AIBU to introduce you to Ms. Label Checker

[HappyDays40]

Imagine a busy school playground if you will. It is pissing with rain in the North West of England, just a normal day. Mrs. Last Minute (this is me) has turned her five year old out of the car seconds before we are classed as late and the young ones play in the playground just before Mrs. Perfect Teacher lets them into the school. The parents stand talking waiting for the door to open meaning they can escape and Ms. Label Checker is waiting with her jumper -less of offspring who is pointing his finger at individual children. Upon extension of the finger, Ms. Label Checker pounce s at one of the young prey picking the littlest off first. Within a second she has applied the glasses and is peeling back the neck of the jumper that the young prey is still wearing.
Ahmed squirms weakly under vice like grip of her Salomon as she casts him aside screeching "no not you". Ahmed is followed by Meghan, Reece and Saeed who are similarly cast aside.
The playground is quiet and the young ones wimper and hide behind their parents. In a label checking frenzy Ms. Label Checker reaches for a child named Hannah when one dad valiantly steps in and shouts "not my kid". This send a Spartacus style ripple through the parents who start defendiong the young ones saying " not my child" . Ms. Label Checker is stopped in her tracks, she has no one target and is becoming the prey. Realising the her time is numbered she screeches at the parents to check the labels of their jumpers because Chris has lost the six jumpers she bought at the start of term. Sara's s mum tells Ms. Label Checker that she can't just go around pulling at the kids jumpers and is she bloody nuts?
Ms. Label Checker admits defeat saying that she is sick of other kids stealing Chris's jumpers. Ahmeds auntie Charles around in her bag a produce s s spare jumper saying Chris can have it. Ms. Label Checker has some brass neck, snatches it off Ahmeds mum and rams it on Chris's head stating that is was probably Chris's anyway. Ahmed gracious mum shows M s. Label Checker a name " Ahmed Arif"it read. To which Ms. Label Checker stated " well you can all just fuck off ". And that my friends is the beginning of a story.

OP

Your title filled me with dread, I have a great aunt who I have not seen for decades, but when I was a child she would admire what I was wearing and then check the label before commenting on the item.

I felt like I was being strangled every time I saw her.

Amazing. Can't wait till DD starts school next year 😬

This is why I always sew an E in neon yellow embroidery thread on the back of the (outside) collar and the cuff of all of DS’s school clothes.

I do it small enough that it’s not obvious but clear enough that I can spot it when it’s ‘Missing’ on another child.

I have been known to sew the name label to the ribbing at the bottom left of a jumper. Always do nametapes on the front of sports kit as well as inside. Never lost a jumper after that, but lost quite a few before.

Dd1 says they all used to smell the clothes and get them back to their rightful owner in Primary school too. It’s obviously a thing.

My 2 dcs were terrible at losing jumpers (all named) until I threatened that they had to buy any replacements with their own money, strangely they were able to keep hold of things after that

@Disfordarkchocolate

Having once had a child tell me her Mam 'just takes anyone that fits from lost property' I feel her pain. I'd have loved to have seen this.

This is more or less what I used to do

I'd check lost property for any with DSs name in and if they weren't there I'd look to see if there was one in his size but with no label, take it and then make a donation to the PTA 🤷🏻‍♀️

I used to take all the labels out and donate all his jumpers back once he'd outgrown them so that other parents could do the same ☺️

My ds constantly came home with uniform missing and l have to say there were times when l felt like turning into Ms Label Checker but too polite to dare.
Also as a teacher of 40 years l have never encountered the smell thing. I don't have a great sense of smell but no ne else child or adult has suggested it. Too late learning about it now!!!

@Pennguin my experience was that the children at primary level are just still so physically demanding that there is no air left in the day - its not unusual at home time to be getting 30 kids changed from PE whilst filling book bags retrieving medications and checking the loos for missing lovelies.. Frankly it would tax a team of octopus on speed! Where I worked anyway there was absolutely no air left in the day for this kind of organised return on a regular basis.
We used to open up the school hall occasionally at home time for parents to come and and rummage through.
Also, it's perfectly possible to reunite a child with their cardi whilst they sat on the carpet at home time waiting to be called to the door only to find they've left it behind when they go.

And for anyone wondering, don't worry! All people, not just kids smell. But a TA or Early Years practitioner in particular, is in very close contact with the little ones all day, often for proper stretches of time, 20 mins of reading, supervising a difficult lunchtime, etc, so we do get to know them very well. Which is, most of the time, wonderful. 😊

In our primary school most of the jumpers and coats that get lost are left in the playground. I would have thought it wouldn't take the lunchtime supervisors much time to distribute them to classrooms rather than shove them all in a big box. As parents we're not allowed into school due to covid so you have to rely on a 4/5 year old child in reception to go and search through lost property. I don't think it should be a teacher's job but think it's 5 minutes work for a member of support staff.
Just seems odd that a secondary school with 1000+ students can manage it but a village primary school can't relocate named items between only 7 different classrooms.

If it were up to me I would have all the kids in tracksuits and no changing for PE. It would make everyone's lives easier.

