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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I have the morning after pill in my hand but don’t know what to do!

39 replies

Chocoholic26 · 07/12/2021 09:08

Posting for traffic! Feeling so sick with anxiousness. DH and I had unprotected sex on Saturday night. Was probably ovulating or about to ovulate. We have 3dc with the youngest being 4months old. We thought we were happy to try for dc4 but now I’m freaking out that we are making a stupid decision. I ordered the morning after pill (EllaOne) and I’ve got it in my hand right now and I’ve no idea if I should take it or not. I’m in turmoil! Anyone ever taking it and still conceived? Was everything okay with your pregnancy and baby? Now worried that maybe I’ve already conceived and harm baby. Worried it won’t work. Worried that if I don’t take it and am in fact pregnant that we won’t be able to cope! Please someone help ease my mind. I know nobody can make the decision for me but just some sort of past experience in this situation would really help. Also, I know we have been totally irresponsible not being careful - I’m already giving myself enough of a hard time over that without anybody else chipping in. Thank you x

OP posts:
CountRostoff · 07/12/2021 09:12

Do you know where you are in your cycle? If you’re back having regular periods that is? The morning after pill only works to prevent ovulation so if taken in latter half of your cycle won’t work…

CountRostoff · 07/12/2021 09:14

So sorry just see you’re at ovulation time now. It won’t harm your baby if you’ve already conceived

ErickBroch · 07/12/2021 09:18

It won't cause harm... many people have MAP failures and I have never read any correlation or causation between the MAP and birth defects or disabilities.

WeAllHaveWings · 07/12/2021 09:22

The MAP will not harm a pregnancy if you have already conceived.

If I didn't want to be pregnant I would take the MAP asap and hope I hadn't ovulated yet.

Jibberjabberhutt · 07/12/2021 09:38

It’s a moot point if you’ve already ovulated, it won’t work. All it does is stop ovulation.

Jibberjabberhutt · 07/12/2021 09:39

Sorry I really did not read the post properly. 🤦🏼‍♀️

WheelieBinPrincess · 07/12/2021 09:45

It’s really unclear from your post what you want tbh. I think it’s nuts to actively try for a fourth DC at four months pp but I’m not you.

LionPhish · 07/12/2021 09:58

I think you need to talk to someone IRL and not talk to mumsnet - this is an epic decision and it should not be up to people on the internet to sway your views.

backTofrontagain · 07/12/2021 10:02

@WheelieBinPrincess

It’s really unclear from your post what you want tbh. I think it’s nuts to actively try for a fourth DC at four months pp but I’m not you.
We don’t know OPs age though some people don’t have time on their side so so have to ttc quite soon after having a baby
WheelieBinPrincess · 07/12/2021 10:05

@backTofrontagain true, I’m 36 myself but too tired from baby DS to bother trying for anymore 😂

although OP already has 3….

Anyway, no random on the internet is going to be able to help you make a decision, and it’s a bit of an odd thing to go asking.

heldinadream · 07/12/2021 10:25

OP maybe it was just hormones making you want number 4 and now you can see that you don't, really? Is that possible? What does your DP say about this? I do feel for you, it's so hard, but if you are going to take the MAP you need to crack on. Flowers

oakleaffy · 07/12/2021 10:32

@WheelieBinPrincess

It’s really unclear from your post what you want tbh. I think it’s nuts to actively try for a fourth DC at four months pp but I’m not you.
They weren't TTC! But had unprotected sex, hence need for MAP.

@Chocoholic26, it's only a decision you can make. I know what I'd do in your circumstances, but I'm not you.

Best wishes, whatever you decide.

Years ago I took the MAP, never regretted it for an instant, as one never knew if one even needed it or not.

oakleaffy · 07/12/2021 10:35

@WheelieBinPrincess
Sorry, I misread the post... they WERE TTC

Apologies for that.

AwkwardPaws27 · 07/12/2021 10:35

Take the MAP.
If you've already conceived, no harm done.
If you haven't, you're only preventing it this cycle. There's nothing to stop you TTC next month, or in a few months when you've given your body more time to recover from your recent pregnancy.

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 07/12/2021 10:38

Deep down you must want another baby otherwise there's no way in hell you'd have taken any risk in the first place.

Also you'd have taken the pill straight way without any hesitation.

LittleGwyneth · 07/12/2021 10:43

It won't work unless it's taken before you ovulate, so if you've already ovulated then there's not a lot of point in taking it, but it won't harm the pregnancy.

Rno3gfr · 07/12/2021 10:43

The morning after only works by delaying ovulation, it’s not an abortion pill.

Honestly, you don’t sound ready yet. Wait a month of two and see how you feel. If you’re getting this level of anxiety then just focus on the new baby for a bit. You can have a 4th DC, it doesn’t mean it has to happen at this very moment.

Original poster
Chocoholic26 · 07/12/2021 10:50

Thanks, I think that’s been my main concern. Taking it and potentially harming the baby. The internet seems do have some dodgy articles about EllaOne. I’m fully aware mumsnet cannot make this decision for me, as I did state in my OP. Deep down, you’re probably right, I would love a large family but I think the reality of it has just kind of hit me and how much our life would change x

OP posts:
Original poster
Chocoholic26 · 07/12/2021 10:52

I’m not 100% sure if I’ve already ovulated as my cycles are back to normal yet. I’ve also read that EllaOne can prevent implantation? Unsure if that is accurate though.

OP posts:
HailAdrian · 07/12/2021 10:52

MAP didn't work for me, I didn't want to be pregnant and thankfully, I had other options.

Original poster
Chocoholic26 · 07/12/2021 10:54

Cycles are not back to normal that should say

OP posts:
Squicknick · 07/12/2021 10:55

Four kids is amazing! (I have five.) Family life is busy but they are great, I wouldn't have it any other way, and having two close in age is brilliant! Best of luck to you.

Mummyratbag · 07/12/2021 11:00

As others have said if you have ovulated it's too late.

If you don't want to be pregnant get an emergency GP appointment for the coil to be fitted (what is advised if it's too late for MAP).

Original poster
Chocoholic26 · 07/12/2021 11:09

Thanks @Squicknick think I know that we will be absolutely fine if I am pregnant and the pill doesn’t work. Ours are close together too and I love it xx

OP posts:
awmum2b · 07/12/2021 11:15

I took double dose of MAP (was on a herbal remedy that impacted birth control)...it didn't work as I had ovulated at the same time (seriously that little foetus was determined!) and my now 3.5 year old is absolutely fine and still as headstrong and determined.

It'll pretty much be a waiting game but wishing you the best of luck whatever the outcomes. xx