Inappropriate interview questions

[30andgrey]

I just turned down a job offer because I deemed these questions inappropriate….AIBU?

1. How many times have you been on maternity leave during your current employment?

2. What are the details of your childcare arrangements?

3. What does a normal day look like for you in terms of balancing raising a young family and a senior post?

The above questions were asked in a telephone conversation after a panel interview.

Anyone else think these are extremely discriminatory?

I turned down the offer that was 4 pay scales higher than my current role because it seemed like they were asking me to prioritise work if it came to it and I had to go over and above to assure them that being a parent would not hinder my ability to do the role.

Would love to know if I’m an idiot for turning down a whopping pay increase or if I am reasonable for thinking it would have been a nightmare to work for an organisation with this mindset.

Although they are not supposed to ask those questions, and typical day sounds a very odd one to ask, it sound like you were the candidate they really wanted and they were trying to reassure themselves that your family would not be any sort of barrier to you undertaking the role. You should definitely give feedback as to why you didn’t accept the job.

I know in education when I've been involved in recruiting we had to keep a list of the questions (everyone asked the same of course, although tangential points of conversation based on what the interviewee said can also be fine), brief notes of the responses, and the scores we each gave. So if this is the case in other sectors then it would be very easy for the company to prove they asked the same questions of male interviewees, should they be challenged by anyone officially down the line. And if it isn't normal elsewhere then it's one of the few things that education recruitment does well 😂

I bet they didn't ask them.

All discriminatory. I was just interviewed and the interviewer described it being a really demanding role that needed lots of flexibility and working weekends and late nights, then asked "What's your personal situation - are you married, do you have children".
I had to answer "I don't have children, but I'm afraid my home life is very important to me and if you want someone to work every hour under the sun, I'm not the candidate for you".

Technically, it is not illegal, being a parent is not a protected characteristic.

I think they were giving a fair and clear warning that the position is incompatible with having family responsibilities. I am actually quite grateful when potential clients / employers do this, it just means we are not a match. Much worse than taking a job because they were afraid to discriminate against you and then find out that there's 20 hours of work to be done every weekend for an early Monday meeting.

@LittleDandelionClock

I know you didn’t ask me, but here are a couple of sources. There are probably better ones out there but I only had a few minutes to Google some.

www.citation.co.uk/news/hr-and-employment-law/sex-discrimination-during-interviews/

www.citizensadvice.org.uk/law-and-courts/discrimination/discrimination-because-of-sex-or-sexual-orientation/discrimination-because-of-sex/

[quote LittleDandelionClock]@30andgrey

Of COURSE it's a bit shit, but tbf, a woman (who has school age children) IS going to be more of a liability to many employers than a man.

People say 'well you know they wouldn't have asked a man that!' Well of course they wouldn't, because their job and the ability to do it, isn't going to be affected by babies/young children as much as a woman.

A bitter pill to swallow, and for people to admit, but it's true. A man isn't going to go off for a year on maternity leave (and possibly never return) is he? And a man isn't going to be called out every other week because the kid is ill, or the childminder is ill and needs the kid to be picked up. And a man isn't going to be taking time off to spend time with the sick child.

You can all argue differently, but as I said, rightly or wrongly, many employers see women - especially child bearing age - as much more of a liability than a man... So yep, a woman is far more likely to be asked these questions. Not great and not nice, but understandable IMO.

@Decaffe

All three of those questions are illegal.

Do you have a source for this statement?[/quote]
Not great, not nice, but understandable!

No it’s not understandable. It’s bloody offensive and no ones else’s business. I work in a very male dominated sector and no one asked about my childcare arrangements. I have arranged meetings where (male) managers have requested we meet after 9.30am as they are doing the school run or can we avoid Friday morning, as it’s school assembly. I accommodate it without question, as I value those members of staff - whether they are male or female and if we can be flexible to accommodate people, then it makes for a better work place.

Employers who ask women questions about childcare, maternity leave etc, will end up missing out on some really excellent candidates, due to their ignorance. An employer who is fair, flexible and looks after all their employees will have a lower turnover of staff, therefore saving money in the long term on recruitment and training costs.

If only women get asked questions about maternity, childcare etc, then it is illegal (Equality Act 2010).

Were you interviewed by a timetravelling interviewer from 1973? The maternity leave question is clearly discriminatory since it's asking about a protected characteristic, and the assumptions behind the other two questions are clearly sexist (for LittleDandelionClock, I know several women whose answers to those questions would be 'my husband is a SAHP and does the childcare'). Please tell HR that these discriminatory question are why you have turned down the job offer since while they were not relevant to you they did suggest a company culture that is inherently discriminatory and does not value diversity.

The one about childcare could be okay, if they ask absolutely everyone. Unfortunately being a parent isn't a protected characteristic. But the maternity leave one definitely is discriminatory. I would get a solicitor to threaten them and they'll probably pay you off and retrain the people involved. Very bad.
I've had the same thing happen to me, but in hindsight I'm very glad to be working somewhere where my children are considered part of the package and not a hindrance (especially during the pandemic when they attended more than a few work meetings on zoom).

