To ask the worst behaviour at Christmas you’ve witnessed by an adult?

[SoniaFouler]

Mine is:

Drunk cousin (24 at the time) shouting and arguing with everyone for most of Boxing Day three years ago, then topped it off when someone told her to stop being stupid by standing up and scraping the entire contents of her dinner plate all over the table and made my aunt cry.

One Christmas, me, exH and our 2 under 2 travelled to see his family in a different country. He asked to make a speech at the Christmas Eve dinner and informed everyone that he is the happiest man ever to walk the earth as he has met a love of his life... and he will be moving in with her soon. I honestly thought I was hallucinating as just the night before we submitted paperwork for remortgaging and booked a holiday for the summer... we had some difficulties but I had no idea that we're "done".

Ex-MIL: "Ooooh, so did it finally work out with Charlotte (fake name obv)? Congratulations!"

I was expected to stay in their house for another week, sharing the room and the bed with the ex. I left early with the children on the next flight on the Christmas day and from that time I am known as the crazy ex who ruined Christmas.

The year of the bikes

My narc mother ‘allowed’ us to open our presents and then stood up telling my brothers to follow her

They did,and in the kitchen where 3 top of the range pushbikes

Cue a ton of ‘thanks mum!’ And ‘awesome’

I’m not a greedy person by nature but I knew she would have got me something extra as she’s very ‘keeping up appearances’

I’m sat there for about 15 minutes and nothing so I wandered off,holding what I got,up to my room

Seconds later,she’s there,clutching a cheap vanity case

It was thrown at me and that’s when the beating started

I was ungrateful for not being happy and pleased for getting a £10 vanity case (that I didn’t even want) over my brothers bikes that cost over a grand each

It’s not the cost that bothered me,it was the fact I was meant to be squealing over it and massaging her ego over a crappy present

Oh and then she dumped it on me that I was babysitting her mates kids so they could go get pissed up after lunch (she had arranged it and not told me)

I got £5 for babysitting and missing out on my own Xmas lunch which she took off me as ‘payment’ for not being grateful enough

@Laila747 I may steal that expression “rancid ditch pig”.

I have actually had Christmas mostly on my own in recent years, I often check into a five star hotel for a couple of days. Highly recommend! My extended family are usually away, I’m single & I’m not that fussed over it. So it’s perfect really.

My MIL is a fucking bag.

The one and only Christmas I did with her she insisted that we had to come to hers for Cheistmas. Christmas not being Christmas without family. Except her house is colder than cold as she is very much one of these 'hour in the morning and hour in the evening' heating types. Seriously, you could see your breath when in bed and ice on the INSIDE of the window is completely normal. So when Christmas day finally came, not only was I half frozen, but she also insisted that the women in the house MUST stay in the kitchen to prepare Xmas dinner for the men. Actually, I would rather be in the lounge speaking to long lost Uncle Barry but......

She then had a screaming fit at me because I didn't cut the potatoes in the correct manner so every piece looked the same shape. And rolled the stuffing into balls instead of squares. And when she finally came to serving the dinner, it was very much men first, and the women scrapping for the few roast potatoes left behind. Alcohol (for the men only, obviously) was rationed out, and yes she DID use a measuring jug to pour pub measures.
There is a lot more to it than this but I would out myself if I carried on.

We are now NC, and even if we were not we live 650 miles away. There is no way on earth I would be driving that way to have the worlds most miserable Christmas.

As for Christmas dinner in this house, we don't have one. Dinner is what you want. Literally. If the kids want it, I'm cooking and serving it. One of the DC had a fish finger and ketchup sandwich last year and the other one had 6 yorkshire puddings. The kids are happy and love it, Dh and I are happy because the kids are happy and relaxed. Oh, and the only frozen thing at Christmas is the ice in my coca cola.

