Inappropriate interview questions

[30andgrey]

I just turned down a job offer because I deemed these questions inappropriate….AIBU?

1. How many times have you been on maternity leave during your current employment?

2. What are the details of your childcare arrangements?

3. What does a normal day look like for you in terms of balancing raising a young family and a senior post?

The above questions were asked in a telephone conversation after a panel interview.

Anyone else think these are extremely discriminatory?

I turned down the offer that was 4 pay scales higher than my current role because it seemed like they were asking me to prioritise work if it came to it and I had to go over and above to assure them that being a parent would not hinder my ability to do the role.

Would love to know if I’m an idiot for turning down a whopping pay increase or if I am reasonable for thinking it would have been a nightmare to work for an organisation with this mindset.

Don't hire women of childbearing age @swissmodel, they'll get pregnant and need ML. Even if they don't they'll be hormonal several days a month.
As they get older they'll be perimenoupausal or menopausal.
Just hire men. Much easier.

Obviously, you might be a woman, in which case what on earth are you thinking? Running a business? Don't you need a penis to do that?

ANYONE can 'throw things into disarray a year from now' in the world of work, for any reason.

Exactly, at least with maternity leave you have time to plan for that cover. If someone gets ill or injured you often just have to deal with it as it happens and don't often have a fixed return date.

As a matter of fact I'm a real employer, albeit not a restaurant owner.

Me too - or I was until the company was acquired.

It was acquired because it was successful. It was successful because of its culture. Its culture embraced the notion that our people’s lives were important. That importance involved them having families as well as a job. Recognising that dual priority promoted loyalty, employee retention, commitment. All of which led to success.

Sure, maternity leave required us to accommodate and plan. So does unexpected illness, study leave and the desire to sod off for a year and bum around Africa. But good people are gold dust, and the payback an employer gets from being sympathetic to such life events far outweighs the managerial effort of making them possible - and you don’t need a law to see that, nor should you.

@30andgrey

I did exactly this, I declined and explained that such questions did not have anything to do with my competency to do the role and they could be deemed discriminatory.

I had a reply that said that this suggestion is “baseless and insulting”

I think I made the right choice.

OP did you answer the questions on the phone, and then decline the offer, only then adding the comment about the questions?

I'm just interested to find out if they still
Offered you the job despite refusing to answer the questions

Anyway the questions are unlawful and sex discrimination

Many years ago my boss had 3 years off on Mat leave, different children. She was an egg doner - yes more leave. Multiple family deaths. Time off. She had maximum sick leave and holiday leave. She did maximum and more of everything. When on holidays, (all of the years I was there)She’d have a cold and therefore had to extend her holiday. She’d arrive late as taking her children to GP., go to nativity events etc
Children sick, yes working from home.
Had she been asked these questions at interview, and answered truthfully, then many would not have been overworked - doing her job.
Sad as it seems, sometimes these questions are necessary.

@swissmodel

"Answer me this, imagine you're an employer and you can hire 2 equally qualified candidates, would you go for the one who poses a risk of throwing things into disarray a year from now, or would you go with the seemingly steady candidate?"

As I'm not a discriminatory prick, I would go for the best person for the job regardless if they are male, female or whatever. If they went off on ML then I would deal with that as any responsible employer would - something which you are clearly not.

@Dnaltocs

Many years ago my boss had 3 years off on Mat leave, different children. She was an egg doner - yes more leave. Multiple family deaths. Time off. She had maximum sick leave and holiday leave. She did maximum and more of everything. When on holidays, (all of the years I was there)She’d have a cold and therefore had to extend her holiday. She’d arrive late as taking her children to GP., go to nativity events etc Children sick, yes working from home. Had she been asked these questions at interview, and answered truthfully, then many would not have been overworked - doing her job. Sad as it seems, sometimes these questions are necessary.

She was a piss-taker who used kids as one of her excuses to shirk. She wasn't a piss-taker BECAUSE she had kids. I had a boss who was similar in the sense of always being off/late/unavailable. They didn't have dependent children, so didn't use those reasons, but the others you list – deaths and family crises, sick leave, sick-on-holiday leave – I used to hear all these and more. Should the employer have asked/known to ask questions pertaining to this behaviour at interview? My boss was a man, if that makes a difference.

