AIBU to be so traumatised by seeing someone else's accident?

[Gigglebiscuit]

I witnessed an accident happen this morning, child Vs vehicle. It was just awful. I saw it all happen, from circumstances leading up to it, to it happening in front of me, to the aftermath. Thankfully a doctor saw it from a distance too, so was quickly on scene. But required ambulance and air ambulance. While waiting for the ambulance, listening to the child cry and scream. Which was a good sign that they were making noise, but very upsetting. Child obviously taken to hospital, but what first seemed likely to be fatal looks likely to be thankfully fully recoverable in time. It was a true accident, nobody's fault, just one of those things.

It's not my child, I've never met them before. And it didn't happen to me. I just witnessed and did what I could to help. But I feel properly traumatised by it. I just keep seeing / hearing it over and over again. AIBU?

Yanbu, not at all, it must have been awful and really distressing to witness.

Totally normal and highly likely that you'll suffer from PTSD, right now you'll be in shock I'd imagine.

Please speak to a professional about the incident, the police or NHS should be able to refer you based on this incident.

Sorry you had to witness this, hopefully the child recovers and that helps with the trauma.

Oh gosh OP, I think anyone would feel traumatised over seeing that. You’re probably in a bit of shock, take it easy.

Of course you're not being unreasonable. You've witnessed something shocking and traumatic and you'd have to be inhuman not to be affected by it. Not sure what to suggest but be kind to yourself. I'm sure the child's family will be very grateful for your help.

Oh how awful for all involved

Hope the child is ok

You are not being unreasonable and you should find some to talk to, a professional or a friend who is a good listener to help you process it.

@Bigtruth

Totally normal and highly likely that you'll suffer from PTSD, right now you'll be in shock I'd imagine.

Please speak to a professional about the incident, the police or NHS should be able to refer you based on this incident.

Sorry you had to witness this, hopefully the child recovers and that helps with the trauma.

It's certainly possible to experience PTSD, but not 'highly likely'. Studies show that only about 10% of people who experience a traumatic incident actually go on to experience full PTSD, which is a full diagnosable condition that lasts long term. It is highly likely that OP will not go on to develop PTSD, especially if she takes some steps now to look after herself.

OP is definitely likely to be in shock though as you say, in the immediate aftermath. Debriefing with a professional can be really helpful - talk through everything that happened and the outcomes and so on, and the next steps. Is it something that is likely to be investigated, either as a criminal prosecution or for insurance or compensation? If so, the police and possibly your insurance company should be able to offer you some some support there.

I’m sorry you had to see that OP. This might sound very strange but there was a scientific study about playing Tetris in the 24 hours after a traumatic incident can help your brain process it. I’ll try and finds the link now.

Cut yourself some slack - it was a horrible incident and it was only a matter of hours ago. It’s natural your brain will still be processing what happened.

An awful event to witness, of course you're shaken up.

After something that happened to me I did a search and it seems that flashbacks etc in the immediate aftermath are the brain's natural way of processing what's happened. It's only in the longer term that they're a sign of a wider problem. Go easy on yourself over the next while.

Here it is - seems to be 6 hours but I found it very interesting www.psych.ox.ac.uk/news/tetris-used-to-prevent-post-traumatic-stress-symptoms

It sounds awful and not at all unusual for you to be so traumatized. The going over it is normal, it will pass but that is a normal response. What a horrible thing to be near. Thank goodness the child was ok.

A few years ago my DP and a co- worker witnessed and then helped with a serious RTA outside where he worked , they were both like you straight afterwards , really unsettled and stressed , both were offered counselling and although he didn't take up the offer I think what helped him most was talking about it openly and freely with me and friends straight afterwards
Seek some help
Talk
See a councillor
I hope you feel better about it soon

Acute Stress Disorder lasts 3days to a month, not as serious as PTSD which is longer lived but has some similar symptoms. After witnessing a fatal RTC when a driver went head first into a HGV (driver had a stroke at the wheel) and being first on scene it took about a week for me to be able to sleep properly - it's recommended you have short day time naps as it helps your brain process the details of what happened and reduces the flashbacks. It took 3 weeks to stop jumping everytime I heard a bang as it reminded me of the impact.

