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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Boyfriend offering to work Christmas ...

45 replies

richiebxxx · 10/12/2021 18:12

Just me and my boyfriend this year.
He is working Christmas Eve 9am till 11 pm
Off Christmas Day
Boxing Day 9 am -1 am
Nye-12 pm-1am
Nyd 9am -10 pm

He was meant to be off nye but his friend who has kids asked would he do his shift and he agreed

Aibu to be a bit annoyed?
I'm gonna be alone most of the time

OP posts:
ForensicFlossy · 10/12/2021 18:16

Is he getting paid extra for working bank hols? If I had no dc I would definitely pick up those hours.

Original poster
richiebxxx · 10/12/2021 18:37

No,no extra
Normal hourly rate

OP posts:
Cocomarine · 10/12/2021 18:37

Why would you be alone most of the time?
I’d find it quite claustrophobic if my boyfriend didn’t like me working because they’d otherwise be alone and didn’t like that. (fine if alone and happy with it)

Cocomarine · 10/12/2021 18:38

Those are some crazy long shifts though! Do you really mean 9am to 1am?

LittleDandelionClock · 10/12/2021 18:40

Why is he not getting extra for Boxing day? What does he do?

LittleDandelionClock · 10/12/2021 18:41

@Cocomarine

Those are some crazy long shifts though! Do you really mean 9am to 1am?
I assume OP must mean 9am to 1pm.

a 16 hour shift is against the law. Nobody could be or SHOULD be expected or made to do that.

LittleDandelionClock · 10/12/2021 18:41

By that I mean a 16 hour shift!

RallySooney · 10/12/2021 18:42

I think the big issue here is he's working all those days and hours and not being paid extra!

Cocomarine · 10/12/2021 18:43

@LittleDandelionClock normally I’d assume a mistake, but the other shifts are 14, 13 and 13 hours! So I wondered if there were split shifts going on with boyfriend not available in between. Hence I thought it was worth asking if it really was 16 hours, 9am to 1am!

Cocomarine · 10/12/2021 18:45

If he usually makes time for your relationship, but wants money, I don’t think he should turn them down just to save you from having to entertain yourself. So it depends what he’s usually like!

Sirzy · 10/12/2021 18:50

Where does he work?

I am guessing hospitality?

Some jobs working Christmas comes with the territory. Can you not make plans with friends now?

DogInATent · 10/12/2021 19:08

@richiebxxx

No,no extra Normal hourly rate
You might want to point out to him that if this is part of the normal shift rotation (not unusual) then the premium has been built into the salary. Direct swapping of the awkward shifts is indirectly giving his mate a significant cash present. Pretty sure when it's his turn to do this shifts on the natural rotation the mate will still have kids.

Btw, 16hr cover shifts aren't unusual. Less common these days, but on a 8hr shift rotation covering the shift after yours was a done thing. But only for overtime.

WonderfulYou · 10/12/2021 19:22

I think YABU

You don’t have children and lots of jobs need to work over the holidays.

Christmas is just a date on the calendar and you can celebrate it on a different day.

Do you have any family or friends you could visit or invite over if you don’t want to be alone?

SmellyOldOwls · 10/12/2021 19:24

He's off on Christmas Day, you can't expect him not to work at all over Christmas- maybe he needs the money.

FoxIvy · 10/12/2021 19:26

I think it's late on for him to change the plan if it leaves you alone. Can you travel to be with friends/family for a few days? As you say you'll barely see him anyway.

Whaleandsnail6 · 10/12/2021 19:37

I think if you had planned to spend new years eve together then he is unreasonable to have picked up a shift that he didn't originally have to do.

We both work in jobs that require us to work over new years/Christmas and I'd be a bit upset if my oh picked up an extra shift when we could be having time off together on one of those days/ nights

RodneyIsDave · 10/12/2021 19:39

Not your place to tell him when he can and cannot work. Perhaps he wants extra money, or likes his job.

Original poster
richiebxxx · 10/12/2021 19:40

It's hospitality and yes it's 16 hour shifts
They think because he is child less he can do all the hours under the sun

OP posts:
girlmom21 · 10/12/2021 19:41

He's off on Christmas Day.
Don't you have friends or family you can spend some time with?

PigeonLittle · 10/12/2021 19:41

Yanbu, i would have been sad if my husband worked most of Christmas snd new year.

sst1234 · 10/12/2021 19:45

He’s doing his friend a favour. Maybe his friend picks up shifts he doesn’t want to work. What’s wrong with that.

DorothyZbornakIsAQueen · 10/12/2021 19:45

It sounds like that's how his shifts have fell and the only extra one he offered to do if for a friend.

My husband is working night shift Xmas eve and Xmas day.

It's how his shifts have fallen and he won't be paid extra.

Butchyrestingface · 10/12/2021 19:51

Nye-12 pm-1am
Nyd 9am -10 pm

Hope the poor guy lives near to his work? That's only 8 hours between the end of one shift and beginning of the next. Sad

CheesyFootballsAreEvil · 10/12/2021 19:53

@richiebxxx

It's hospitality and yes it's 16 hour shifts They think because he is child less he can do all the hours under the sun
It's his choice though. He can say no.
ImInStealthMode · 10/12/2021 19:53

I'd be a bit put out too OP, but I think it would depend how long we'd been together, if we lived together etc.

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