To think that the Mumsnet obsession with nicknames is weird?

[521Jeanie]

So often you'll read a post saying something like
"What do you think of the name Atticus (nickname would be Kit)"
or
"I'm going to call my daughter Marigold with the nickname of Mary"

If you want to call your child Kit or Mary, why don't you just call them Kit or Mary?

These are two examples from the last couple of days but you see it very often. Quite often the nickname has nothing to do with the "real" name.

@MrsTerryPratchett my dads Scottish and his family have some bonkers diminutives too - Auntie Myra was actually called Margaret and Uncle Jed was called Joseph - but there’s a massive thing for it in posh circles - Binky Felstead for example. Cutesy nicknames but a ‘sensible’ name because they’re rich where people who will always succeed

Can you imagine going through life being called Clemmy!?

I really dislike the ones where the poster has a shortlist of preferred names but can’t decide. Random posters then give a huge list of totally unconnected names instead which is not what the poster asked for.

This is the first time one of my childrens’ names (diminutive, that is. The full name is bog standard) has been called pretentious on MN! Legendary times, I claim my free goat and biscuit now. :o

All three of mine have nicknames, two bestowed by the youngest as a toddler, which is something of a tradition in many families it would seem, and the other just happened. I chose the two diminutives though, purely to stop the use of others I don’t like. What can I say, pregnancy and birth hormones are a twat, and nobody was prepared to go toe-to-toe with me.

No problem with nicknames but you don't pick them along with the actual name.

A name should never be chosen with a nickname in mind, nicknames just happen organically. I find it a bit nouveau riche to predetermine a nickname before they've even met the child.

Auntie Myra was actually called Margaret and Uncle Jed was called Joseph

Yes! There are some equally weird ones in mine!

@MrsTerryPratchett my dad was just called a totally different name until he was about 10 🤣 think Andrew to Arthur . Random. Also the middle names…. Wow!

It’s a pain in arse when you chose a name and everyone decides to actually shorten it to whatever they like ‘because that’s what has been done for centuries’….

If I had wanted to call my child Kit or whatever, that’s what I would have done…

(Basically @521Jeanie, it unfortunately works both ways ….)

Yeah I don’t get it sometimes, fair enough the names that are obviously shorter versions (eg we like Chris for a boy but officially he will be Christopher) but sometimes there are threads along the lines up ‘We really love Lucy but want something longer on the birth certificate, hate Louise so won’t use that. Is Elizabeth on birth certificate nn Lucy ok?’

Always makes me laugh when you get the random ones that don’t go at all ‘We like Penelope on BC with the NN Lottie’

Just use the name you like on the birth certificate! Lucy is perfectly fine on its own.

I thought it was just so they have covered that basis when naming the child. So they know it's not a completely stupid name.

Of course you have to have a formal name and a diminutive. Those of you who find it weird, what do you call up the stairs when you’re absolutely furious with them?

‘

Some one on baby names board has actually suggested calling baby Leo ‘Leonidas’ . Just call the baby Leo. No one will care he doesn’t have a ‘special’ name !

Always makes me laugh when you get the random ones that don’t go at all ‘We like Penelope on BC with the NN Lottie’

But Lottie might be cute on a two yo but not a 20 yo. You can't lengthen to Penelope so giving a longer name means the kid has options.

This thread reminds me why I gave all my kids names that couldn't be shortened. One name, job done.

I don't think it is strange at all to think about nicknames in the future when naming your child. It's quite normal surely?

always find the concept of Henry\ Harry thing weird. It's the same number of letters. I do say this as a mum of a child of that name.

Loads are like that in terms of same number of syllables.
Charlotte/Lottie
Alfred/Alfie/Freddie

And the weirdest: Jamie for James.

I have the problem that using the diminuitive is so ingrained that few will call DS by his full name.
I called him "Alexander" because I like the full name and I know it was inevitable that he would pick up Alex at some point, but was mildly irritated that a TA in Reception unilaterally renames children and then it sticks through school life. (Other friends have had this issue and the children are too young to feel confident to correct their names) The staff should be using the proper name in official corespondence. The awkward bit is that Alex BOGOF is actually a different family member of a different name so I'm always slightly bewildered why staff talk about her

So at home Alexander is always Alexander or the naturally evolved nicknames that developed after he was born, and I hadn't planned on calling him things like "Xandie" in advance.