From my experience it's perfectly normal. They need to know who they are hiring.
They can't be supportive of your situation if they don't know. You were silly to turn it down!

@forinborin

Technically, it is not illegal, being a parent is not a protected characteristic.

I think they were giving a fair and clear warning that the position is incompatible with having family responsibilities. I am actually quite grateful when potential clients / employers do this, it just means we are not a match. Much worse than taking a job because they were afraid to discriminate against you and then find out that there's 20 hours of work to be done every weekend for an early Monday meeting.

Asking only women those questions and not men, makes it illegal. Sex is a protected characteristic.

You don’t advertise that the role is ‘incompatible with having family responsibilities’ as this could be seen as indirect discrimination. It’s not rocket science. You advertise the role for example:

Hours of work are 48 hours a week
Unsociable hours, with a 1am start and weekend work every weekend.

People then make their own mind up on whether they apply for the role or not.

@Gymohithoughtyousaidgin

From my experience it's perfectly normal. They need to know who they are hiring. They can't be supportive of your situation if they don't know. You were silly to turn it down!

Being supportive is a follow up conversation after they have offered you the job in writing about flexible working. This isn't being supportive.

I think you've done the right thing here turning this down. I'm my experience if they're treating you differently because of your gender from the get go then you'd spend the whole time at this company trying to get out the box they've put you in. Very wise to turn them down imho. Sounds like working there would have been an unbelievably frustrating mindboggling shitshow

Difficult to say because how do you genuinely know that they didn’t ask everyone that? Personally I think you’ve just done yourself out of a great job which is a real shame.

Do you have a source for this statement

It is unlawful under the Equality Act.
It's not illegal, that would mean it was a criminal offence. But it is discriminatory because they would not ask a man.

YANBU OP.

I attended an interview for a large organisation some years ago now where (despite there being no mention whatsoever on my CV of being a parent/ having children) I was asked - on the assumption that I did - what my childcare arrangements were, how reliable they were, whether I had family to assist me etc.

I said in the interview that I didn't consider the questions were appropriate or relevant - I was not offered the job and the feedback the agency received was that I was unprofessional!

I live in Ireland so laws could be different (but a lot of ours are the same). They cannot ask you if you even have children.

Awful line of questioning. I've been through similar too. In some ways we haven't moved on since the %)'s. You're probably best out of it but it still seems unfair. All the best

@Gymohithoughtyousaidgin

From my experience it's perfectly normal. They need to know who they are hiring. They can't be supportive of your situation if they don't know. You were silly to turn it down!

Why would anyone want to work for a company where discriminatory practises were ‘perfectly normal’.

You must have worked at some crap organisations if you think this is normal.

I have never been asked questions like that in the 35 years I have been working and my managers where I work have all be trained to ensure they don’t ask questions other than the ones that relate directly to the role. So no asking women about children, maternity and child care and no asking men if they are married (this can happen in male dominated sectors, as some people think that if a man is married, he is more sensible and will work harder).

• edit - the 50's.

people think that if a man is married, he is more sensible and will work harder

That is reverse discrimination

It's terrible and I do think you dodged a bullet. As you've already turned them down I'd now complain, no harm in then getting some feedback.

And as for women being more affected by childcare arrangements than men, that's bollocks. Yes, that maybe how some families run their lives, but it's definitely not all, and it can't be presumed by an employer that a mother will be picking up the kids when they're ill etc. rather than a father. My OH deals with emergencies usually as I can't take phone calls at work, and we share time off work if required. He does school drop off, I do pick up etc. If they're not asking the same questions to men and women it is outright discrimination. They shouldn't be asking those sort of questions at all to anybody anyway, as it's really none of the employers business.

I think the last one might be OK, because we all have to engage in balancing acts like this to some extent, and as PPs have said simply being a parent isn't a protected characteristic.

But I would say that the first two questions are illegal:
www.gov.uk/employer-preventing-discrimination/recruitment

www.skillsforcare.org.uk/Documents/Recruitment-and-retention/Values-and-behaviours-based-recruitment/Equal-opportunities-and-interviewing.pdf

The second link refers to the Equality Act 2010 and why questions like this should not be asked at an interview.

@CruellaDeVilla

Discriminatory- complain

They offer her the job and she turned it down !.

I once was interviewed by an international engineering company and I was used to being the only female engineer in the room.
The HR representative held a 1:1 interview with me before the manager. The whole discussion with her was about my thoughts on female roles in the family, how Frenchwomen have different values about parenting than British women(!) and wanted to know where I stood on nannies or childcare. This was all before having children (in fact we thought I couldn’t) and I just said I thought her questions completely inappropriate.
I got called for second interview and turned it down telling them I had no intention of working for a company where they were the attitudes in their HR department. They tried to imply I’d misunderstood ….

The maternity leave question yes definitely seems a bit off. It’s like asking if you plan to be pregnant any time soon. They would not ask a man this.