AIBU to feel there is a lack of hope for this generation?

[floridapalmtree]

Is there any hope for this generation?

My daughter has worked hard through school achieving good exam results. Studied hard at university to get a degree, worked during a placement year. Started work and is working long hours. Living in London paying most of her salary on rent, bills and basic living. Not earning enough to save much each month. It seems impossible to buy a property or start a family. We have encouraged her to work hard to achieve a better life but she is tired, stressed and has little hope for the future. Unless there is a large family injection of cash I can't see how this generation can progress towards a decent life.

You’re not wrong, our generation is the first in 100 years to be passing on a weaker economy, fewer opportunities for social mobility or just as you’ve observed to even just replicate what prior generations have had.

Tbh I'm 38 and moved to London with pennies at 21 after 2 degrees and £40k of debt

My advice

• try and meet a life partner younger if you can share costs inc rent means can save more
• buy a grotty place as soon as you can do not wait as will hold up

Your life progression. 5% deposit is fine. Get a part time job to save up the money needed

• don't blow money travelling clothes glamour. Save for flat

Once bought a property and met someone life is much much more affordable and easier

Oh and get a side gig if you can. Extra £2-5k a year comes in handy.

Nothing has changed in my view from graduating in 2005 to now. Have to face it out and be focussed.

Oh and I'd you want a London career and kids, marry a man who works in IT or banking

Nobody else will earn enough to buy a family home with and afford childcare

Loads of men do both so big pickings! Good luck to your daughter

Tbh I think there’s been quite a change since I moved to London in 2015 so I’m not sure how helpful advice from 2005 is.

The problem is London. We lived just outside London rather than in London but even so everything changed dramatically when we moved 200 miles north in our mid twenties.

Can she not move to a cheaper region than London? Even people on "average" incomes in cheaper areas can usually afford to buy their own home. London is just crazy.

@callingon

Tbh I think there’s been quite a change since I moved to London in 2015 so I’m not sure how helpful advice from 2005 is.

I agree.

It's really not as simple as finding a partner and buying a grotty house. Advice like that ignores the bigger issues, and minimizes how difficult it is for many young people.

I think one of the worst things facing this generation is a frequently prevailing theme of their generation is fucked.

There are places outside London it's possible to still buy in or rent and have a good quality of life- and frankly my family always had to move round for work and previous generation to me downturn that meant emigrating.

I couldn't afford to live bit of UK I grew up in never mind London.

Persuably things will have to reset in London at some point with rents houses - in meantime get London experience then do what many do and move out further or some other bit of UK.

I agree with you, I listen to the slightly younger people than me (mid-late 20s, I'm early 30s) chatting at work and they struggle to be able to afford to rent anywhere in our city, let alone buy.

I was lucky and met DH at 20 but things are still tough - we are in a catch 22 of struggling to buy anywhere local but if we moved away we'd lose the free GP childcare (which is probably worth close to £500 worth of extra nursery sessions.)

@xmasfairy21

Oh and I'd you want a London career and kids, marry a man who works in IT or banking

Nobody else will earn enough to buy a family home with and afford childcare

Loads of men do both so big pickings! Good luck to your daughter

Or daughter could get a job in IT/banking herself 🙃

@xmasfairy21

Oh and I'd you want a London career and kids, marry a man who works in IT or banking

Nobody else will earn enough to buy a family home with and afford childcare

Loads of men do both so big pickings! Good luck to your daughter

So how can you say nothing has changed since graduating in 2005? In 2005 it was VASTLY easier to buy property in London as a single person. And as for your 'advice' to marry a man in IT or banking ...🙄🤔

If she's already feeling like that, then now is the time for her to make changes.
Why choose London, it's expensive and dirty? There are lots of lovely cities in the U.K. Lots of healthier places that offer a better life.
My ds has a better education than me, more confidence, more skills than I had at his age. He has more parental encouragement. People spend so much time saying how hard life is for them but that's not always so.

The advice to marry a prosperous man whilst grinding away working two jobs and saving every penny with no room for enjoyment is depressing.

Is this what it's come down to for our girls? Marry rich and be a drudge?

@xmasfairy21 your internalised misogyny is showing. Might want to tuck it back in.

I started out in London a long time ago, and it was tough then. I always rented places a long walk from the tube/train, as was much cheaper. I couldn't afford a travel card, I used to get the train to the edge of zone 2 and then walk. I bought my first place in a grotty area commutable into London, again a long walk from the train. It would be rare for a single person to be able to afford a property in London imo, without a lot of family help.

There are other places to live and work that are far cheaper than London.

Plenty of cheaper places one hour commute from London

She’s at the very beginning of her career, that’s just the way it is, hopefully she’s chosen a career where she can move up the ladder and start to save. Then she will have to choose between buy where she afford or not to.
It is a worry with house prices though. I started talking to my DD about choosing a career where you can earn a decent wage as soon as her chose her gcse options. I want her to earn her own money and not be reliant on a partner or family.

I agree, it's shit for the next generation, OP. Everything is so much harder for them. Telling people to move to live to a cheaper city is not the answer as the prices just go up there. I'm in Liverpool which used to be one of the cheapest places to buy a house in this country. But everyone has cottoned onto this, resulting in houses in decent areas shooting up in price, shortages of school places, increase in traffic etc. Never mind buying a house, the young people looking for family rentals can't even get to secure one of those as they're gone as soon as they're advertised.

I think back to the plethora of jobs that was available when I graduated in the mid 90s, the very low house prices, availability of decent rentals and think how different things have got. I work in a school and feel sad that the young teachers work so hard and such long hours just to live in a tiny rented flat, with no hope of being able to afford to take a couple of years out to care for their own babies.

It's not misogyny it's realism
If you want to live in London long term need to be a high earner yourself and / or marry someone who is a high earner
That's the reality

Nothing misogynistic about it

Like others say people I know in their 20s have bought flats here and outside London (Surrey / Essex), usually mid 20s 1/ both of the couple are on £50k plus.

It is do-able.

I don't know, I see a great future ahead for DD and her partner, (20 and 21).
They already rent a lovely flat, are both studying for careers that will pay well, and I see no reason for them not to have a good life, they already do considering their ages.
No parental help either, both brought up by single Mums in HA homes on a low wage, or in my case, disability benefits.
On top of that Dd is a care leaver.

My DD1 and DS1 are similar to your DD but excited to embark on the rest of their lives. DD has just bought her first home. No where near London though, that may be your DD's problem.

Oh, and wages are stagnating in many areas. It's a shock if you put your first shitty wage into the Bank of England inflation calculator and see what salary the same job SHOULD be now, had wages increased with inflation.

I haven't got time for people who say "oh I used to just walk in from Zone 2" or "my first flat was grotty". Then, you could do that and know that your situation would improve over the next few years.
People are still having to do that now only they're paying 10 times the rental and having to work much longer harder hours, with housing increasing and increasing faster than their salary ever could. There seems little hope of improving your lot through sheer hard work, other than being left money from a relative.

@xmasfairy21 Oh and I'd you want a London career and kids, marry a man who works in IT or banking

"Marry a man who works in IT or banking" dear god is this 1982!! What awful advice.

I work in IT in London. I'm female, earn my own money, have a husband/kids and I'm not financially dependent on anyone in life. You don't need to marry a rich man!