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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think it sad that such young children are being bought such grown-up presents?

265 replies

allIWannaBeForChristmas · 18/12/2007 11:49

partly brought on by the other thread, but have heard from so many people who are buying their 4/5/6 yo's games consoles/televisions/dvd players and even know of one who has bought her 7 yo a mobile phone.

am I the only one that thinks this is wrong?

OP posts:
Hulababy · 19/12/2007 10:00

I mean control in a loose sense. In the same way that I control when paint can come out in my house, or play doh. Or when I can cope with Hama Beads all over the place. Yes some toys she has complete free access. Maybe I am just lucky that although DD does have access to these things - computer, games console, TV in living room - I don't have to constantly nag her about them. She dips in and out of them. They are always available but she maybe just isn't the kind to get obsessed or fixated. Who knows. She has spent the last two hours playing Polly Pocket. She is now listening to music and dancing in her room. Later we will go to soft play to meet a friend for lunch. Then wimming Then a sleep over at a friends. Chances are there will be no games console all day. But lots of other nice play. It's just another toy that adds to her variety for us.

Hulababy · 19/12/2007 10:02

Mrne - is that "Imagine: Babies" - if so it is actually aimed at slightly older children, a bit like the Catz and Dogz type games.

Marne · 19/12/2007 10:06

Thats the one Hulababy

I did'nt see the age range but it was shown on TV whilst pre-scool programs were being shown.

TodayToday · 19/12/2007 10:08

"Then wimming" Now there's an activity we don't do enough of. Wimming. Sounds fun

I'm still with you MP. We don't have any toys in the house that I'd have to be concerned over if DD decided to play with it all weekend.

manchita · 19/12/2007 11:00

Doesn't everyone know that the real damage here is caused by and kind of screentime? Esp. in young children it actually effects the way they absorb information-i.e not doscovering for themselves, but watching other people do teaches tham nothing.
I am sure we have all seen that dead-eye look when they have soent to long looking at a screen

TheIceQueen · 19/12/2007 11:03

I'd be slightly concerned if my DS's played with any one of there (plentiful) toys for the entire weekend - I think variety is important and sitting down doing dot-to-dots (DS1's other great passion) all weekend isn't really stretching his imagination and creativity in any shape or form.

TheIceQueen · 19/12/2007 11:04

no Manchita - I've never noticed a "dead-eye" look when they've spent a long time looking at a screen, but then they never sit and stare at a screen all day.

I Have however seen it on DH, who can get completely absorbed in watching TV/playing the PS2..........funnily enough he didn't have either as a child......

manchita · 19/12/2007 11:06

Hello Icey
But adults brains are fully developed

manchita · 19/12/2007 11:07

If they have TV in their rooms and they play in them all day how do you moniter screen time?

TheIceQueen · 19/12/2007 11:11

"adults brains are fully developed"

well sometimes I have my doubts about that

We only have a TV in the DS's room hooked up for the playstation/DVD's. All games and DVD's are kept downstairs - so if they want to play on them they have to come and get them.....which means that we know when they're starting playing (although both they usually still have to ask for permission before doing so anyhow). They're also under the threat of death (well not really ) that as soon as they've finished with the game/dvd it's put back into its box and put back on the shelf......so obviously if they haven't appeared back downstairs with it within what we consider a reasonable time - we go upstairs and tell them.

manchita · 19/12/2007 11:17

Ice - You sound like a very sensible mummy and I would have no concern for your dc but do you admit there is a problem with these dc getting these type of things far too young and speding all day on them to keep them out of the way?

JoDeeMagi · 19/12/2007 11:17

Sort of agree with OP, DS (7) currently only has cd/radio in his bedroom, but uses Playstation downstairs. He will be getting (as per his Wish List) a DS Lite, but also as per his List a Monopoly set (Star Wars) and Quick Chess, so swings and roundabouts ...

TheIceQueen · 19/12/2007 11:55

"but do you admit there is a problem with these dc getting these type of things far too young and speding all day on them to keep them out of the way?"

yes BUT I think it's more of a wider parenting problem than a problem with gamestations/tvs in bedrooms per se.

