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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To send DD to nursery on Christmas Eve?

201 replies

Iwantquavers · 17/12/2021 09:21

DD was a year old end of November and she goes to nursery FT. I’m a teacher and because of us being away on holiday for half term and for the first week of January, we haven’t actually had any time where she’s been in nursery and I’m off work - in other words, I’ve either been at work or had DD with me since starting in September.

This year we finish on the 23rd December. We get paid on the 25th, this year that’s a Saturday and Christmas Day anyway, so will be paid on the 24th. I really need to do some last minute shopping and it would be much faster and less stressful to do it without DD. I’m also genuinely wondering if she might prefer to be in nursery than in her pushchair going round the shops.

But I’m worried she’ll be the only baby there and the staff might prefer to be with their own families. Any thoughts?

OP posts:
Allthesefolks · 17/12/2021 11:42

I would if I was working the other days, my nursery is usually closed Christmas Eve but DC1 went on the days before even if I was off work so I could get all the Christmas prep done.

I was planning to do the same with DC2 this year so we can do some 1:1 things with DC1 as well as last minute jobs but alas COVID has closed nursery for the rest of the year.

SpringRainbow · 17/12/2021 11:54

I would do it. I get how sometimes it is just so much easier to get things done without children around.

I doubt she will be the only child there, but even if she was I am pretty sure she will have the time of her life. All the staff will be available to play with her one on one.

At the end of the day, if you were a baby what would you prefer? Being strapped in a pushchair all day or being made a fuss of in nursery?

SpiderinaWingMirror · 17/12/2021 11:56

I would and did send my kids on Xmas eve because of work! Usually had nursery asked a week before what people's plans were so they could sort out staff.

ChangeChingyChange · 17/12/2021 12:06

Op the reason why I asked if you're a single parent is because why haven't you had a single moment alone (either working or with DD) since September? What is your husband doing? And what's he doing on Christmas eve that your choice is either nursery or going shopping with you?

Original poster
Iwantquavers · 17/12/2021 12:09

The time I’ve had off we have either been on holiday as a family or at home as a family.

OP posts:
Original poster
Iwantquavers · 17/12/2021 12:09

He’s working Christmas Eve, his holiday starts on Christmas Day because I finish so late.

OP posts:
Danikm151 · 17/12/2021 12:17

You're allowed time for you too.
Xmas eve is a working day, DD will get to keep her routine and you can get some shopping done in relative peace.
Don't overthink it. If nursery is open, they will have the staff anyway.

My son will be in on xmas eve, I finish at 1. I'll go treat myself to a sit down and a coffee then collect him at 2/3.

BiddyPop · 17/12/2021 12:28

At 12 months, dd was cruising, a fast crawler, already a dab hand at opening drawers etc. I wouldn't get her to mix anything messy - but stirring dried spices and baking powder into flour I'd measured out or herbs into breadcrumbs - being right beside her to control any over-enthusiasm, was relatively normal.

It meant a lot more instruction and far slower prep than the previous year (she was still "cooking" at that stage). But yes, dd was involved as part of the family with DH and I doing the prep work as we always do on afternoon of 24th.

Partly she was being sent on little errands around the kitchen, partly she was in her high chair with things to do on the tray or pulled up to the worktop, and partly she was in her playpen with her toys out of the way while we worked.

As she got older, she stood on her steps at the worktop and could do messier jobs.

But things like minding a pile of carrots on her high chair table and handing over the next one for peeling when we were ready for it, putting a potato/carrot peeling that fell on the floor into the peelings bucket (to go to the food bin later), or putting the peeled potatoes into the empty pot (remembering not to fill with water until AFTER she did that to avoid mayhem!) were all jobs she could do at that stage.

And it also meant we could get on with jobs but she was part of it all. Playing music in the kitchen and all chatting, occasional dance, etc as we did it.

MrsToadflax · 17/12/2021 12:36

I wouldn't. I know Christmas Eve is technically a working day, but for a lot of people it is the start of Christmas and lots take the day off where possible. We all prep Christmas lunch, cook the ham, DC lay the Christmas table, we go to Christingle etc. DC have been involved since tiny, even if just playing with some dough, while I make actual edible food! It's always been a family day for me, so I wouldn't put DC in childcare if I wasn't at work.

ChiefWiggumsBoy · 17/12/2021 12:36

Shopping with a one year old is a pain in the arse when it’s not Xmas eve.

If nursery wanted they would close for the day - they aren’t, so put her in there and get done what you need to get done. Unlike other posters I don’t look back and feel bad that I sometimes put myself and convenience ahead of literally just being with my kid. You have the whole of the Christmas holidays to do that!

