To ask about the severity of my DS's possible ASD

[EveryAction]

Hi everyone, I have a lovely DS who is 2y10m and speech and language delayed and possibly ASD. I know none of you can tell me if it would be mild or severe, but I'm going to ask for your opinions anyway and maybe some of you could share your own experiences with me. So, DS ..

• Points to request things, starting at 2y7m
• Understands and follows instructions from his daily routine, shoes on/let's go/meal time/bedtime/etc etc
• Does babble and has recently started saying a few simple words in context, for ex, "shoes", "uh oh", "here" (when handing me something). He doesn't use his words too often yet, but I'm over the moon that he has started :-)
• Great fine and gross motor skills
• Great sleeper
• Great attachment to me
• Pretend feeds me with his toys, dances with me when I play the guitar, walks like a crab and hysterically laughs when I say "I'm a pinchy crab" (don't ask) 😂. Plays peekaboo etc with his sis and loves bouncing about on the trampoline with her
• imitates scenes/actions off Peppa pig all the time, he's got a great eye for detail actually!
• Loves toys and playing with them
• Feeds himself for the most part and can drink out of an open cup no problem etc
• Will now walk holding my hand instead of running off all the time

I've saved the not so positive stuff til last as I hate talking negatively about my gorgeous boy. But here goes ..

• Obviously the speech and language delay
• Sensory issues with having his nappy changed and wearing certain clothes, hates wearing a coat etc
• Ignores all other children apart from his sister and prefers to play alone
• Mostly ignores strangers when they talk to him
• Appears in his own world although does interact with us at home
• Sometimes looks at things from the corners of his eyes and sometimes spins

That's all I can think of right now, thanks for reading everyone and hope you've all had a great weekend ..

It is very hard to say. Speech can come later if at all. But for some children I know they spoke later but then in whole sentences.

@EveryAction

Hi everyone, I have a lovely DS who is 2y10m and speech and language delayed and possibly ASD. I know none of you can tell me if it would be mild or severe, but I'm going to ask for your opinions anyway and maybe some of you could share your own experiences with me. So, DS ..

• Points to request things, starting at 2y7m
• Understands and follows instructions from his daily routine, shoes on/let's go/meal time/bedtime/etc etc
• Does babble and has recently started saying a few simple words in context, for ex, "shoes", "uh oh", "here" (when handing me something). He doesn't use his words too often yet, but I'm over the moon that he has started :-)
• Great fine and gross motor skills
• Great sleeper
• Great attachment to me
• Pretend feeds me with his toys, dances with me when I play the guitar, walks like a crab and hysterically laughs when I say "I'm a pinchy crab" (don't ask) 😂. Plays peekaboo etc with his sis and loves bouncing about on the trampoline with her
• imitates scenes/actions off Peppa pig all the time, he's got a great eye for detail actually!
• Loves toys and playing with them
• Feeds himself for the most part and can drink out of an open cup no problem etc
• Will now walk holding my hand instead of running off all the time

I've saved the not so positive stuff til last as I hate talking negatively about my gorgeous boy. But here goes ..

• Obviously the speech and language delay
• Sensory issues with having his nappy changed and wearing certain clothes, hates wearing a coat etc
• Ignores all other children apart from his sister and prefers to play alone
• Mostly ignores strangers when they talk to him
• Appears in his own world although does interact with us at home
• Sometimes looks at things from the corners of his eyes and sometimes spins

That's all I can think of right now, thanks for reading everyone and hope you've all had a great weekend ..

It will probably be mild. For Moderate I wouldn’t expect more sensory issues, no imitation, and absence seizures. For severe I would expect close to zero social interaction / communication.

would

As you said, no one can tell you. Also, needs can change over time so a child who might seem to have only mild difficulty may find themselves severely unable to function as a teen.

It's very hard to say. Sending love to you. He sounds very sweet. I have a 15 year old DS with ASD. He's in mainstream school, predicted decent grades at GCSE, has a small but nice group of friends. It's very difficult to see them struggle, but you definitely celebrate their every achievement.

Sounds like my middle dc when he was that age. He was referred to the paediatrician as I suspected asd. He was diagnosed with speech delay.
His speech came on really well around 3-4. He still doesn't open his mouth fully when talking but apart from that he is like any other neuro - typical dc now in mainstream school.

Ironically, his younger brother showed hardly any signs of asd and has since been diagnosed with asd, adhd and emotional dysregulation and attends a special school.

