Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wonder what stupid questions you've been asked

480 replies

backtolifebacktoreality · 09/12/2021 09:58

Last weekend I phoned a local florists
and asked them to send some flowers to a nearby friend.

The friend lives in a relatively small cul de sac. The florist obviously asked the address for them to be delivered to. I advised they lived at No 12.

She then went on asking all sorts of questions about how she could find the house once in the street, ie what side of the road etc. She then asked questions about what would make the house recognisable to her, ie what colour front door.

I had to bite my lip but really wanted to respond "the fact that is has the number 12 on the door"!

OP posts:
FatOaf · 09/12/2021 11:38

My maiden name was a colour. A common, everyday colour. One syllable. Can only be spelled one way. Yet endless people asked me how to spell it! For years!

Unless it's Black (or possibly Blue), I'm not sure about this:

Green/Greene/Gryn
White/Whyte
Brown/Browne/Braun

TheCloudBotherer · 09/12/2021 11:40

I recently mentioned to a friend that I was getting my hair cut later that day.
"Shorter?"

Well, yeah...

FatOaf · 09/12/2021 11:41

“What’s the author’s name?” from a bookshop employee when I asked to order The Diary Of Anne Frank.

You've obviously never read The Autobiography of Alice B Toklas by Gertrude Stein.

Original poster
backtolifebacktoreality · 09/12/2021 11:44

@megustalacerveza

It sounds like the woman could well have had some kind of disability, such as a visual difficulty, OP. Lots of people have trouble being able to see house numbers, and the fact she asked for the colour of the door suggests this. She also doesn't actually know that your friend lives in a small cul-de-sac and that it would be fairly obvious which house it was. She delivers to dozens of houses every day and has probably wasted a lot of time trying to find houses, and having some hints about how to find somewhere more easily cuts down on the wasted time and delays.

Likewise, the person who asked if the form was complete - you must never have worked in an admin role if you don't know that it is in fact common for people to submit incomplete forms missing crucial information. There's a reason people ask questions like that.

I can't believe how many people jump to the conclusion that someone must be stupid for asking things like this, rather than the far more likely scenario that there's a good reason they're asking.

Has anyone ever suggested that you might have a problem with empathy and understanding where other people are coming from?

The florist has no disability as I know her.

With regard to the form, I've worked in a very senior admin role. I don't have a lack of empathy. I just prefer not to be spoken to like I'm stupid. If we haven't completed the form then that's obviously our issue!

OP posts:
GrandTheftWalrus · 09/12/2021 11:45

I called my mum on her house phone and asked where she was.

Cattitudes · 09/12/2021 11:46

'So do they speak English in England?' / Which state is England in?

To be fair the state of England was more of a point of debate back then whereas now I could confidently answer dire.

Ubiquery · 09/12/2021 11:49

You've obviously never read The Autobiography of Alice B Toklas by Gertrude Stein.

No, I haven’t heard of it. But The Diary of Anne Frank isn’t exactly Adrian Mole territory, is it?

daimbarsatemydogsbone · 09/12/2021 11:50

@RuleOfCat

When my mum died I returned to the UK and as her executor had a pile of paperwork to sort out, on top of arranging the funeral. A bank needed a particular document to be notarized, and that required my mum's death cert to be presented. So the lawyer/notary is in the middle of doing this, with a certificate in front of him showing that my mum had died a few days ago, and he decides this is the right time for a bit of small talk: 'So, is there any particular reason you're in the UK this time, is it a holiday?' No you fucking idiot, I'm burying my mother tomorrow.
My Dad died unexpectedly - he was due in court for a very minor traffic issue - not setting his handbrake on a public road. DP phoned the court who said we had to send them a copy of his death cert - to which I replied "or what?"
iklboodolphrednosedpaindear · 09/12/2021 11:51

It sounds like the woman could well have had some kind of disability, such as a visual difficulty,

Well she shouldn't be driving to deliver the flowers if she has!

theelephantinthegroup · 09/12/2021 11:54

@MsAgnesDiPesto

My maiden name was a colour. A common, everyday colour. One syllable. Can only be spelled one way. Yet endless people asked me how to spell it! For years!
I think we may have had the same maiden-name, and a similar experience.