I know of parents whose children don't have TV's or Gamestations in their bedroom - but still get put upstairs to play in their room to keep them out of the way - as opposed to the child actually wanting to play in their room.

tortoiseSHELL · 19/12/2007 12:02

Actually, I do think they can be dangerous - I know a boy who spent 4 days in hospital after suffering a major fit (he was not epileptic btw) after playing playstation for 8 hours. Now obviously that is extreme, but I do know it was extremely scary, and for at least a couple of hours they couldn't control the fit. They also couldn't prove it was because of the playstation, but the doctors said they would be extremely cautious before allowing him to use it, and certainly not for a prolonged time.

The fact that he was SO ill, without an underlying condition, really scares me! And also that a very highly intelligent boy would spend 8 hours on a playstation (he was 13 at the time btw).

tortoiseSHELL · 19/12/2007 12:05

article here about less extreme case - fit triggered after 11 mins play

Hulababy · 19/12/2007 12:07

I think the fact that he was allowed to spend 8 hours on a Playstation is of far more concern than the actual games console itself.

Whether or not it was the games console that triggered something in this child is difficult to say. With such prolong uninterrupted use who knows? But I would have thought that was an extreme reaction anyway?

But it could also be other stuff that triggered the fit. My friend (adult) just had a big fit at the wheel of his car - not epileptic, never had a fit before. Again no reason yet found although still having tests a couple of months or so later.

So the Playstation may not be the thing at fault either, no one knows I guess. But yes, if that was my son I would be getting rid of the games console. I'd also be asking myself how I'd allowed him to be on the thing for so long in ove go.

TheIceQueen · 19/12/2007 12:09

WTF were they doing letting a 11yr old play a violent game that was clearly for 15+????

tortoiseSHELL · 19/12/2007 12:47

That's true hulababy, but on the other hand, if you google epileptic games console there are reports of fits after only a few minutes, which I think is concerning.

If you think how careful we are over other things we give our kids - why should this be any different?

TheIceQueen · 19/12/2007 12:51

tortoise - a lot of the ones I've just found are from people whose were epileptic, and the games triggered a fit.....so in lot of those cases the fit didn't come from "nowhere".

tortoiseSHELL · 19/12/2007 12:54

True, but couldn't you say the same about vaccinations - that they affected people who were susceptible anyway?

It just worries me that something that is SO popular with children and by its nature addictive can also have physical negative side effects. And potentially fatal, if someone were to hit their head in the midst of a fit.

My pathological hatred of them definitely did start when this boy we knew was rushed to hospital, but I didn't 'like' them before!

TheIceQueen · 19/12/2007 12:57

but there's a VERY clear warning inside everyone of our PS2 games about the risk to those that suffer from epilepsy. Surely if a child is epileptic you avoid situations which could trigger a fit? I should imagine most parents with a child that suffers from epilepsy wouldn't take them somewhere that there could be a lot of flash photography, so why give them the game when it's a known risk factor of epileptics??

tortoiseSHELL · 19/12/2007 13:02

the boy I know wasn't epileptic.

TheIceQueen · 19/12/2007 13:06

I know - but the vast majority of cases I've just been reading on google are about children who were already known to be epileptic.

I'm pretty sure that if there were large numbers of children who had no history of epilepsy or fits suffering from them as a result of game stations we'd hear a LOT more about it in the news and there would be a lot more links high up in the google search on it.

tortoiseSHELL · 19/12/2007 13:17

True. But I'm just pointing out that they are not necessarily harmless. In the same way that vaccinations are fine for most children, but for some can be catastrophic. It's not a definitive proof that 'games consoles are bad', but for me it reinforces my decision not to have them.

katierocket · 19/12/2007 13:27

"Because these types of toys are so passive and much like surfing on Mumsnet, provide surface stimulation, which when done too much can become addictive and at the expense of a person being able to get stimulation in other ways that require effort."

Ha ha ha, what utter baloney. "surface stimulation"?! So what is acceptable then? Suduko? learning japanese while simultaneously reading war and peace.

It's horses for courses. We all need to switch off from time to time. Of course if playing computer games is all children do it'll rot their brains but sometimes it's fun, like sometimes it's fun to run around outside and play games with friends, or dress up and role play or pretend to be in a rock band or read or draw or whatever. Computer games are part of today's society, like it or not. IT's not a replacement for other forms of fun - it's just another part of what children like to do.