With the right support I hope your ds's speech improves quickly

Thanks for both of your responses. Of course I love and accept my little boy however he is but the not knowing is tough. No, I wouldn't say he has any more sensory issues than those other than he doesn't like going on the swings at the park (but enjoys watching other people on them) :-) not sure if that really counts as a sensory issue or if he just isn't a fan of the swings. He can be a bit particular, he still has a bedtime bottle and only wants to drink out of his favourite bottle, would even notice if the teat is different and has his favourite little jumper he likes but will wear other ones etc

My DD has fairly moderate ASC. She is now 7. At 2yr10m she:

No speech
No joint attention
No interaction with me or children or adults
No imaginative play
Wouldn't respond to her name
Quite significant sensory difficulties.

She wouldn't have been able to do most of your list

Now at 7 her speech is very echoliacic, still limited peer interest, major speech and language issues, very limited social awareness, significant sensory issues. I can't forsee her living independently.

It is so so hard to tell though. My 5 year old is also ASC but much milder and akin to how you describe your boy

It will probably be mild. For Moderate I wouldn’t expect more sensory issues, no imitation, and absence seizures. For severe I would expect close to zero social interaction / communication.

What are your professional credential for such a sweeping statement?

Pretend feeds me with his toys That bought a smile to my face. My DS (Aspergers) used to open my mouth and put his sweets in and then open my mouth to take them back out again! His idea of sharing I guess .

Like your DS, mine could say some words and I was the only one who actually understood what he meant.

Your DS sounds lovely. Good luck on your journey xx

A lot of what you've put could simply be normal 2 year old behaviour. It's really as your child gets older that if ASD is applicable you'll start to notice more obvious differences between him and his peers.

From what you've put though, if it does turn out to be ASD, it doesn't seem to be very severe. At 2 years old I always regard how well the child understands as more significant than speech.

As Pookie has just said though the situation can change over time. Our daughter has ADHD and ASD. As a young child the ADHD was very prominent in her behaviour. Now as a teen a lot of the ADHD behaviour seems to have reduced but the ASD traits are becoming much more obvious.

As an example at age 5 most people thought my eldest child was just a little quirky and people would remark he reminded them of a mini Sheldon Cooper. He is now in his teens and attends a specialist school. He is unlikely to gain any qualifications (at least not in Y11). He struggles to cope with all aspects of life.

My youngest child at age 5 was extremely challenging. We were completely at the end of our tether. Over the past few years he has come on leaps and bounds and I don’t worry so much about his future.

My DS2 had no speech til 4-5 (and incomprehensible to outsiders til he was about 9) Can't remember him pointing or shared attention (and still isn't great) NEVER played with a toy. Ever.
Wasn't particularly attached to anything or anyone..I could have left him with any strangers!
Went to Special school. Speech came, now he never stops talking . No GCSEs (has mild/mod learning disabilties) but has an incredible almost photographic memory for anything that interests him (mostly supermarkets around the world Went on to Special Needs College

And now as a 24 year old, has had a job with a supermarket for 5 years, is adored by his cistomers, and is very very good at his job on the checkout! He won't live independently (will always need support) but he has a friend from school, he is happy, friendly in his own unique way and has a good quality of life and more savings that I do

If you had told me this when he was 2.. not talking (or walking either!) lining up crayons on the floor..I'd have cried and not believed you.

You just can't tell how a child with ASD is going to grow. BUT your son sounds like he has some really good positives..emerging speech, play skills, interaction...
Hang in there and let him suprise you :) xx

Thanks everyone for all your brill comments. I've loved reading each and every one .. I forgot to add that my son doesn't seem to have any meltdowns but can throw a wonderful tantrum when he is told the word NO 😂 always stops though if you give him what he wants (which obviously I don't do .. Mostly ). It's hard as he's also 2 and I'm trying not to look at everything as a "potential ASD trait" time will tell I guess :-) xx

It's hard OP my DD is autistic & high functioning, unfortunately even though for some people she is "mildly" affected that doesn't mean that autism doesn't affect every aspect of her life in some way or that her distress is less.

However she leads a fairly happy and content life, it's easy to get fixated as I have done similar on what they will be like as they age and worrying about them but it isn't really helpful.

Easier said than done though not to worry.

It all sounds like normal 2yo behaviour except for the speech delay. But my kids were quick to talk but extremely delayed with gross motorskills :p...

