to put a complaint in about my pre term birth

[Candyss]

hello,

my son was born at 27 weeks, completely unexpectedly. he came home 2 weeks ago and, aside from requiring a bit of home oxygen, has as far as we can tell come out fairly okay.

Now everything has settled down and we are out of the neonatal unit I'm starting to feel a lot of anger towards the situation.

I went in the day before I had him with bleeding. I was left for over 3 hours, was briefly checked and told no active bleeding, cervix closed and sent on my way, assured that it was normal to bleed occasionally in the second/third trimester. no scan or anything. their test to check for pre term labour also came back negative which they assured me meant I would definitley not be having my baby in the next 2 weeks.

the following day, I woke up with a lot of back pain. I rung up, again assured this is a normal part of pregnancy and putting extra weight on etc. due to this and the tests and checks day before, I ignored the pain until it got to 7pm and I was in so much agony I could barely walk. my dad rushed me to the hospital, although the hospital actually told me they were busy and to wait until 9pm. I couldnt wait. when I got there, they made me walk down the corridor to do a urine sample, then told me I was fine and had a urine infection, that was all. they said they would check the baby just to be sure. hooked up - baby fine. doctor eventually comes round to check me out and low and behold. my cervix is totally gone and my son is breech - they can see the water bag with his feet in it and I will be having my son that night, which I did via emergency c section.

He was whisked off to another hospital at a more intensive unit. I was put on a ward at the hospital I'd given birth in. when I came round from recovery I'd been put on a ward with other mums who all had their full term babies with them. I didnt even know if my son was okay.

I just feel so sad and let down now. I don't know why they didnt listen to me when I called, I dont know why they didnt scan me or check me properly the day I went in with bleeding. I didnt even have time to have the steroids to help his lungs. I'm not saying they could of stopped me having him early or that we would have got to full term. but atleast I could of had the steroids earlier. atleast they could of prolonged it.

my partner wants to put in a complaint but I dont know if it's worth doing. it wont change what happened :'(

@Submariner

What I can tell you is that steroids need to be given quite sometime before birth to make any difference. I don’t know how long but it’s definitely more than a few hours and could be days. There is also nothing they can do to stop you going into labour or even prolong it (unless things have radically changed)

While I agree with this poster that premature birth takes a long time to process, and that you should be kind to yourself as it was out of your hands, I'm sorry but I'd have to disagree with this part. I think the intent is really important, so they could have at least started with some measures like steroids just in case it helped. Also, I would argue the aim would be to slow down or pause labour if possible. I had a stitch put in 10 years ago when I was 6cm dilated that bought us about a week. I also had progesterone which was to slow labour. It was still an awful outcome in the end, but I'm sure it meant one of my sons survived, and it gave time for me to have the steroid injections. While it may not be possible to work miracles, I think there's a big gap between sending the OP home in a dismissive manner, to at least chucking everything they had in their toolkit at it.

I suppose my point is that it isn't OP's job to know exactly what medical help should have been available to her. I wouldn't go into the complaints process thinking there was nothing they could do, now OP has made a complaint I would be asking them what is their best practice and what they should have been doing.

to all the families on this thread who've been through these truly crappy experiences though. It's awful in different ways for different people.

*steroid tablets! Facepalm! I wasn't training for the olympics at the time.

Always listen to your body
Always push to be heard !!
Especially when pregnant . Hospitals are the worst. Especially for pregnant women. Everything is labeled as "oh well that is just part of being pregnant " :(
Always push. Always speak up. And demand to be seen/heard.

Weve all learned that the hard way i feel :(

I dont think a complaint will help you nor anyone else really. There was no negligence or something like that. So it sounds like a nice dream if the system would change after your complaint,but we all know that that aint happening... :(
But if you feel like complaining would help your mh, you should

I just want an acknowledgement really. pregnant women are treated appallingly tbh. so dismissed and treated like they are stupid/hysterical.

@Candyss

I just want an acknowledgement really. pregnant women are treated appallingly tbh. so dismissed and treated like they are stupid/hysterical.

Yes they are. There are some awful, mysogynistic attitudes towards pregnant women and I honestly believe it all goes back to sex. Like, "Well of course it hurts you silly girl, if you didn't want a painful birth you should have kept your legs closed."

Nothing like your experience but I was given a pessary when induced and told I'd be checked in 12 hours. I gave birth about 3 hours later. They only agreed to check me because I lied and said his movements had stopped. Surprise - I was fully dilated!

@Candyss

I just want an acknowledgement really. pregnant women are treated appallingly tbh. so dismissed and treated like they are stupid/hysterical.

That's perfectly reasonable, but also, it will help other women and babies because now that you've complained they should look at what happened and learn from it.

I'm sorry you had such an awful experience. I agree with others who say that counselling could help you too, it's no small thing you've been through.

I'm so sorry OP.