You are definitely not being unreasonable at all. I would feel exactly the same and am not easily shaken. I've never witnessed anything like this but would imagine it is normal to feel shaken and upset for a few days or weeks. I'm so glad that the child is going to be ok.

As a 17 year old I was first on scene to a child vs. car accident, I witnessed it too. I am 58 now and can still clearly recall that day so I urge you to get some form of help if you feel you need it. I will keep everything crossed for the child, the one I saw wasn't so lucky.

Completely normal, anyone would be. In fact one of the foundational cases on delictual liability in the U.K. was to do with people who witnessed a horrible accident and experienced very severe shock.

Look after yourself. These things take time (and sometimes a bit of extra help in the form of counselling etc). I hope you feel better soon

I experienced something similar years ago. Didn't see the crash happen but heard it (we'd just walked past the junction where it happened). Child in lots of pain, waited for ambulance, gave details to police, etc. I felt quite spaced out for a few days, like I couldn't really focus on anything. Agree with the advice to sleep/nap when you can and go easy on yourself.

[quote Leftbutcameback]Here it is - seems to be 6 hours but I found it very interesting www.psych.ox.ac.uk/news/tetris-used-to-prevent-post-traumatic-stress-symptoms[/quote]
Was going to share this, too!

OP - totally normal to be traumatised, I saw a woman hit by a car once (she was fine, afterward, but it looked awful) and it took me weeks to stop thinking about it.

Be gentle with yourself, it's not a nice thing to witness. There's a reason professions where they see upsetting things and people dying regularly - doctors, military, etc - have the highest levels of PTSD.

Definitely try the Tetris thing - you can play online free here tetris.com/play-tetris or I'm sure there are apps :)

I have some expertise here OP. This is normal. Sleep disturbance and re-living the event and some other post trauma symptoms are normal.

If it goes on too long or starts interfering with your life then it’s time to seek help.

Take good care of yourself. Listen to your own instincts. If you feel it will help to talk do but forcing yourself to talk about what happened might make things worse. Trust your own body’s ability to heal. This is your brains way of trying to keep you safe in the future. I know that sounds trite but it is. Your brain is doing it’s job.

Look after yourself - eat and drink regularly, take time to recover. Try not to turn to alcohol or drugs to block it out.

This is odd but cutting edge: There is some research that shows that playing something like Tetris after a traumatic event can reduce the intrusive repetitive visual images - so you might want to dedicate a bit of time to a visual spatial computer game right now - it can’t hurt. I know it sounds weird but it’s true. At the least it will be a bit of a distraction.

So sorry you saw this OP. Sounds horrible.

Good that the child was ok. Try and imagine them as they are most likely now: most likely on a colourful children’s ward, with kind nurses and play specialists and being treated to their favourite foods etc.

Took me a while to type so can see that others have mentioned playing Tetris too. Fantastic this is available information now. That’s great.

I agree with other posters please seek some help with this. You are still in shock and when it eases you may need someone to lean on. X

How traumatic that’s awful OP. Hope the child makes a full recovery.
Could you contact the hospital and ask about the child (I don’t know if that would be allowed). What an awful thing to witness.

Thank you all for the comments.

The child in the accident will be in hospital for some time I would think. They were definitely injured. We have an area in common, and some people have already asked about the accident, having heard about it locally, and if anyone knows how the child is, so I guess at some point we'll probably hear an update. The paramedics were thinking that it probably wouldn't be life altering or threatening, despite vehicle going right over child, once they'd examined and administered pain meds. But obviously they'll have done more tests at hospital.

I've had a quiet afternoon, a seriously sweet hot cuppa, and feel a little better. Still a bit shocked. I've seen a few accidents over the years, even been in a couple, but this one just really threw me. I think especially as a mum myself, and thinking this could be one of my kids. I did play a bit of tetris after your comments, thought it couldn't hurt!

I do see a therapist already, so will send them a message and warn them that this has happened, and I will want to talk about it when I see them next week.