Just keep your eye on it but don't stress about it as we all develop in our own time.

Sounds very like my DD at that age- she’s just turned 4 now.

Speech has come on massively, but still very delayed. She’s just started at mainstream preschool and loves it- she’s come on hugely socially and with her concentration since starting, and the school have no concerns with her carrying on into the primary unit with the right supports. No behavioural issues, very chill and easy going.

We’ve been told by a few health care professionals that she doesn’t seem to have any learning difficulties, and she was a dream to potty train at 3.

The progress she’s made over the last 6-12 months has been huge and DH and I are almost excited to see what she achieves next.

It’s impossible to say really. My son had lots of good points as a small child. He was so “good”, no demands, never had any sort of meltdown. He was most just silent, didn’t understand any commands at all. Played alone, was oblivious to others except us. At home he was very interactive, copying and wanting us to play with him. He was considered “mild” and barely met the criteria for autism. He was initially diagnosed with a communication disorder/autism.

Up until puberty he was the easiest child ever. He’s 22 now, his diagnosis now is severe autism with severe learning disabilities with epilepsy thrown into the mix when he was 14. He’s still non verbal and has very little understanding.

My nephew, who also has autism was the other way round. He’s 24, clearly autistic but talks and is very bright and articulate. He’s considered moderate.

It’s hard to tell and also quite hard to always characterise ‘mild’ to ‘severe’ with autism, despite the name it’s not a neat spectrum. My DS struggles in some ways but not others and a lot of autistic children are so opposite to him in every way yet are equally ‘impacted’ by their condition

@StillMedusa

My DS2 had no speech til 4-5 (and incomprehensible to outsiders til he was about 9) Can't remember him pointing or shared attention (and still isn't great) NEVER played with a toy. Ever. Wasn't particularly attached to anything or anyone..I could have left him with any strangers! Went to Special school. Speech came, now he never stops talking . No GCSEs (has mild/mod learning disabilties) but has an incredible almost photographic memory for anything that interests him (mostly supermarkets around the world Went on to Special Needs College

And now as a 24 year old, has had a job with a supermarket for 5 years, is adored by his cistomers, and is very very good at his job on the checkout! He won't live independently (will always need support) but he has a friend from school, he is happy, friendly in his own unique way and has a good quality of life and more savings that I do

If you had told me this when he was 2.. not talking (or walking either!) lining up crayons on the floor..I'd have cried and not believed you.

You just can't tell how a child with ASD is going to grow. BUT your son sounds like he has some really good positives..emerging speech, play skills, interaction...
Hang in there and let him suprise you :) xx

My nephew sounds very similar to your son. He too is 24 and has a job at a library. He loves it, knows all the book titles, who wrote them and knows exactly where they are!

My DH works with children with autism and we’ve had a few family and friends who’s children were diagnosed with ASD at age 4/5. DH has always spotted it at around age 2. Telltale signs (other that what you have mentioned) are obsessions with something (e.g. trains, rockets,race cars) and knowing about these things in fine detail, late potty training, food fussiness (worse than your average toddler), walking on tiptoes, and hand flapping.

I'm afraid nobody can predict outcomes - some kids gain skills rapidly, others don't. Just keep working with what he can do every day.

@DietrichandDiMaggio

It will probably be mild. For Moderate I wouldn’t expect more sensory issues, no imitation, and absence seizures. For severe I would expect close to zero social interaction / communication.

What are your professional credential for such a sweeping statement?

Hi there iirc Ozanj is a nursery manager, I respect her opinions. Ofc, as we all know, not everyone is who they say they are on the internet.

Can we not do the mild v severe thing? As your child grows so will his abilities. Strengths and weaknesses. I know there is a place for functioning labels somewhere but when you are talking about a 2 year old child I think it's vital to understand that his needs now are unlikely to be the same in a years time, or 2, 3 etc.

Well I have two children with ASD. One is very “mild” and the other goes to a complex needs school so have had both ends of the spectrum! Obviously ASD every child is different but your son sounds similar if not more able than my oldest child at his age. He goes to mainstream, full speech, great footballer. If you didn’t know him you couldn’t tell but unfortunately he has been very violent through the years with his meltdowns and tbh he has been my most challenging child because of it. My other one just potters about doing his own thing and is super content. So having “mild” ASD doesn’t mean the impact is mild. It was huge.

But thanks fully at 10 he’s doing ok. Xx