@Dnaltocs

Many years ago my boss had 3 years off on Mat leave, different children. She was an egg doner - yes more leave. Multiple family deaths. Time off. She had maximum sick leave and holiday leave. She did maximum and more of everything. When on holidays, (all of the years I was there)She’d have a cold and therefore had to extend her holiday. She’d arrive late as taking her children to GP., go to nativity events etc Children sick, yes working from home. Had she been asked these questions at interview, and answered truthfully, then many would not have been overworked - doing her job. Sad as it seems, sometimes these questions are necessary.

A) do you think your boss had she been asked at interview would have replied ' yeah I'll be milking mat leave and sick leave as much as I can'....?

B) the solution to anyone who takes the piss is disciplinary or ill health retirement. Not use it to justify asking unlawful discriminatory questions at interview.

I agree

I agree that Boss was not ideal and unfortunately female, giving others a bad press.

I wouldn’t have taken the job either

9 years ago I interviewed at a corporate firm. At the time my then husband was on tour in Afghanistan. The director interviewed me, he asked how I'd cope if my husband died.

I was gobsmacked.

Unlawful and highly offensive.

I worked in the public sector for many years and we were not allowed to ask any questions such as this.

Absolutely discriminatory! And totally inappropriate. You can pretty much guarantee that male candidates would not be asked those questions. I would feedback to them.

You have cut your nose off to spite your face. Firstly you could have taken the job and ignored the fact that you didn't like their questions. Secondly if it's a high ranking job it's reasonable to not have you constantly late / off / juggling small people.

Secondly if it's a high ranking job it's reasonable to not have you constantly late / off / juggling small people.

To be clear, you're saying that a parent shouldn't have a 'high ranking job'? Really?

@Brieandcamembert

You have cut your nose off to spite your face. Firstly you could have taken the job and ignored the fact that you didn't like their questions. Secondly if it's a high ranking job it's reasonable to not have you constantly late / off / juggling small people.

Ah another example of how alive and well misogyny still is!

1. the question was excruciatingly telling of the culture and you shouldn't want to work for a company like that

2. you're labouring under the assumption that a person with offspring wouldn't be able to commit which is both fundamentally wrong and insulting on a number of levels

3. re point 2 - all those men in the office in high ranking roles with children...do you assume they won't be able to commit??

4. IT. IS. ILLEGAL.

I don't think they are allowed to ask about family commitments. It seems that it is only women who are asked such questions so it is discriminatory.

It's interesting that anyone who tried to answer my question why is it fair, simply replied that it's legal. It might be legal for a six foot six adult male bodybuilder to self identify as female and enter women sports, but is that fair?

Imagine if there was no law that a position must be kept open for someone on ML, and you were trying to persuade parliament or a business that this is the fair and right thing to do, what would be your argument?

To me it seems eminently unfair that a business ha to keep the position open for 6-12 months while an employee goes on ML. I'm all for the government supporting women who take ML by paying their wages (with our taxes), as that is a societal obligation for the greater good. But it shouldn't be the responsibility of any single business to facilitate an employee's procreation.

Why should it be? And before anyone brings up long-term illness once again, actually why should that be the employer's responsibility? Why?

@swissmodel

It's interesting that anyone who tried to answer my question why is it fair, simply replied that it's legal.

It’s interesting that you didn’t respond to the one post that addressed the issue from an employer’s perspective.

To make the point explicit - parental leave is fair because companies aren’t just money-making machines, they’re part of the fabric of society and intrinsic to the well-being of all involved. It’s fair because it opens up access to careers to everyone in that society, which leads to a wider pool of skills and experience from which employers can recruit. And it’s fair because in the end it’s beneficial to the employer, for the reasons I gave in my previous post.

@swissmodel I did. You haven't responded. I'll wait...

If the only way you can afford to be in business is to screw over women then maybe you cant afford to be in business.

Secondly if it's a high ranking job it's reasonable to not have you constantly late / off / juggling small people.

Just because you have children doesn't mean you are constantly late or taking time off. The vast majority of parents are capable of juggling a job and being a parent and many organisations are capable of offering enough flexibility to allow people to do this.

Or do you just think parents shouldn't have high ranking jobs?

swissmodel why do you think it fair for women to be discriminated against for having children?

There is plenty of research that shows having a diverse workforce and decent policies around maternity/paternity/sick leave and flexible working is actually good for business. Staff are more productive and loyal.
You are employing people not robots.

@Dnaltocs

I agree that Boss was not ideal and unfortunately female, giving others a bad press.

So basically you're judging all working mothers on the behaviour of one person?