He'll probably end up being called something like BOGGY or OFFAL by his mates by the time he's a teenager

YABU not have posted this on Baby Names.

I think these threads come about because nicknames and diminutives are separated. I think it’s sensible to consider diminutives when naming children. If you hate Mike, I’d give Michael a swerve as more likely than not he’ll be Mike by the time he’s 25. Similarly if you like a long name with lots of choice for shortenings it makes sense to consider them and wonder if you’d rather call you child Lizzy or Beth or Eliza day to day. Obviously it might not stick and your child will grow up to have an opinion on their name and what they want to be called, but as a baby they don’t do you might as well pick one you like best.

These diminutives are often called nicknames, which always attracts the attention of the ‘nicknames have to grow organically’ crowd. If you define a nickname as something which is affectionate and based on a mispronunciation or characteristic or quirk then of course a nickname can’t be decided before birth (unless you stick with Kicker). But if you use nickname interchangeably with diminutive then I think you can.

Some posts are real stretches and do have me rolling my eyes, but personally I prefer Scarlett and we’re calling her Lottie (which I have seen) to just Lottie, even though I think the derivation doesn’t really work. I’m really not a fan of the nickname as a full name trend though which probably biases that. Even though the nickname is a bit ridiculous, I don’t think it’s harmful and the child can always revert to the full name if they want to.

@PGordino

Of course you have to have a formal name and a diminutive. Those of you who find it weird, what do you call up the stairs when you’re absolutely furious with them?

‘

ALEXANDER PTOLOMY BOGOF!!!

But "Oi Al!" also works

T'other DS has enough names that I don't need to bellow the surname too.

Hijacking the parental controls app or taking the TV over with appropriately themed youtube videos also works... they know what to do when the dishwasher reviews 2021 video comes onto the TV...

I think its telling that most of the ridiculous forced nicknames are for girls. It's like from birth they have been "sweetened".

I think it's totally normal to think about diminutives. I was known by a diminutive through my early childhood, then a different ones in late primary school/early secondary and then by about 15 I started going by the full version of my name (think Lizzie -> Liz -> Elizabeth). I had other nicknames that evolved organically but was very glad to have my full name as a young adult. I would've hated to be 'Lizzie' on my birth certificate, but it was a good shortening of my name as child and my parents always intended to use it during my infancy. My mother still uses it sometimes.

If I had a daughter that I wanted to call Kitty for example, I would definitely use Catherine or Katherine on the birth certificate. I don't think that's bonkers. I can call her Kitty, she can get her friends or future colleagues to use another shortening or her full name if she prefers.

Where the shortening is a proper name (e.g. your Marigold to Mary example) I might be more hesitant, but I would definitely put Christopher or the birth certificate and not Kit. It's the normal thing to do, isn't it? I don't really know any adults who don't have 'proper' names so I am surprised as posters claiming this is a whole new thing. Everyone I know called Jim or Annie or Issie is actually James, Anne, Isabel etc and uses their full name on occasion.

@JollyJoon

I think its telling that most of the ridiculous forced nicknames are for girls. It's like from birth they have been "sweetened".

You're so right!

@PGordino

Of course you have to have a formal name and a diminutive. Those of you who find it weird, what do you call up the stairs when you’re absolutely furious with them?

‘

Their normal name???

Never seen the point of having a diminutive tbh. If I had wanted to call them that, that’s the name I would have chosen.
Why on Earth would you go through the pain of choosing a name knowing full well you will never use it and just use their diminutive instead?

Our daughters name has a short and a long form. We preferred the short form but it doesn’t sit well with our surname, so we gave her the long form officially for that reason and then call her the short form*

*actually not entirely true as both our kids get called a variety of nicknames that have evolved that aren’t their real name at all.