Aibu ?

[Butterflies2098]

I had to go out twice yesterday , once in the afternoon to buy my daughter some winter tights . Secondly after dinner as we didn’t have enough food especially for the children’s lunch boxes . My partner shouted at me and said what your going out again ! Your spending too much time away from the family , which is not true . I feel awful anytime I leave the house

What the fuck? This isn't right OP.

He is, not you.

You must know that's not normal?

Do either of you go to work?

YABU not to put any clues in the title

Tell him he can do the shopping and prepare the lunches if he's that bothered.

Is the issue that he had to look after the children?

He sounds abusive

It was horrible ,he made me cry then he said ah what’s wrong I mean we both work from home . I feel like I’m going mad . I’m trying to be the best mum I can be .

Why didn't you do the food at the same time as the tights?

It was pouring with rain , and I got soaked

If he first deliberately makes you cry over something which is not a fault and then ostentatiously comforts you, that is the reddest of red flags.

And if you think you are going mad, don't. You aren't. You are having to deal with aberrant behaviour in somebody else.

He sounds horrible

It’s difficult to make him happy . I’m trying my hardest , I’m currently working two jobs etc and doing all the house work . I don’t have anyone to talk to

Send him next time

@Butterflies2098 what does he do to try and make you happy?

I’m trying to think of the last time I was . I can’t recall. I get called names about my hair , clothes and apparently my breath smells . My confidence is at an all time low .

Oh he's bloody awful isn't he?

I doubt very much that this is anything to do with you or your behaviour, in reality. Your hair, your clothes and your breath are likely to be objectively fine. He has just decided for some reason of his own to use you as a verbal punch-bag.

Jesus, OP. Are there any positives to this relationship, or is he just an abusive, controlling arsehole all the time?

I had a face to face appointment with the Dr a months ago I just broke down . I don’t know why he does this to make me feel so bad .

I'm really sorry, I didn't mean to be abrupt. OP, this is not right, it's not healthy, and you can access help from Woman's Aid.

www.womensaid.org.uk/

He does it to control you, I'm afraid.

Gosh it wasn't like you were out having an enjoyable time is it ? You were doing the right thing by your family making sure they had food and warm clothing , he sounds awful , it's not your job to make him happy , if he's not happy that's his problem that he needs to deal with but it's not your fault
He's using you as a verbal punch bag and belittling you to make himself feel..... better ? Sounds like he's very much the problem not you .
Do you have any good family members or friends close by who you can talk to irl ?
Not sure what to suggest , hopefully someone will come on with ideas to boost your own self esteem

This is really upsetting to read. You sound so, so down, OP

You do realise your life doesn't have to be like this, right?

Thanks . I can’t talk to mum anymore about it . I don’t really have anyone