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Original poster

Collection for the boss... inappropriate?

294 replies

Littlejuice · 09/12/2021 06:30

Always, always buy my whole team Xmas gifts. Just a bottle of wine or something but to say thanks.

As a senior manager however, and in my view well paid despite long hours, I do not expect or wish to receive one (public sector)

We've had a new director for TWO MONTHS who has recruited one of his previous employees into team, this month. Email from new starter yesterday sharing his Bacs details to all the staff (many of whom on a quarter of the director salary) saying it's nice if we do a bit of Xmas appreciation and collect for the boss...

I have contributed and said to my team I'll put their shares in as team contribution as I am so conscious many of them struggling - but isn't this just really not recognising the situation of some people? Dear people on 20k please donate to buy someone on 120k a gift?

OP posts:
whitehorsesdonotlie · 09/12/2021 10:32

I'd email the cheeky new starter and say 'it's not your place to organise this'. Tell him to follow the lead of more established staff.

I'd also say it's really cheeky, considering the year we've had and how much the boss earns.

CurzonDax · 09/12/2021 10:32

I'm sure toady will take all the praise and thanks from the director too, for being the 'organiser'. Toady also seems like he's so far up the director's backside, it's no surprise he was brought over to work under manager.

I could understand a polite email, "This is what I'm thinking. Would anyone like to contribute?" (and then leaving it up to people whether they do or not), but sending the bank details is just presumptuous, and ensures that those who can't contribute feel awkward.

Good thing that toady is such good pals with the director, because I'd imagine he's made himself unpopular with many others over this.

StellaGibson118 · 09/12/2021 10:34

I wouldn't be contributing if it were me, but I'd feel guilty and anxious if I didn't in case I was questioned.

thedefinitionofmadness · 09/12/2021 10:37

Sorry I think you need to assert yourself and say this isn't all appropriate. In fact, speak to the manager and get them to kill it.

thedefinitionofmadness · 09/12/2021 10:38

It's a bit like when Nicholas Serota left the TATE, all the front of house staff on minimum wage were asked to contribute to buying him a BOAT. A BOAT. It's really not a good look.

billy1966 · 09/12/2021 10:44

@Welcometothejingles

Quiet word with HR for the new recruit, you need to nip this in the bud now. Often when bosses bring in staff from old jobs, is that they transfer their previous working habits to the new environment. This new recruit needs to be coached in the values of your organisation now before they start spreading more inappropriate habits.
This.

The request is both crass, tone deaf and offensive.

I really think it is a HR matter.

newnamefor2021 · 09/12/2021 10:46

Contact HR. Highly inappropriate behaviour.

Thegreencup · 09/12/2021 10:49

Let me guess. Its public sector. Is the boss male and the newly appointed lacky female? Does the lacky OTT titter at all of the bosses ridiculous dad jokes?

I've been in the public sector for 20 years and seen this same old bullshit too many times.

CharityDingle · 09/12/2021 10:53

Completely inappropriate. Needs to be nipped in the bud.

This is ripe to be picked up by the tabloids, unfortunately.

elbea · 09/12/2021 11:02

My work once did a collection for the business owner’s son’s 21st birthday. I was an apprentice on £4 an hour but I made my £10 donation to buy the son of a billionaire wine for his collection Grin

WorraLiberty · 09/12/2021 11:17

I have contributed and said to my team I'll put their shares in as team contribution as I am so conscious many of them struggling - but isn't this just really not recognising the situation of some people? Dear people on 20k please donate to buy someone on 120k a gift?

This was just silly.

The best thing you could've done for your team was to ignore the email and advise them to ignore it too.

You're encouraging the very behaviour you're complaining about.

CaptSkippy · 09/12/2021 11:23

Good grief, OP. Where do you work? Their attitudes are all wrong.

There are several glaring issues here:

  1. That you as a senior manager can't have more of an input on this
  2. That anyone from management could even consider suggesting this as appropriate
  3. That there are people on your staff (who presumably work fulltime) are financially struggling on their salaries.

The place you work sounds horribly greedy and toxic and exploitative.

RobinPenguins · 09/12/2021 11:33

@Thegreencup

Let me guess. Its public sector. Is the boss male and the newly appointed lacky female? Does the lacky OTT titter at all of the bosses ridiculous dad jokes?

I've been in the public sector for 20 years and seen this same old bullshit too many times.

Really? I’ve been working in public sector 15 years across different organisations and have never seen a request like this.
3luckystars · 09/12/2021 11:35

It sounds like a scam. You really need to say something and get the money back.

AliceWo · 09/12/2021 13:17

In 40 years of working, this situation has only happened to me once. I was a Saturday girl in a supermarket and didn't have the nerve to say no when I was told to chip in about half my day's wages for the boss's Christmas present.

I do buy my current boss small gifts for his children for Christmas, but that's because we are friends.

