To ask what you do at the weekends? (Sober!)

[NewlySober]

I’m newly sober - not an alcoholic as such, but a big weekend drinker who’s life kinda revolved around partying at the end of every week. A problem drinker I guess.

Realising this wasn’t really where I wanted to be in life, I decided to go sober 2 weeks ago (yay) and am enjoying all the benefits that come with it.

I originally made a list of all the fun sober things I wanted to do in place of my usual weekend drinking but so many of them are becoming more difficult with Covid restrictions.

I know it seems so sad and pathetic not to know what to do with myself but I’d love some inspiration. I live just outside of London but wary of going into busy nightlife areas until I’ve been sober for longer.

What do you do at the weekends? Thank you

Going out in the morning is the thing! I have a semi commitment to help a relative which I combine with a swim, coffee and shopping. If I am not meeting them then I'd do a class, meet a friend for a coffee, a random mooch. Things like matinees are brilliant, a show then meal or vice versa and home by 10! I find having one commitment is good, it really helps anchor my weekend.

Sundays...maybe a walk but to be honest I tend to spend it planning the week ahead, and cooking/eating nice food, speaking to family.

Meet family, go shopping, go for meals - weekends away etc. All while with very little to drink (I'll probably have a glass of wine with a meal)

It’s more awkward with Covid and cold winter weather isn’t it? Anything that is often done with booze can be done without it. If you want to avoid booze though, you could go to the gym, walk in woodland or by the sea (I have dogs, you could borrow one or go alone or with a friend), take up running (couch to 5K?), swimming, yoga, visit a museum maintaining social distance and wearing a mask. Share a meal at home and a bit of Netflix with a friend who will happily do that without drinking, go out for a meal and the cinema with aforementioned friend, knitting, adult colouring etc, etc.

Gym and then swim.
Nice walk that feels like an achievement.
Long bath and a book.
Crafts - currently sewing a quilt.
I love the cinema.
Planning and cooking a nice meal.
Organising something like a drawer or a cupboard.
Going to a gallery.

I presume you just mean the evening and know that obviously you can fill the daytime with housework errands, shopping, exercise, visiting friends/family etc.

What about - cinema or theatre show, meal out to a restaurant with a good range of mocktails, night in with a movie/series and snacks, reading a good book, trying out a fancy new recipe for a late dinner, a long soak in the tub, watch whatever dross is on itv at primetime, nighttime walk with partner

Day or night really! I know it sounds so pathetic but my Friday nights were always drinking and then recovering all of Saturday that I feel like I have all of this free and precious time back, and I really want to use it well.

Great suggestions so far, thank you. Agree winter plus Covid has made it more difficult to find things to do but some good ideas here.

Yes I agree with other posters starting Saturday morning with the gym too definitely a great alcohol free weekend activity

Everyman cinema membership. I love films.

A pile of books and a notebook next to the bed for a lazy Saturday morning. A workout. Go for a walk, feed some ducks, pick up brunch. Day time tidy up. An afternoon film. A bath, an early night with books again.

Coffee meet ups brunch & walks, cinema nights good luck on your journey x

Long dog walk, coffee with friends, crafting at home, movie night, read my book, national trust visit, play board games, catch up on garden jobs (grow our own fruit and veg) write in my journal, waste time on mumsnet. Good luck

Thank you - I think ‘waste time on Mumsnet’ is becoming a big one already haha

Ooh, do a course! I'd absolutely love Friday night & Saturday, I would do life drawing, singing lessons, stand up comedy, join a sports club and get really fit...go to a therapy group and enjoy giving myself some needed time and attention. It's all hard with covid but some things are online and will come back after Xmas. Well done and good luck for your sobriety.

I get up relatively early and usually go to London and walk around, walk around the parks, go to museums, cinemas, go to South Bank
. There is do much to do !

I don’t really drink much - most of my social plans aren’t around drinking.

Do you enjoy/might you enjoy exercise? Quite a lot of my weekend it taken up by exercise - over lockdown I started outdoor swimming (like loads of other people) so for me a Saturday might be getting to a local wild swimming spot, a cold swim, then getting a hot chocolate to warm up. That can easily take half the day. Or I’ll go for a long run - on a sunny Sunday morning I love to go out for an hour or two then have a nice hot bath and chill out afterwards.

I also meet friends more for brunch/lunch than evenings - or friends with small kids we meet for a coffee/walk in the park with the kids.

If you’re near London you could plan daytime stuff like visiting a museum or exhibition or similar. Or something like go to a food market like Borough and then a walk along the river.

In the evenings - do you like to cook? Me and DH both love food and cooking so can take a lot of time over making something nice on weekend evenings. Or go out just to eat.

Cinema or theatre can be a great non-drinking evening option as well.

My favourite thing to do on non hungover Saturdays is get up to do parkrun with friends and then celebrate the achievement with a nice brunch.

I stopped drinking about six months ago for similar reasons and can confirm sober life is great :)

At weekends I go for walks, swim, coffee with friends, poke around the shops, visit National Trust places / museums, do professional study.

In the evenings I mostly sit and chill on the sofa but also go out for dinner, gigs, theatre. Listen to the radio, watch TV, play board games with DH or Mario Kart with the DC!

I don't need to now, but when I first stopped drinking I had a lot of baths to break the evening glass of wine habit. Treated myself to some Champneys bath foam and lined up some podcasts / audio books.

I have a toddler so my options are very child focussed but I'll try to help anyway!

Walks in nice places, combined with a coffee stop and ideally a chat with a friend
The gym
Other sorts of exercise classes if you aren't into the gym, like yoga or burlesque or whatever
Reading
Going out for food and exploring my cities foodie culture
Coffee with friends
Taking myself out for coffee and cake with a book (starting to see a theme here!)
Netflix
Sometimes something crafty
Pottery workshops at a local pottery cafe

Think about a hobby or interest you'd like to take up, the most successful I've ever been at giving up things is replacing them with something else.
Could be gym, yoga, running, reading, swimming, learn a language, knitting, cooking, doesn't matter what just that you enjoy it and want to be fit to do it at the weekend so the temptation of just going for a few on a Friday night is lessened.
Good luck 🍀

Friends round for dinner usually twice, or we go to theirs. We don’t really drink much as people are usually driving but I think it would be easy to not drink at all.
Church
Usually a national trust trip with friends and/or DH or something similar - brunch and art gallery etc
I’m doing an MA so I try and have one study day and one day off. DH will do a bike ride with friends or his club if I’m working.
Gardening/baking/ painting. I love making stuff and we both like playing around with art stuff.
Volunteering with Childline.

When I was single I did a lot of cheap train trips. So I’d set a budget and either find a train trip to somewhere I hadn’t been or a cheap local train and money for lunch (or packed lunch). I’d wander round, look in charity shops, listen to podcasts etc.

Maybe think about hobbies and how you can spend more time doing them- a friend entered a charity swim recently because she enjoys it and had more time. Another learnt the piano!!

I work shifts, so I don't usually get weekends off

However, I was off last weekend, so these are some of the things that I've done

Wrapped some Xmas presents & wrote some cards & posted some gifts

Went to a city, via the trian to visit the Christmas markets & see the Christmas lights.

Visited a local place to look for some hand made craft Xmas presents & take some Christmas themed photos

Visited local town & bought some items from charity shops & market

Fed the ducks in the park

I start my weekend with gym, swim and a sauna

The best drink that I had that weekend ?

Was a hot chocolate, in a (non Costa) cafe while waiting for the train after visiting the Christmas markets.

Work, exercise, clean, drink coffee, read the paper, watch strictly. Rock and roll.