk around in the dark and if that is where your house is on the route then he can’t be expected to change that either.

I didn’t think people generally used the dogs as guard dogs at home. But if you do and cannot therefore train your dog, then you need to cancel the deliveries.

Wafflesnsniffles · 17/12/2021 20:10

Ours arrives at about 2:30am three times a week. Whether or not he uses a head torch (he does) he makes sufficient noise (cant be helped really) that a dog would wake up anyway. If a light would then the vehicle and the noise of the milk man fetching the empties, putting down the new ones would also wake a dog.

Why not just have it delivered once a week instead. Or have the dog sleep away from that side of the house.

thirddayout · 17/12/2021 20:26

If you cancel the milkman, don't be upset if for some reason you are unable to leave the house and have to do without milk for a while.

Suzanne999 · 17/12/2021 20:39

Can he just put the milk over your gate? Or leave at the end of your drive?

Bubblty · 17/12/2021 20:43

Get them some night vision goggles?

Paddingtonsmarmlade · 17/12/2021 20:49

You perfectly entitled to stop the milk delivery if it doesn't suit you. Is it possible for him to deliver further away ie to a box right by the gate/end of drive. Obviously only work if you're not straight of the pavement

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