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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want to take this child to school?

94 replies

weend · 07/11/2021 11:11

My friend has an 8 year old son and so do I, she works early shifts of a Monday so I always take her son to school as her partner has to go to work. I don't have an issue with this.

She texted me last night saying her partner has tested positive for covid and it's likely her eldest also has it as he has most of the symptoms, but her youngest is fine and can go to school.

AIBU to not want to take him? WWYD?

OP posts:
AlexaShutUp · 07/11/2021 11:52

@weend

I'd be taking him in the car which is why I'm not sure I want to take him. He has had negative LFTs but I'm just worried in case he is positive later on and will have passed it onto me and DS.
If you're not comfortable with it, I think it's perfectly reasonable to say that you'd rather not take the risk. It's your call.
GrandmasCat · 07/11/2021 11:53

It is a no from me, I find it terribly cheeky she has not released you from taking him this week herself..

TMChappyascanbe · 07/11/2021 11:54

@WTF475878237NC

I'd say no we don't want close contact in case he contracts covid.
Yeah this is what I would do.
Theforest · 07/11/2021 11:54

@SparklyLeprechaun

I helped under similar circumstances with one of dd's friends. My reasoning was that dd and the other girl spend all day together in a classroom anyway, so a walk to school won't make any difference. But it's up to you. (As it happens, the other girl did end up with Covid, but neither dd nor I caught it)
I agree with this. The unavoidable risk is already there.

If they are doing LFT tests every morning I think I would do it.

whynotwhatknot · 07/11/2021 11:56

But theyre going to be in the same class together arent they

BackBackBack · 07/11/2021 12:02

The problem is that your son is going to be with this child in class anyway, so the risk is no greater really.

If the child's had negative LFTs, then I'd take him but open car windows and wear a mask.

BluebellsGreenbells · 07/11/2021 12:03

Kids are in school with positive parents and siblings and reading these threads they aren’t isolating - which with little kids is impossible. They aren’t even aware if the child has had a test.

School staff are aware and have no protection, yet you won’t have a LFT negative child in the car?

Think what help you would need if you or the kids test positive?

Werehamster · 07/11/2021 12:07

If you do take him, then wind all the car windows down and have everyone wear masks. No talking in the car. It will reduce your risk massively.

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 07/11/2021 12:12

But the kid will be in class with your child anyway no?

Onatree · 07/11/2021 12:13

Sorry do I get it right that the kid will be in a class anyway? In which case what is the issue?

AnCailleachOiche · 07/11/2021 12:18

I would send a polite 'no thank you'

SinoohXaenaHide · 07/11/2021 12:22

I don't think it's relevant that the child will be in class anyway. Its a class of 30 and unless yoir child and this child are best buddies/on the same table they might not be in particularly close contact in the classroom. In the car the contact is a lot closer and there's contact with you too rather than just your DC so much higher risk.

CherryBlossomAutumn · 07/11/2021 12:25

I think it’s bad she wants to potentially infect a whole class with Covid - many children are asymptomatic.

honkytonkheroe · 07/11/2021 12:26

I had a similar situation with a lift share during holidays to a holiday club. The mum tested positive and we had planned to lift share (me take and her bring back) but she immediately made different arrangements for her husband to take (he'd already had it) and said he'd bring back if I wanted. We didn't lift share at all and by the second day he had tested positive too. If not take her and don't think your friend should put you in that position.

EmmaGrundyForPM · 07/11/2021 12:27

OP why not walk the children to school, that would massively reduce the risk.

Mummyoflittledragon · 07/11/2021 12:31

@CherryBlossomAutumn

I think it’s bad she wants to potentially infect a whole class with Covid - many children are asymptomatic.
What are you talking about? The mum following the rules. Don’t berate the individual. Complain about the rules.
Orangebonbon · 07/11/2021 12:32

@weend

I'd be taking him in the car which is why I'm not sure I want to take him. He has had negative LFTs but I'm just worried in case he is positive later on and will have passed it onto me and DS.
Are they in the same class? If so he may pass it on anyway.
ShepherdMoons · 07/11/2021 12:37

I wouldn't do it, if I was walking I would but not in the car.

I've known so many people to have several negative lateral flows but all the symptoms. The PCR then came back positive. It's really not worth the risk.

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 07/11/2021 12:38

@CherryBlossomAutumn

I think it’s bad she wants to potentially infect a whole class with Covid - many children are asymptomatic.
Young kids don’t need to isolate, by all means ruin another year of your child’s education but leave mine alone.
SunndyD · 07/11/2021 12:40

I would do, it’s the inevitable that we will all get it at some point. What if your family get into that position would you want people to help out? If you’re double jabbed then I’d go for it. One of DSs best friends parents both have it, we’ve taken him to school , swimming etc. As I know they’d do the same for me

me4real · 07/11/2021 12:42

I helped under similar circumstances with one of dd's friends. My reasoning was that dd and the other girl spend all day together in a classroom anyway, so a walk to school won't make any difference.

@SparklyLeprechaun OP will have them in a car so the risk isn't the same as walking at all.

@weend If you don't feel comfortable doing it then say no and they should accept that. x

TheYearOfSmallThings · 07/11/2021 12:42

YANBU, although I have taken the child to school in this circumstance. I had mixed feelings, but... we've been around Covid for almost 2 years now so I just thought fuck it. Not saying that's right of course.

Smurf123 · 07/11/2021 12:57

I'd be saying no. Our school has also said they will not take children who has a household member who has tested positive for the full 10 day isolation period as it was spreading through school like wildfire as a result and a majority of cases where a family member was positive within 10 days others in the family had also tested positive later

Notaroadrunner · 07/11/2021 12:57

@EmmaGrundyForPM

OP why not walk the children to school, that would massively reduce the risk.
The school could be miles away.

@weend I wouldn't take him. Just say you are not comfortable being in close contact with him.

vixeyann · 07/11/2021 13:02

I wouldn't no. To be honest the LFTs aren't a great indicator either. My mum currently has covid. She did 4 LFTs all negative but tested positive on the PCR test. I don't think anyone could be put out by you not wanting to do this.