5 year old vegetarian?

[Meatandseventeenveg]

DD (aged 5 and a bit) is a good eater generally but has started to figure out where meat and fish come from and is refusing it.

She'll still eat (for now) ham, sausages, nuggets, mince and burgers but she doesn't seem to recognise that it is meat. I feel kind of guilty not spelling it out for her, but at the same time I'd prefer her to keep eating meat where she can.

So kind of a double AIBU really. First, AIBU to let her refuse meat and fish? And second, AIBU to not tell her that she is eating meat when I know she doesn't like it?

Around that age I did similar, starting with meats where the name is also the animal. My parents didn't point out that things like bacon were meat. I eventually realised and refused these things, was completely veggie by 7/8.

I was not annoyed that my parents didn't tell me that beef was cow, bacon was meat etc. Importantly they didn't lie, they answered only when I asked. I think the was the right thing to do and would do similar for my DC.

I think there was probably a middle ground where obvious meats creeped me out, but none obvious meats didn't bother me. Rather the same way that some adults would eat fish, but not a whole fish with the head attached, if you see what I mean. Probably your DD is in that zone and may go either way (back to omnivore, go completely veggie) or continue eating meat but being squeamish about its origins. You don't need to push her either way.

I did eventually become a strict veggie and still am over 30 years later.

Tell her the truth!there's no option.
She can have a very healthy plant based diet and lifestyle.

I might ask her if she wants to know or not, for stuff that isn't obvious... Is that a terrible idea?

And thanks for the recipe ideas!

I think that’s a great idea. I’d have a sensible chat and say that you know she’s thinking about whether eating animals feels ok for her so you wonder if she wants you to tell her which meals have animals in, as you can’t always tell. And I would celebrate her compassion and tell her I was proud of her thinking about how animals feel!!

Our dd has been veggie since 5. The school had chickens and she felt had about eating them! Nothing wrong with it we let her get in with it.

get on with it

You do realise that many cultures are completely vegetarian and their children grow up perfectly healthy? It's also so important to respect your children's views and choices and not gaslight them just because they're young and "you know better". She's still learning and might even grow out of it - or it might be a life long thing, either way there will be no harm done for being a vegetarian. Your obligation is to provide as wide a variety of veggie dishes as possible so that she grows up with a varied diet.

I’ve never eaten meat (or dairy) and I was a professional sportsman for ten years, I’m now semi pro. It really isn’t hard to get what you need from a meat or dairy free diet. Cheaper too in the long run, meat and fish are expensive.

In other words she has NOT AT ALL figured out what is meat let alone "where it comes from", nor does she have a clue why she needs protein for optimum development. Unsurprising at 5.

You're the adult, step up.

My youngest was a vegetarian for a while after he figured out where meat came from. He's since decided that it's too much hassle to be vegetarian but I made sure everyone respected his decision at the time.
You should tell your child about the foods she doesn't realise are meat so she can make a decision from there about them. The meat free alternatives are not expensive

I'm vegetarian. DH is not. DS clocked where meat came from about the same age as your DD. He decided he did not want to eat lamb any more and we respected that decision. DS asked me why I don't eat meat and I had to answer truthfully. He does however still eat chicken, fish and bacon occasionally although we all now eat quorn sausages! Be guided by your daughter OP. I've just bought the 'Green Roasting Tin' book - it's very good and I've also found a lot of good recipes online.

Buy a copy of Herb the Vegetarian Dragon (a story) and Cooking with Herb (companion recipe book). Perfect for that age. My DC have never eaten any meat or fish and are very healthy adults.

Just tell her the truth so she can decide for herself.

My DD turned veggie at 6 when she figured out where meat came from (not that we ever hid it!). Nearly 3 years on and she is still going strong. She will very occasionally eat sustainably caught etc fish but never meat. The rest of us aren't veggie but eat very little meat (except DD2 who is a meat fiend!). We respect DDs wishes, as do her school, and her friends and family. We would also respect her wishes if she changes her mind.

Trouble is the meat she's left eating is the worst kind though, processed, which is why she doesn't recognise it as meat I guess. My kids don't eat much meat, and the they like the opposite meats to each other so even less. We eat a few veggie or vegan meals a week in any case. I don't think it's a big deal as long as they're getting a mixed diet. So I'd probably offer a choice each meal or once a week as a part of meal planning, for example Dd on Monday we're having sausages, do you want meat sausages or veggie? Then you're explaining but not in a too in your face way.

Of course you should let her be vegetarian and tell her what is and isn't meat. Being veggie is generally healthier and better for the environment. I've been veggie (laterally vegan) since I was 8, am 5'10", very healthy and competed at a very high level in a very physically demanding sport for years when I was younger.

Good for her for having a conscience at such a young age.

honestly i think as a parent you make the choices- obviously cant force her to eat anything - but if you want her to keep eating meat, and she doesnt object to these items, it works for your family, keep going.