@honourablemrsgrinch

One Christmas, me, exH and our 2 under 2 travelled to see his family in a different country. He asked to make a speech at the Christmas Eve dinner and informed everyone that he is the happiest man ever to walk the earth as he has met a love of his life... and he will be moving in with her soon. I honestly thought I was hallucinating as just the night before we submitted paperwork for remortgaging and booked a holiday for the summer... we had some difficulties but I had no idea that we're "done".

Ex-MIL: "Ooooh, so did it finally work out with Charlotte (fake name obv)? Congratulations!"

I was expected to stay in their house for another week, sharing the room and the bed with the ex. I left early with the children on the next flight on the Christmas day and from that time I am known as the crazy ex who ruined Christmas.

I would take pleasure in that title as it shows you stood up for yourself and did the only thing possible - got out of there. What a nasty pile of crap, he and his family are.

Step mum would choose with of her three step daughters she liked best that year and although we would get the same exact gifts - which were crap anyway, things like cotton balls and underwear - the favourite child would get theirs from Next and John Lewis and the other two would be from Primark.

Looking back - the effort it would take to shop twice to be so petty exhausts me!

If anybody is reading this and planning on getting absolutely wasted this Christmas, do have a serious think first about whether you can handle it.

I imagine the people messing up Christmas day by excessive boozing are not shy of a drink and inappropriate behaviour for the rest of the year, it is just that there is a higher expectation placed on Christmas to be like a John Lewis advert of perfection.

So my DH died suddenly on 21st December, which bollocksed Christmas.
Then my mate phoned me and said look, I'm on my own, you're on your own, fuck it, I'll come over to yours and we'll have the day together. (She drove and I didn't.)

She was going to set off early and we'd have lunch together, except that some arse parked over her drive and then basically just fucked off leaving the car while they went who knows where. Couldn't get out of the house. Four hours later she set off, Christmas dinner ruined. We weren't that bothered, we just had cheese on toast and a bottle of wine and we were all good.

The appalling behaviour was from a friend of DH's - a seriously unattractive, obese, greasy, revolting old bastard who used to shit himself on nights out - who rocked up when we were sitting down for lunch with a bottle of knock-off perfume for me from the local market. Who the fuck even hits on a woman whose husband has been dead for three days??

• but it was OK, it wasn't like he was cheap, he'd brought one for A as well in the hope of a threesome.

HOIK.

@Jacaranda75 I'm so sad for you and brave of you to post. I hope your Christmas's and indeed all your days are better now.

FIL standing outside my bedroom door and telling DH to get me to be nicer to him. I already felt bloody uncomfortable in their unwelcoming home, that obviously did not make it better as he'd hoped! Of course I did not do what he wanted, stayed in my room until DH told his dad he needed to come and apologise/explain. FIL then came in and didn't say anything relevant, just went on about how his brothers don't speak to him (wonder why). We left early to go to my own parents.

@Shannith thank you, that’s really kind. Luckily, Christmases are very different for my DC. We don’t go crazy with presents, etc but there is no drunkenness or aggression in our house and our DC know they are loved and cherished.

My sister. I was 17, she was 27. We had a family tradition that Santa would hide a present somewhere in the house to be found after everything else had happened (presents stacked up, wrapping paper put in bin, all the washing-up done).

We were in mum's room and she turned on me for daring to apply to Cambridge. How could I do that to mum, it would be too expensive (???). Of course she was just jealous she hadn't applied, let alone gone there. She reduced me to tears.

I told mum, who 'had words' but I never got an apology. I feel now that if she'd been made to apologise to me then she might have felt less entitled to treat me like shit for the last 20 years. But asking her to say sorry might have upset the poor dear.

My (now ex) husband went out with his mates on Christmas Eve, came home and then drank half a bottle of whisky. He came upstairs, found my 8 year old lad in our bed with me (he was too excited to sleep) and started screaming and ranting at us.

He eventually went to sleep in my son's bed, but I made a promise to myself that this would be the end of our marriage (not an isolated event, unfortunately, but the first that had impacted on any of my DC).

