AIBU? Christmas mental load

[DBI78]

How do you guys share the additional Xmas mental load? I work 10 hours a work plus at home with ds. Oh works 40 hours a week plus 90min commute.
OH todo list-
My pressies and card
His parents pressie
Our ds main pressie
Wrap my pressies and sign card
My list -
Oh pressies
Ds other pressies
2 x dd pressies
My dad
Sil + bil
5 x nieces and nephews
My sister
Teachers
School club
Dog walker
All cards
Order food
Wrap all pressies
Plus much more I'm sure!!
The think is I can ask him to do more but I have to send links or he will need me to tell him exactly what to do.
What's your households like?

I work 20 hours a week, plus all kid duties, washing, cleaning, cooking etc.
He works 35 hours a week self employed.
I do everything Christmas related except buy gifts for his mum and dad.

DH does everything to do with his family for birthdays and Christmas. If he is late or forgets it's not my problem. I don't even know when the birthdays are. One of his sisters once suggested I help him out (she does everything) I just laughed. I also have the very useful theory that as he is a Christian and I'm an atheist, if he wants Christmas to be celebrated he needs to crack on. Now the DC are adults I'm not especially bothered about it. I have a long term plan to phase it out as far as possible.

I work 40+ hours a week and am a single parent with a dog to walk so I downscale what I do.

Presents for immediate family and basic Xmas food and decoration.

I don't do cards, I don't do gifts for extended friendship group or teachers or what-not.

I start in September and have everything wrapped by mid Dec. Fake tree. No elaborate outside lights. No elf on the shelf, my Xmas eve boxes, a chocolate advent calendar.

It sounds like a misery but it really isn't! We enjoy Xmas themed craft, weekend outings, dark walks to see the village lights. We watch Xmas movies. December is full of fun but I keep committing myself to unnecessary work to a minimum.