AIBU to wonder when the baby pictures stop?!

[violetskiss]

I want to preface this by saying this is mostly lighthearted …

My sister had her first baby in September. She’s the first baby in the family and is completely wonderful, we all obviously love her to bits. HOWEVER - since then the family WhatsApp group has been flooded constantly by baby pics!!! I honestly mean we get 5 or 6 every day, and because they’re on a group chat there’s such a pressure to respond to all of them - there’s only so many emojis I can send or times I can type that she’s the cutest baby in the world (which of course she is!!)

I don’t mind this really and understand it won’t be forever, but can anyone tell me when I can expect my dsis to calm down with the pictures and let the group chat regain some normality?! I miss the memes and chatting about what we’re off to do at the weekend!! I know my dbro is feeling the same, although obviously we would never say anything and will of course always respond with the appropriate coos!

You could spam back with pictures of your car… or your food…

But that is a slow process til she gets the message

Best to just stop responding all the time. Phase it down to once a day. And keep putting up memes and responding to them.

Or you could make a joke and say your phone gallery is full of downloaded pics.

We made a private Instagram for our baby for close friends and family only and then they can pick and chose when they look and we have all the photos to look back on.

Don't know how you'd suggest this to them though

I agree with you - it’s so tiresome. I recently deleted Instagram because it suddenly had become baby gram and all my feed and stories were friends’ babies. When I’m feeling more empathic I realise that parents are pushed for time and it’s easier to send or post photos than actually get in touch with people and talk to them, but it does defy the convention of conversation and I find it really boring. I don’t have children or a niece or nephew though, just cousins’ babies and friends’ babies.

Oh gosh! I have a WhatsApp chat that my husband and my parents are in and I spam it constantly with pics of our 10week old! My parents like it though as they get to see her daily. I don’t think I’d do it in a chat with more than them in, maybe a photo if is an occasion?

I think it’s so hard as a new parent to remember that not everyone is as gaga about your baby as you are 😂 but no, I don’t think you’re unreasonable at all! just don’t respond to all the pics and she hopefully will slow down!

We get pictures/short video most Sundays, 18 months. Extra on special firsts. A good balance.

Oh please don't set up a WhatsApp group without her, she probably thinks you all love the pictures and she also probably already feels crap about not having much else to talk about apart from the baby. That would be so hurtful.

Varies by person tbh.

Send pics back. My brother did this when I sent pics of baby trying to smile, similar facial expressions (piss taking git lol).

@SmellyOldOwls

Oh please don't set up a WhatsApp group without her, she probably thinks you all love the pictures and she also probably already feels crap about not having much else to talk about apart from the baby. That would be so hurtful.

This is very true. Motherhood for most of us is very lonely unfortunately

I send about that many some days, because my parents genuinely want them. There's no pressure to respond though, it's just a photo dump.

Are you sure you're not putting the pressure to respond on yourself?

Our family WhatsApp group is actually entitled "Babies"! I set it up the day before I had my twins (now 21 months), and it just evolved into the general family chat.
I only send a baby pic about one a fortnight though. Too busy to even take photos of the babies, never mind post about them!

I used to be the spammer - sorry! I think I stopped taking so many when baby started walking, at that age they won’t stop and pose for pictures anymore so it’s just the odd video usually if they do something funny, maybe once a week. With DC2 who is a small baby, I have noticed I might only send one or two pictures a week when I might have sent 2 or 3 a day with DC1. The replies have petered out for me too and I know at least one of my siblings has muted the chat, but I don’t mind as I don’t expect a reply, I just post them for when people have a minute to flick through them!

It's like war.
It never ends.

It's boring being at home with a baby. Photos makes you think you are doing some kind of important ethnography rather than dying inside. Why don't you suggest she gets into scrap booking instead so she can then show you the finished result after a whole year, or online scrapbooking so it's reduced to maybe once a week.

5 or 6 pics a day? Jesus! I have a 3 year old and text about 3 photos a month to family. That's plenty imo!

Our family chat is full of cat pictures and no it won't ever stop.

Same with babies I'm afraid

Because the cuteness is the only good bit about early parenthood? Since (albeit temporarily) your sleep, diet, social life, body, relationship have all gone down the toilet?

Saying that, SIL gives us actual photo books of her DS (I have one almost exactly the same age) . At least digital pics don't clutter up the house.

They probably won't!
Same boat here, videos too, soon it'll be, walking, fed themselves, ooh look Xmas outfit, etc. Every milestone shared and everything in between! 😊😊

@WomanStanleyWoman

Mute it and check in a couple of times a day. Throw in the odd ‘Awwh, so cute 🥰’ to make it look like you’re paying attention.

I do this!😇🤣

I had a baby in September too and send lots of pics via watsapp most days. My family live 4 hours away and so have only seen my baby once. My sister had her first baby in August and she too sends pics most days. I love seeing pics of my nephew. My other brother and sister don't have kids and are probably like you. They send emoji and respond as much or as little as they want.

I've muted my main friend group whatsapp for this exact reason. It's been 3 years so far and I'm still getting 5-10 photos a day of their kids... you have my sympathies, there's no socially acceptable way to say "They look exactly the same as they did yesterday, but thanks!" to baby photos

My sil does this with photos of her kids, now 3 and 6 years. Up to 20 photos of a day out etc in one go. I reduced my commenting a year ago, now just respond for birthdays etc, and noticed that other family members did similar, and eventually she reduced the frequency a bit, but still get absolutely photo bombed for special occasions. I probably post one or two pics on a year, but people like this don't always take the hint. I've probably annoyed her as she's ignored a couple of recent direct messages I've sent 😬. I do think it's a bit rude and blinkered to assume everyone wants constant photos of your family though.

If you all have iPhones or iPads, she could set up a shared photo album? Then it keeps the photos out of the chat, people can like or comment if they wish without you getting a ridiculous amount of notifications and you don't even have to have notifications that photos have been added.

There is an app called family album which shows which month and year a picture was posted and can be shared with all the family who can also upload pictures this may help

My sibling who did this, stopped when their dc2 came along (aside from the newborn photos of dc2). So, 2 whole years.
I think they finally “got it”. PFB and all that. And also that others had babies after them too, so I imagine they suddenly realised how irritating it was