TuesdayRuby · 17/12/2021 12:39

Put her in OP! Like pp have said, it will be nice and relaxed for her, she’ll probably get loads of attention there. You can sort your shopping and definitely make time for a coffee and mince pie on your own!
Mine are going in on Christmas Eve too (I won’t be working but also have so much to do). I’ll pick them up early and we’ll do something festive together Smile

Original poster
Iwantquavers · 17/12/2021 12:40

I read things like that @BiddyPop and I honestly wonder if DD is a bit behind. I can’t get anything done when she’s around.

OP posts:
TuesdayRuby · 17/12/2021 12:53

@Iwantquavers my son is 22 months and he wouldn’t understand what I was talking about if I told him to “get the potatoes out the drawer” or “mix up the herbs and spices”. He’d more than likely start chewing on the raw potato or rub the spice mix into his eyes.
Your daughter sounds completely normal to me OP. My elder DD only really started to understand/help when she was about 2.5, and even that was for an attention span of about 5mins.

StillFestive · 17/12/2021 12:55

I wouldn’t say that means she is behind Iwantquavers, just different. Mine hated me being busy in the kitchen and wouldn’t have been happy sat in her highchair even if she was ‘helping’, she’d have wanted to be in my arms or round my ankles or directly involved in whatever we were doing. She’s always been fiercely independent so if she was doing something there’s no way she’d let me assist. She’d sit with a toy or something for 5 minutes but I’d have to stop whatever I was doing repeatedly. She’s 4 now and definitely not behind in any way. She can easily occupy herself when it suits her, but still isn’t remotely interested in helping with chores and it’s still easier to get things done when she’s not in the house.

I’m expecting DC2 imminently and hoping I get a nice chilled one this time that likes to help Grin

Original poster
Iwantquavers · 17/12/2021 13:03

Thanks, you’ve reassured me. I think if I gave her potato peelings to put in the bin she’d just eat them! Then throw them around!

OP posts:
sjxoxo · 17/12/2021 13:09

They might do some fun stuff on Xmas eve?! I’d be excited to send her if so 😁 xo

MaryShelley1818 · 17/12/2021 13:13

I personally wouldn't but Christmas Eve is really important to me, almost better than Christmas Day. We always have festive plans.
This year I've paid for both DS (4) and DD (10mths) to be at nursery BUT me and DH have both taken AL and we won't be sending them in. I just wouldn't want to not be with my children on Christmas Eve (I also either work or have the children as I expect lots of people do).

Dyra · 17/12/2021 13:17

We're sending DD! It's only a half day, but they're going to be doing some fun activities and have a Christmas lunch. I have to work (healthcare), but at least DH will have the morning off to get things ready for me that I couldn't the day before.

Toottooot · 17/12/2021 13:22

My child has just turned 2 and has no clue about Christmas - I will be happily sending them to nursery on Christmas Eve morning with zero feelings of guilt. If that makes me a shit parent then so be it! 💁🏻‍♀️

BiddyPop · 17/12/2021 13:37

Getting dd involved at that age were instructions like "stir this with your spoon", "put this in the bowl/bin there" while putting this in her hand or pointing at it on the floor and pointing to the bowl/bin, "put that into your pot" as I handed that to her, "are you still minding my carrots, can I have another one please" and putting my hand out to her...

And probably having a supply of chunks of pepper or supply of chocolate buttons to distract her when needed.

Definitely not "now, you measure 2 cups of flour and stir the cinnamon and ginger into the flour there"...type of instructions 🤣

Lillyhatesjaz · 17/12/2021 13:51

Just don't turn up to collect her really drunk having spent the whole afternoon in the pub
(Speaking from experience)

SpringRainbow · 17/12/2021 14:05

I have two kids, one kid was quite happy to ‘help’ me from a young age so I had no problem getting them ‘involved’ with things like cooking.

The other would have destroyed the kitchen and then thrown a massive tantrum.

All children are different. Don’t worry OP.

JustWonderingIfYou · 17/12/2021 14:28

It sounds a bit sad tbh. Nursery on Xmas eve when you're around.

She's only 1! Not sure how many "days off" without her you need after only a year. Especially as it sound like you and her dad are working full time. I would prefer to have her with me.

On the helping front ds definitely would have been useless at anything other than throw this flour across the counter at 12 months. At 24 months, he is pretty good at mixing, putting things in the rubbish, loves cleaning up and fetching. She doesn't sound behind at all

HairyScaryMonster · 17/12/2021 14:57

The main thing for the nursery staff is for you to pick up early if you can. Going in is not a problem and I'm sure she won't be the only one there.

Christmas1988 · 17/12/2021 14:57

I’m surprised your nursery is even open! How lucky are you! You can always pick her up early, she doesn’t need to stay all day.