I have no advice on how or when to report, but I found after a difficult experience a 'meet the matron' session helped. I got to talk through what happened during my birth from my hospital notes, got to ask questions about why each thing happened and basically settle with myself why it went wrong. She aknowledged my feelings, took on board my feedback and I felt so much better for it. If you're not ready to report your experience, it might be a good step just for you. Speak to your midwife about it to check your hospital do it, or something similar.
You're not stupid or hysterical, and you deserved better. x

I spoke to my midwife today. she is going to arrange for me to have a briefing with the consultant who delivered my son to find out what happened and hopefully why. I think I need it otherwise I dont think the anger will go away.

Speak to PALS. Put in a formal complaint

@Candyss

Please be aware that debriefs are an arse covering exercise used to mitigate the risk of complaints.

They will try to blame you, you weren't concise enough about your symptoms, you didn't explain full how bad the pain was, you misunderstood what the midwife meant.

Go into it with your eyes open to the fact that they'll try to convince you anything and everything but they did wrong.

I've spoken to a friend of mine who is a solicitor and she thinks I've got grounds to go further than just a complaint. I'm a bit nervous to go down the legal route but the reality is my son could of died had I not listed to my own instincts and gone in.

Ask gp to refer you for a de brief. I found mine useful was with a specialist midwife. Then make a complaint if you feel you should after that.

I have a debrief arranged for beginning of next week and a meeting with solicitors tomorrow morning.

@Candyss

Don't let them know at thd debrief you've informed solicitors, and get a full copy of your notes before you tell them.

I cant tell you how commonly notes are mislaid, lost, when someone complains.

Just seen this thread and the update - was going to suggest solicitors so really glad you have a meeting to explore any possible claim.

Use the anger to get the complaint written. It will definitely make you feel better and hopefully will prevent the same thing happening to someone else.

I finally received a response to my complaint and I am so upset

they have said that the fetal fibronectin test wasnt actually done (the test to see if you will give birth in the next 2 weeks) and they can only apologise for the miscommunication.

it is the sole reason that when I started getting back pain the following morning that I held off going straight back in initially as they told me this test was negative which meant I would not be having a baby in the next 2 weeks and even if it had come back positive it didnt mean I for sure would but they would keep an eye on me.

I dont know what to do. them telling me that test was negative really impacted my actions in the 24 hours that followed. I dont see how an apology can possibly make up for it.

so I assumed it was normal third trimester pain and was not concerned until it got to a point where it was bad and I knew something more must be going on. had they actually done the test it would have come back positive.

the consequences of them not doing the test at all and telling me they had but it had come back negative have been tremendous.

You should absolutely complain! I’m sorry you had such a bad experience, good to hear your son is home & doing well

I would write a complaint. I don't see why not? Like what's the worst that can happen?

oh, just saw your update. Ignore my comment.

So sorry it happened :(
Will talking to a lawyer be of any use? Maybe you can sue them.

I'm so sorry that happened to you op that's really unforgivable. 'Miscommunication'? Lie more like.
How's your son doing now? My friend had a 23 weeker, he's 7 now

Please put in a complaint, it will help you get some sort of closure and hopefully move on from the awful situation you were put in.

I had my twins at 33 weeks, they were whisked away to neo natal straight away. I was put on a ward with the other mums who all had their babies. In the night I was put next to the scum of the earth who kept leaving their baby in the middle of the night to go and have a fag.

When my babies were 3 days old I had shuffled out of bed, got the lift up 2 floors and then shuffled along to the neo natal door. When the receptionist let me in I heard her say to her colleague "one of those twins has taken a turn for the worse in the night" I swear I could have fainted there and then. I was indeed one of my girls who was having difficulty breathing and they suspected sepsis. Nobody had come to get me, no one had communicated that with me whilst I was on the ward from hell.

It played on my mind for months and months after, and I really wish I'd made a complaint, I think it would have helped me move on, rather than running over the details again and again in my head.

I'm really sorry you went through all you did, it really sounds awful, but glad to hear your little boy is doing well xxxx

Please do complain. I think us women accept far too much, and we get mistreated and minimised withing healthcare over all, but especially when it comes to childbirth. The only reason for that is that men don't give birth.

Hi, sorry to hear what happened to you OP. Birth can be traumatic at the best of times and yours was extra stressful.
I agree with making a complaint, often departments welcome these as it is evidence they can take to their managers when submitting a case for more staff.
Remember we are in a pandemic, many staff are probably off sick and maternity units have been short staffed for years. The staff are working in very difficult circumstances. Most maternity staff are highly skilled and qualified but when short staffed they cannot give the care they want to.
Looking at the bigger picture, you might also want to write to the chief exec of the hospital asking them how they plan to improve maternity care. You may also want to write to your MP about your case and requesting that they support the training and recruitment of more midwives and funding hospitals better.
Again, I'm so sorry you went through this and I hope, in time, you will recover. Be kind to yourself and I hope you get some answers 💐

I am pleased that you have been to a solicitor. You may not want to get money out of them, but money is what is used to keep the score!
Suing them will make them focus a bit more on the problems that they caused.
You may have had non standard conditions but they should have picked up on them, they were not exceptional, not the first time that those nurses and doctors had faced them.
They must be brought to face their actions each time it happens.