The next morning, we tried to wake him up for the kids to open their presents, but he had been so drunk there was no waking him. When he did surface, he was so angry that the kids had opened their gifts without him there that he picked up a pan full of brussel sprouts and threw it at me, closely followed by a kettle full of hot water.

We were divorced by May that year.

It’s not awful, it’s funny. We call it the night of the dancing Turkeys. My dad doesn’t drink very much and many years ago (early 80’s), he was allowed to go the pub on Xmas eve. This particular year he had promised my mum a turkey from a bloke in the pub. Insane today but in the 80’s everyone expected a dose of food poisoning and we live in a little country village and the farmers would often flog off cheap meat in the pub. Mum told him he’d better not eff it up as she had a houseful to cook for on Xmas day. The clock kept ticking and it was getting later and later, we were supposed to be going to an aunts for Xmas tea. No dad. Just as my mum was about to implode we heard a commotion at the end of the street, about four of the dads in the street came waltzing down the road holding the turkeys like ballroom dancers with their wives coming out to drag them home. I will never forget my dad giggling like a school girl trying to get Frank the turkey to talk at us. My mother nearly kicked him out…although that might have been for the box of black magic and some awful red nylon lingerie that he kept nudging at her. She told me about the knickers many years later.

Dsis boyfriend. Was a bit obsessed with bulking up. Turned up with a suitcase of protein shakes, proceeded to use up all the milk in the house making them and refused actual meals. Massively offended very elderly grandparent by refusing to remove his beanie hat at the dining table. She made a careful hint along the lines of "gosh x, I thin you might get rather warm wearing your woolly hat at dinner. I'm putting my bag in the hall, can I take it for you?". He then clearly was too warm as removed his jumper and sat there wearing only a white wifebeater but refused to take off the hat!!

Our little boy was 2. Parents in law visited for Christmas - we had horses and dogs and explained we’d be up and about early walking dogs and sorting horses and would be back before our son woke up (he was a reliable sleeper and never woke up before 7.30 anyway) so we could start Christmas Day by seeing him open his presents. Sadly parents in law were determined to wake him up deliberately and by the time we got home they had woken him up and got him to open all his presents so we didn’t get to watch him or see his face.

Rather excellently however, they were in such a blind rush to get our of their room and into his bedroom that they shut one of the cats in their room who took a (once in a lifetime!) indignant shit on their pillow. Then a dog threw up on the floor and my father in law skidded across the room in it, so I felt slightly less annoyed by this point. Not horrific behaviour but I never really forgave them for denying us the chance to see the first Christmas morning that he was genuinely excited for and they knew how much planning had gone into making it special.

It was always my brother. Tantrums, right into his 30's. He screamed and shouted in front of my then 3yo DD because I asked him to eat his trifle at the table with us instead of turning the telly on and eating on the new sofa - I was utterly broke and saved hard for that sofa, didn't allow DD to eat on it and besides, it was a big family meal. He threw the trifle at the sofa, then stormed out and left his poor DP at mine. They lived hours away so my dad had to take her home the next day. We went NC with him when he threatened similar shit at my wedding and was asked to attend evening only if he couldn't control his temper. He said as family I had to put up with whatever he did, including smashing up the reception. So we disinvited him entirely.

ExDPs mother sounds like a lot of the mil in here. Invited me Boxing Day the year we split up. Very pointedly gave out dozens of presents, nothing for me, and a t shirt and single tub of play do for 2yo DD. Other grandchildren including exes older kids surrounded by mountains of wrapped presents, DDs unwrapped in a carrier bag. Tbh, that was minor in the grand scheme of her nastiness and I thank Christ every day to be shot of the old bitch. DD loathes her too and even the golden grandchildren are just embarrassed by her. My now MIL is the nicest woman ever who treats all my kids as beloved grandchildren including DD and we adore her.

