To think that the Mumsnet obsession with nicknames is weird?

[521Jeanie]

So often you'll read a post saying something like
"What do you think of the name Atticus (nickname would be Kit)"
or
"I'm going to call my daughter Marigold with the nickname of Mary"

If you want to call your child Kit or Mary, why don't you just call them Kit or Mary?

These are two examples from the last couple of days but you see it very often. Quite often the nickname has nothing to do with the "real" name.

I deliberately chose names for DC that (I thought) couldn’t be shortened to nicknames….being from Ireland every mammy who loved her Patrick has ended up with a Pat, Paddy, Pa, Pad or Patsy according to their mates.

Who was I to know that Rory could actually be shortened

@JollyJoon

I think its telling that most of the ridiculous forced nicknames are for girls. It's like from birth they have been "sweetened".

I’m not convinced that’s true. The most recently thread (which inspired this thread) is about Atticus “Kit” for a baby boy. Nicknames are full names (Teddy or Lottie for example) are equally condemned as full names. I suppose the other way to look at is that babies are sweet and suit cutesy little nicknames that people in their mid fifties generally don’t and maybe it’s more respectful to find a name that Bunny and Wolfie can be shortened for (even if Barbara and William are stretches).

I quite like it, means the child can adapt their name over time. As mentioned up thread, I get more annoyed by people using shortened/nicknames for full names such as Archie, Alfie and Harry etc.

@Wannakisstheteacher

Yes!!! Recently neighbours of ours had a baby, named her Penelope, to be known as Poppy. What’s the point. Pure snobbery.

I know a Penelope known as Poppy. I think it's an accepted shortening rather than Penny.

@Whosthebestbabainalltheworld

I deliberately chose names for DC that (I thought) couldn’t be shortened to nicknames….being from Ireland every mammy who loved her Patrick has ended up with a Pat, Paddy, Pa, Pad or Patsy according to their mates.

Who was I to know that Rory could actually be shortened

I know an Irish Pat and Patsy married to each other!

@ftw163532

I agree op. I find it pretentious.

That's just it! My relative did a birth announcement on facebook welcoming Isabella. The very next day she updated her status to say please refer to her as Bella from now on. She made visitors use hand gel before going near the baby and covid was a year off! She wasn't even a PFB, her other children just happened to be born before it was a thing

I think it’s because mumsnetters anticipate child having a professional career and don’t image child can be a high court judge/surgeon etc called Pip or Daisy.
I think if you are going to do it you have to be understanding that people will get diminutive name wrong and not be cross if coat peg, brownies register etc is Margaret (official name) not Daisy.

I chose the two diminutives though, purely to stop the use of others I don’t like

That doesn’t stop their friends though, does it?

We also have a Matilda. We call her Matilda, or randomly, Emmy, which came from a younger sibling. I’m less keen on Tilly - all her friends and now a lot of her teachers call her Tilly.

I don’t see how it’s weird. Maybe not everyone does it but that doesn’t make it weird.

Yes, I find it weird.
I'm Irish, so I thought it must be a UK thing to shorten your name/ have a nickname.
I don't think it's as common in Ireland.

Ultimately, it is friends, classmates and colleagues who decide a person's nickname. You might want to choose 'Penelope, nn Poppy' but others will call her Penny, Pen, Pitstop, a surname-based one like Smiffy, Macca, Johnno, something based on a talent she has like Shooter or Sticks and so on.

I think it's weird to put a diminutive on the birth cert instead of a proper name.
Makes parents look uneducated.

@RobertaFirmino

Ultimately, it is friends, classmates and colleagues who decide a person's nickname. You might want to choose 'Penelope, nn Poppy' but others will call her Penny, Pen, Pitstop, a surname-based one like Smiffy, Macca, Johnno, something based on a talent she has like Shooter or Sticks and so on.

Yep, if you walk in to school on the first day and insist on being called by a nickname, you aren't going to be very popular!

I don’t think it’s weird either. One of my kids has a long pretty name that I’ve shortened from day one. My DH calls her by her proper name, her siblings use another abbreviation and her friends call her yet another nickname. I don’t think it matters 🤷🏻‍♀️

If you are going to call your child Jack though I personally think it’s odd to put John on birth certificate. Surely just leads to confusion.

@user1471604848

Yes, I find it weird. I'm Irish, so I thought it must be a UK thing to shorten your name/ have a nickname. I don't think it's as common in Ireland.

As PP said, you know all Patricks? No Paddy, Pat, Patsy people? Because that's not been my experience. And Sinead = Nadie. And my aunt uses a completely different name. Think Mary = Noreen.

But it used to be perfectly ordinary to do that years ago.
I’m pushing 50 and my full name is the shortened version of a traditional name, like Vicky for Victoria. It was so unusual when I was a child to have Vicky as my full name that people would insist that it wasn’t and that my name really was Victoria and I was mistaken.

Now it is perfectly common for a child to be called Ricky, Archie etc.

I have a weird thing about shortenings of names not being used as actual names. I’m aware it’s completely unreasonable of me, and irrational. I also have some exceptions - for example, I don’t mind Kate.

YABU - having a nickname as a given name is a pet hate of mine! DH's friend has been known as Ted for his whole life, but he goes by his given name of Edward professionally as it sounds more grown up.

When I'm considering baby names, I always imagine how they would look on a wedding invitation to see if they are "grown up" enough!

I really like that my name is Rebecca and that people know me as Becca. It was really, really run of the mill back in the 70s and 80s to use diminutives so I am entirely confused by your assertion that it's an "MN thing".

@RobertaFirmino

Ultimately, it is friends, classmates and colleagues who decide a person's nickname. You might want to choose 'Penelope, nn Poppy' but others will call her Penny, Pen, Pitstop, a surname-based one like Smiffy, Macca, Johnno, something based on a talent she has like Shooter or Sticks and so on.

Have you ever filled in a school application form? Every time I have there's a box that says "known as" and that's what the teachers call out.

Classmates and colleagues have no knowledge of the given name, IME..

I'm just leaving Hugo here because it still makes me laugh

I kind of think that nicknames evolve rather than being set. My two DC's nicknames I could never have predicted before they were born. And my DD has a nickname at uni that she never had growing up or with her friends at school.

I personally struggled with the idea of giving a child of mine a full name I didn't like, because I really wanted to call them a shorter version. But that's just me and I'd not judge anyone for doing so.

@DontPeeInThePlayHouse

I'm just leaving Hugo here because it still makes me laugh

How had I never seen that before??? Arthursixpence made me laugh till I had a coughing fit

I think it's just annoying that people say nicknames instead of shortenings. And the back-engineering à la Hugo. But in reality, many people are called something different to what's on their birth certificate.

I think it’s a bit contrived. I used to surf the website ‘nameberry’ when I was naming my kids for inspiration and I remember being astounded at the bizarrely contrived ways people would try to make a name more unusual. So they would like a nice name but obviously saw it as too ‘common’ and would try to make it into a more unusual name.

You would see threads like ‘what do you think of Penelope. Nickname would be Poppy.’ And I’d be astounded thinking ‘well they’re two different names.’ I’ve seen loads like it. My personal favourite was one thread suggesting Caroline with the nickname Cricket. What on Earth?