BertramLacey · 09/12/2021 13:18

It's inappropriate and tone-deaf, yes, but it's not fraud or bribery and it doesn't actually contravene any policies for this person to start a collection for a senior colleague.

Fraud can be defined as 'wrongful or criminal deception intended to result in financial or personal gains.' Toady is leaving himself open to accusations of this. He asked for BACS payment, meaning the money is (presumably) going straight into his account. It's not a collection envelope doing the rounds. He will know what went in there but without access to his account no-one else will. So unless he prints off his bank statement and shows everyone who contributed the totals and presents them with a receipt, how will anyone know what was collected and how it was spent?

And as PP have said, what happens at the next round of annual reviews? What happens when the next promotion comes up? Will Toady tell the new director who gave what? Of course, Toady might be misguided and doing this in good faith, but they cannot prove this and yes, they are open to accusations of wrongdoing.

BertramLacey · 09/12/2021 13:20

Let me guess. Its public sector. Is the boss male and the newly appointed lacky female? Does the lacky OTT titter at all of the bosses ridiculous dad jokes?

The OP refers to 'his BACS details' so I would guess that Toady is male.

gabsdot45 · 09/12/2021 13:43

When I was first married I had a terrible job with a horrible boss. We were all expected to contribute £10 to his Christmas present. This was years ago so £10 was about £50 in today's money . My food budget at the time was £20 per week.
I refused. I said I didn't have that much money to waste on a man I didn't like. I wouldn't have been able to Offord to spend £10 on a present for my own mother.
A few of the other office girls agreed but in the end they all paid up. I was approached my several people to tell me I had to contribute but I stood firm.
I'm so glad I didn't contribute. He was a horrible man. I left the company a couple of months later TG.
You should like a nice boss to pay your staffs contribution but I'd suggest you speak to the person organising the collection and tell them how inappropriate this is.

Warblerinwinter · 09/12/2021 14:19

@TractorAndHeadphones

Also *@Warblerinwinter* IMO giving gifts isn’t just about reward. As a boss keeping your employees happy makes your job easier. Giving them a little something out of your own money can get goodwill. Of course overworking them for example and then trying to make it up with a box of chocolates won’t cut it but orgs aren’t perfect. We currently have a travel ban for example so boss is buying train tickets for a team member in a different location to travel to our Christmas do. He’s not going to achieve anything by not doing so
Absolutely agree…my point is that me as boss paying out of my pocket for a whole team means a crap gift for them that they probably don’t want and doesn’t really make them happy apart form maybe in that instance. To keep employees happy requires year round effort and management skill and ultimately an employee feeling happy that their work and contribution is properly recognised. I just don’t think that c9mes with a crap gift from me. It needs to come form the organisation as well. They may have only been in my team for a few months or couple of years- they need to be happy that the whole organisation respects themselves and recognises them. Giving them gifts at Christmas myself (other than secret Santa and nibbles etc ) just seems to me like your a boss who wants to be liked and win popularity stakes- as I say seems like virtue signalling to me.
Sexnotgender · 09/12/2021 14:29

What a joke! You sound lovely though 😊

WanderleyWagon · 09/12/2021 14:31

What @toomuchfaster said

Newmumatlast · 09/12/2021 14:32

@Littlejuice

Always, always buy my whole team Xmas gifts. Just a bottle of wine or something but to say thanks.

As a senior manager however, and in my view well paid despite long hours, I do not expect or wish to receive one (public sector)

We've had a new director for TWO MONTHS who has recruited one of his previous employees into team, this month. Email from new starter yesterday sharing his Bacs details to all the staff (many of whom on a quarter of the director salary) saying it's nice if we do a bit of Xmas appreciation and collect for the boss...

I have contributed and said to my team I'll put their shares in as team contribution as I am so conscious many of them struggling - but isn't this just really not recognising the situation of some people? Dear people on 20k please donate to buy someone on 120k a gift?

Agreed. It shouldn't happen
FrankGrillosWrist · 09/12/2021 14:40

You're just encouraging this thing by offering to pay for everyone else. How did you get that job 🤔

SSOYS · 09/12/2021 14:55

I'm appalled by this- have you reported it?

SolasAnla · 09/12/2021 15:02

@Littlejuice.

Get the IT department to pull the email.
=>Basic GDPR control

There is no situation where the company allows personal bank details to be shared and stored on the company's system in multiple places on multiple machines.

There is no situation where the company allows an employee to asked for money to be lodging into that employees bank account. It sets a poor tone, people can offer but the employee should not be able to track "gift" payments.
Re GDPR She/he is effectively harvesting their bank details.

The new starter should be asking if it's appropate and within the existing culture to send that request. Evidently it's not. The new director should be told as well if she/he signed off on it.

IMO what the employee did is tone deaf and self serving. Some traditions need to be left behind in their old job.