This pales into insignificance compared to most of the stories here but it was my F.
All at lovely in laws where my DMIL had kindly made me a veggie option, her lentil bake. I was the only veggie at the table and it was my own small baking dish, for everyone else there was turkey and beef. My F grabbed it took a huge serving spoonful and passed it to DFIL saying "we'll take what we want and she can have what's left". Needless to say DFIL passed it straight back to me because he's a normal person.
My F doesn't even like bloody lentils he just wanted to make sure I knew I was bottom of the pile and wrongly assumed everyone else thought just as little of me.

When my disabled sibling set the house on fire (by accident) on Boxing Day. Someone had left the lighter out for candles and they used it on those faux flower arrangements you can get. Obviously they went up in flames, which caught onto the curtains and so on. My dad had been having a nap so he didn’t notice until the alarm went off, and I was in another room with my mum trying to get one of my toys to work.

Queue much frantic shouting, flapping, my parents having to run the bath and all the sinks to try and put the fire out while I rang 999.

Luckily it was only severe smoke damage in one room and minor smoke damage in the other 3/4 rooms nearby and the fire brigade were able to put it out, but my god it was horrendous at the time.

I was about 12 at the time.

Needless to say it made us all ridiculously careful with lighters and such and even to this day I won’t leave a candle unattended, no matter how short the time is. And thank god for working fire alarms.

Oh and to clarify it obviously wasn’t siblings fault, I had misread the thread title and thought it was about the worst Christmas you had had from reading the other posts.

Obviously am not blaming sibling at all

@GertrudeKerfuffle

Not as dramatic as most of these, but BIL and his OH invited my MIL and her partner for Christmas got us off the hook for a change.

BIL rang MIL on Christmas Day and told her not to go round. No proper explanation, except that he and his OH had had some kind of falling out and wouldn't have visitors. He left his mum with no Christmas dinner, she and her OH didn't have much food in the house as they were working a lot over Christmas. We would have had them round had we known, but MIL kept schtum until later as this BIL is still her favourite for some reason and she doesn't like to mention his shit behaviour We were already NC but he went down further in my option after that.

TBF this sounds like something taken from MN advice.

“It’s Christmas Day and me and OH have had massive row. Supposed to having his parents round for dinner, what do I do?”
97 replies:
“Uninvite them, his parents are not your problem!”

My friend who has two kids, one disabled, and also works in a full-on job was telling me about her in-laws descending at Christmas, generally expecting to be waited on hand and foot, taking over the place, making a mess, and generally she and DH running round after them when they both really needed a break. I felt so angry for them that her DH's relatives could be so thoughtless and rude.

For years we avoided my partners family Christmas for three reasons.
The cold buffet lunch, a lack of alcohol and the inevitable randoms invited by SIL from her new age church.
One year we relented at the last minute on the day (we were generally on call anyway) and took along our smallish but top quality baked ham and turkey as well as a tray of potatoes.
SIL bought along a chicken from the local drive through chicken joint, her ravenous husband, four teenage boys and two rotund grown up church goers. Oh, and two pints of chocolate milk.
Occupied by jobs assigned by the elderly aunts, we finally took a seat only find 90% of the food including the ham and turkey all gone.
I think I scored some salad, a chicken leg and a glass of coke.

It's not as bad as some but my uncle stayed one Christmas. He knocked some orange juice over in the fridge (knew it was him as no-one else had been in there) and never said anything. It went everywhere.

The last Xmas before me and my ex officially split (we were separated but trying to make it work at this point) my dad died on Xmas day while I was at work. He picked me up from work and dropped me at the door of the house with the 3 kids all under the age of 5 and fucked off and left me. I've since learnt he went to the other womans house where he was actually living, not at his brothers like he told me. I've never liked Christmas since

In fact he ruined last Xmas too when he hadn't bothered to see or ask about the kids for 6 weeks then sent me a nasty email calling me all the names under the sun because he couldn't see the kids. He hadn't even asked! Dont think ill have any bother this year at least!