@Pennguin ahh well, that'll be why. I wasn't at a small village school I guess. And before covid too.
Though tbh, I honestly can't see it happening even in a much smaller setting. I found younger children are just more prone to needing intervention following random toilet/scrapey knee type emergencies which make the implementation of any routine difficult, and if you set one up people get more pissed off than is reasonable if it's missed once or twice.
I usually didn't leave the school until after 4/4:30 most days (having stopped being paid at 3:15) as children were regularly picked up late/ran back to change a book/find a lost item/parent wanted a chat etc. If we had 5 minutes spare there were already 5 or 6 things waiting to fill it, very often things which took precedence like filling in a safeguarding form or reporting concerns to the safeguarding lead.

@endofagain COMPLETELY agree.

What is really annoying is when Ms Label Checker comes into the WhatsApp to rant about how many jumpers, cardigans and coats their child has lost. When asked if they were name taped (or even just labelled), they say “No, I didn’t bother”. Oh well then.

@TreeLawney

Love this! The only bit that is inaccurate is the idea that Mrs Label-Checker has named any of the jumpers in the first place.

If I had a pound for every time a parent has demanded I find a jumper then replied ‘no’ to the ‘does it have their name in?’ question, I would no longer be teaching!

SO MUCH THIS!!!!!!

I work in a school and if I find a jumper with no name in I’ll ask one of the boys to sniff it and tell me who it belongs to! The boys tend to be the ones who lose their jumpers. I spend far too much of my time returning coats/jumpers/cardis and looking for ones kids have lost.

Mrs. Label Checker has been unequivocally banished from her antics one of the Spartacus parents. I think Hannah's dad has complained to school about the hovering beast. A letter has gone out over parent pay which is addressed generically stating that children's names should be in their clothes and any matters dealt with by the teachers.
She has taken he campaign for the return of the jumpers an amnesty if you will. She won't ask questions if she sees them back in jumper child's bag by Friday.

@Pennguin

In our primary school most of the jumpers and coats that get lost are left in the playground. I would have thought it wouldn't take the lunchtime supervisors much time to distribute them to classrooms rather than shove them all in a big box. As parents we're not allowed into school due to covid so you have to rely on a 4/5 year old child in reception to go and search through lost property. I don't think it should be a teacher's job but think it's 5 minutes work for a member of support staff. Just seems odd that a secondary school with 1000+ students can manage it but a village primary school can't relocate named items between only 7 different classrooms.

The lunchtime supervisors at our school couldn't match kids to classes by name with any accuracy whatsoever. It'd take ages, and they're not paid after the end of lunchtime.

Maybe if the children had their name and class on the label, but for most parents in my school even getting the name legibly inscribed on an item of clothing is doing well!

One of the mums at the school told me that if her child came home in a jumper without a name in, and it fits, she writes her child’s name in it and steals the jumper. 😬 And even if it has a name in and is in nice condition, she has sometimes just cut it out. 😮

Finding stuff is not the issue. I recover around 15 items a day. The issue is finding the right owner or getting the kids to actually keep them with them and not lose it again 5 minutes after.

Now it's extra hard as we had a sale of lost/donated/kids left school property and half the parents haven't bothered to write the new names in. So here I am with my armful of jumpers,fleeces and cardies. But it says Jimmy on them, and Jimmy left or he's year 6 now and these are 6/7. None of the kids will claim it because it says Jimmy, and they're not Jimmy. They're Adam. And the jumper says Jimmy not Adam. No problem I say.. we'll get the parents have a look. Yes, they lost jumpers. Yes , they bought some in the sale. No they don't remember if they were labelled and they didn't label their kid's name. No, this is not the right jumper because it says Jimmy on it and their kid's name isn't Jimmy. They want the right jumper... the one that's lost, not labelled and they're not sure if it was from the sale or not. But it's definitely not the one that says Jimmy.

Arghhhh

@TracyBeakerSoYeah

DD's reception teacher told us parents that the 4 & 5 yr olds had an interesting way of checking if they had the right top/cardigan/dress etc when getting changed back from doing PE. The children smelt them & always got the right item of clothing back (even the ones that could read or recognise their name written down would smell rather than read the label)

A teacher recently told me the very same thing. Said children did it up to about year 5.

I can't remember having any such sense of smell when I was a child

@HappyDays40

Ahmed was followed by Meghan Reece and Saeed. He was just the first! I hope there wasn't a racial element

Jeeeez you can't do right for doing wrong! If you'd happened to mention only Meghan & Reese, someone would've made a comment about how non-diverse your school was! 🤨🙄

So this is why the TA popped a stacking box full of jumpers down on the playground yesterday at pick up! I did wonder!
My child is in Year 2 and was in Reception when COVID began, so no changing clothes for PE has meant no lost jumpers etc. This thread is eye opening for me!
I'm especially enjoying the little anecdotes from all the Primary teachers on here! :) Cute!

Whilst you're all here, can I just say that most of us parents DO appreciate you & what you do, even if we don't show it! I got an email reply from DC's lovely Year 1 teacher once at 10pm - she'd only just got back from school! Prepping something apparently. I don't know how you all do it, I really don't! 📚

DD (year 4) also told me the other day that they can all tell whose jumper is which by how it smells! She seems to know how each kid in the year smells, even the ones she hardly sees in the other form. Bizarre. I have a good sense of smell but nothing like that!

I love hearing about the little techniques that people have to matching kids with their jumpers. Maybe asnyone woth the nose skills should offer their olfactory skills on a paid basis♥️

My dd (who is now 20) told me recently that in primary school they all used to use smell to know which jumper belonged to who.
She said it was quicker, when faced with a large pile of jumpers, than looking for names on labels; a quick sniff and they knew whose it was.