My married name is less common, and there are several variations/spellings of it in general use. But no one has ever asked me how to spell it (which would actually be useful as most people assume the wrong version)

Fizzbangwallop · 09/12/2021 11:55

When a friend asked my DM where her colonoscopy was being done. Her answer was ‘up my bum!’ Smile

LadyCatStark · 09/12/2021 11:55

DS: do I have bags under my eyes.
Me: erm yes a little I suppose.
DS: where?
Me: … under your eyes…
DS: what a stupid answer!
Me: we’ll if you ask a stupid question, you’ll get a stupid answer.

Chrysanthemum5 · 09/12/2021 11:56

I have a younger sister and we look very similar and people often ask if we are twins. Which is fine until someone asked, I replied 'No' and they then asked me (in all seriousness) if I was sure.

TheWayTheLightFalls · 09/12/2021 11:56

Another one with twins here and I get allllll the dumb questions. Though bonus points to the fuckers who swiftly move on to ask how they were conceived. Literally, strangers in Tesco go there.

Thecurtainsofdestiny · 09/12/2021 12:00

Not all houses have numbers on...

elliejjtiny · 09/12/2021 12:00

I was with my ds who has eds and autism and was failure to thrive at the time. He was sat in his buggy, shaking his head from side to side randomly as he often still does and wearing 6-9 month clothes so he was quite tiny for his age. A lady came up to me and asked if he was mine, I said yes. Asked me how old he was, I said 16 months. She then asked me if I was sure as he looked more like 6 months to her.

My 11 year old is short and my 8 year old is tall so lots of people ask if they are twins. My 8 year old is a lot taller than my 7 year old so despite being only 12 months apart and being known collectively as "the babies" when they were little, nobody has ever thought they were twins.

Restart10 · 09/12/2021 12:00

It sounds like the woman could well have had some kind of disability, such as a visual difficulty1

This could be used as an excuse/reason for absolutely everything then.

Itreallyistimetochangethings · 09/12/2021 12:03

When dc was a baby and in the pram - one day a woman looked at him and complemented his eyebrows which were noticeable and just perfect I must admit. She then looked at me in all seriousness and asked if plucked them 😳

theelephantinthegroup · 09/12/2021 12:03

When my elderly relative died, I called TV licencing to cancel her free licence. I explained the situation and that I was executor of her estate. AFTER this explanation they asked 'So can I speak to the licence holder, Mrs [relative's name]'. When I reiterated why that was not possible I was forwarded to a manager who again said she'd need to speak to my relative.

StrawberrySanta · 09/12/2021 12:04

I work in a shop. "Excuse me do you sell bread?" Or "is this where you pay for fuel?" Erm this is the till so what do you think

FoxgloveSummers · 09/12/2021 12:07

@theelephantinthegroup my poor dad had to do those calls, I think at one point he said of course the manager could speak to her, he'd just get an exhumation order.

TheLovleyChebbyMcGee · 09/12/2021 12:07

'Not had the baby yet?'

'Yeah mate, just thought I'd rather come into work to spend the day working with you over being at home with my newborn' Also, my bump is still massive

'Yeah mate, I just left it at home'

I had this question a few times when overdue with my son. Bracing for it all over again as I'm 36+5 with his sibling, but thankfully WFH so will avoid the worst of it fingers crossed!

Constellationstation · 09/12/2021 12:09

@FatOaf

My maiden name was a colour. A common, everyday colour. One syllable. Can only be spelled one way. Yet endless people asked me how to spell it! For years!

Unless it's Black (or possibly Blue), I'm not sure about this:

Green/Greene/Gryn
White/Whyte
Brown/Browne/Braun

This reminds me of when someone said their surname was ‘Pool’ and I asked him how to spell it. He laughed at me and said ‘just the normal way’. So I wrote down ‘Poole’ because I knew someone of that surname. It turns out he was saying ‘Paul’ (in a London accent).
ItsDisneyBitch · 09/12/2021 12:10

It was hugely passive aggressive but I was asked by one yummy mummy type why my children had different surnames.

I just replied well I would think it was obvious they have different fathers.

She knew full well she just wanted me to say it.

Mumoblue · 09/12/2021 12:13

I can’t count how many times people have asked me if I’m left-handed while I’m actively writing with my left hand.

Also I worked in a DIY store a few years ago and a guy asked me if we sold milk. Uh, no.