What was the shittest present you ever received?

[BrightonOrLancaster]

Christmas I was 13, got a lacy training bra from an aunt I wasnt close to. WTF? I had to open it in front of family, was fucking mortified.

Birthday present from ex: dumbbells with flashing colour changing lights from ALDI. Lol. No comment

Husband bought me nose plugs for him to wear to help him stop snoring. Maybe the sentiment was kind but imagine unwrapping a present and it’s nose plugs.

Typewriter from my parents for my 21st.
Told them I didn't want it..
I was LIVID.

I'd bought my boyfriend at the time aftershave and a gold eyebrow bar.

He gave me £10 in a card. Not even a personal card. One from a multipack he'd pinched from his mum!

A personalised pen from FIL & his wife. With the wrong name on.

One third of a Mars bar, from my late shitty grandmother who despised me.

Ten years ago..8 months pregnant and an ex got me absolutely nothing (claimed to be skint) but got himself a new ear piercing on my birthday. Even his best mate got me chocolates and looked genuinely sad for me. Yes I finished with him immediately

My ex was the best (or should that be worst) at disappointing gifts. He often went out on the day to buy last minute presents (the pack of cheap biscuits for one Valentine's Day was a great example) so Christmas when he actually planned ahead should have been better but rarely was.

One year he told me I was getting something sparkly. Of course I expected jewellery. It was the tackiest fucking plastic silver-coloured rubber duck shaped money box.

Then our last Christmas together, I'd found a receipt for a lovely expensive scarf and gloves set and some jewellery (earrings and a bracelet). He did an Alan Rickman in Love Actually to me. I opened my gift of cheap slipper socks and knew it was over. He wasn't even with the other woman, she already had a partner and he was trying to win her over instead.

Thankfully DH is much better at gifts so it's been many years since I had a bad gift.

A Homer Simpson soap on a rope that looked used.

A tax disc holder... after they abolished the need for them

A spa day for me and my friend

Only:

1. I hate spa days

1. There was no voucher or anything, it was a spur of the moment "oh shit I haven't got a present, let me promise something" thing

1. It was from DP, we pool our money so it was effectively asking me to spend my own money on a spa day I didn't want. And, about 3 x the price of what we usually spend on presents.

1. DP never actually made any arrangements, so as well as having to effectively buy it myself, I'd have to research and arrange it myself too

The thing that pissed me off the most is I hate spa days. and DP should have known that. At least if he was going to suggest I arrange and pay for my own present it better not be an expensive waste of money on something I don't want.

Worst present ever. It was never mentioned again.

DP can be quite generous and thoughtful, he's not always so shit! He's got me some lovely gifts over the years. I don't know what happened that day.

Sadly too many
A tacky jewellery box years ago - what made it worse was DP of the time was best friends with DP of my best friend - they shopped together and we each got a shit present
Nearly 40 years later - they are both toast and we are still friends!

The tiger fleece jacket. I had mentioned that I could do with a warm fleece top. However the item I unwrapped on xmas day was... spectacular!

Oh and the 'Very best of Celine Dion' CD from dh. I had never expressed an interest in said singer

That was the first year we were together... 32 years later I tell him exactly what I want for Xmas and usually order it myself!!!!

A Second hand jewellery box...with no jewellery in it. I thought for a second he was going to propose. So embarrassed as I opened it in front of his family and it was written all over my face.
Weirdly I found said box in the attic today. Yea we’re still together

Aftershave and car mats from my DH!
He meant well but got sold the aftershave instead of the perfume he wanted for me cos he was scared of the ‘orange lady’ in Debenhams😀
The car mats were quite a good prezzie… he’d had to order them and they were lovely (and expensive) Sadly they barely lasted 12 months.
They matched the car polisher he’d bought me for my birthday a few weeks earlier…the damn thing vibrated so much, it felt like my teeth were coming out!😄

@mara263 ... So thats where my DH got the idea from! My DH is normally brilliant at buying gifts. We went on a pre Christmas visit to Munich to visit my BIL, also good at gift buying. So when they announced they were going off Christmas shopping together, I had high hopes. Sadly, I ended up with a credit card multi tool thing from BIL because he thought it was ingenious, and a fossilised sharks tooth stuck on a safety pin from DH. He explained that he thought it would make a unique piece of jewellery. I was not impressed!

For my 30th my ex husband gave me two pound coins taped inside a A4 piece of paper folded to make a 'card'
Then he had a huge meltdown when I wasn't grateful for all the effort he put in!
Especially as he had spent all his wages on
porn as apparently free porn isn't as good so I was lucky to have his last £2.
Thank goodness he's an ex

I get used things or usually just one very very obviously cheap thing from the richest friend I have. Sad thing is she is actually my best friend of 20 years. I'm not expecting her to spend a fortune on me but even something that cost a fiver would be nice!

Christmas gift from an in-law to-be. It was for my wedding night. By pure luck my parents were not in the room when it was opened. My DSis and DF (fiancé not father!) were equally perplexed then very, very entertained.

Some screwdrivers.
Not a set, just some screwdrivers.
Because I had remarked that I couldn't find a screwdriver, several months before.

Different ex bought me a tacky schoolgirl uniform, that was 4 sizes too small (and I am a 10ish) and wondered why I wasn't thrilled.

That year my brother gave me a signed first edition of a favourite childhood book...the then boyfriend sulked because I cried at that present but not his...

My nan have me an empty wicker flower basket from the charity shop for my 10th birthday and lavender scented drawer salts.

I was perplexed at why she thought i- a very tomboyish girl wanted either!

A pair of socks that were two sizes too small, having messaged me in the summer asking if I'd bought and sent them to her (I hadn't and I knew they were the same ones as they had a distinctive character's face on them).

Same friend bought half a bottle of opened wine to our joint best friend's wedding as a wedding gift.

A work colleague bought me a perfume gift set from Boots one year. It was something like 5 tiny bottles of perfume in a box. Every single one of them smelled like cat's piss. Needless to say, I never wore any of them.

Paul McKenna's Think Yourself Slim book from (thankfully now ex) MIL.
DS1 was 4 months old, and I was back in my size 12 jeans

For my birthday, I was 34 weeks pregnant. My dm sent me a size 18 nightdress she had received from my aunt for her birthday in May.
At full term I weighed 10st. My mil same birthday gave me a size 8 half slip.
I told them both what I thought.

My dm has form for putting me last though.
One Christmas as a teenager, 17, she hinted that I and dsis had got an extra gift each. I opened the gift I was expecting, nothing else. My dsis got her gift plus a lovely bottle of perfume.
I was puzzled and dm said oh, you have gifts from bf’s family so I’ve given extra gift to dsil.
That set a pattern for the next 44 years and counting with my dm.
When dh and I bought our lovely home my dm said it wasn’t fair as my db couldn’t afford such a nice home and he is cleverer than my dh.
(Not that clever, obviously).

Christmas 2019 from MIL - she even went througn the effort of mailing it, a literal plastic red bath robe, it was so cheap and itchy
My birthday 2021 from some friends - voucher from a place I never shop and out of date chocolate box