weird text from lady on facebook marketplace. Now I don't know if I was U?

[Sneezecakesmama]

I couldn't find my umbrella so decided on buying one off FB marketplace.
Found a nice Joules one for £15 and asked to buy it.
At 09.12 am had the conversation via messenger and agreed to buy. She said it would be on the doorstep and put the money through the letterbox. Fine by me.
I asked what time was convenient and she replied no later than 12.15 as she was going out and gave me the address. I said I would be there at 12.
At 11am I found my umbrella (DH had it) so messaged her at 11.12 am to apologise and say I didn't need it after all, but thank you very much.
She replied
Is this a joke I have changed my plans plus taken item off eBay!!!?
I am fuming reported and informed police as you have our address plus our plans!! Very odd

It was literally 2 hours so why take it off eBay? She hadn't changed her plans and why that level of aggression?

Was I really being as unreasonable as she says? Genuinely confused!

[Sofiegiraffe]

Would the police actually do anything proactive about her concerns? Probably not.

Definitely not. They'd probably say "it seems she was just wanting to purchase a brolly and has now changed her mind. But we shall be on the look out for a brolly-less criminal staking out the local area for empty houses........." then do this and leave, probably annoyed at their time being wasted.

[gingerbiscuits]

🤣 People buying & selling on FB Marketplace can be SO weird! I advertised some stuff a few months ago & was told to go f*ck myself by a charming person when I politely messaged him back in response to his query to tell him that an item had literally just been sold but that I'd come back to him 1st if the person didn't turn up to collect it!! Some people are just batshit crazy!

[PetriDisher]

anxiousoverthinker I assume you are sofiegiraffe? I'm referring to the civil law as opposed to criminal law, of which contract law is a part. And so were you.

My objection was to you stating things like, "No one is obliged to follow through on a purchase of any item unless they have signed a legally binding contract. FB messenger is not such a contract" (incorrect on several counts and nothing to do with criminal law), "it's not a binding contract to swap messages saying you want an item" (it could well be if all elements of a contract are present, and this is nothing to do with criminal law) etc.

Binding contracts and legal obligations often have absolutely nothing to do with criminal law but they are still obligations a court will enforce and that can cause people to be on the wrong side of a judgment / costs order if they take internet posts like that at face value. I had a longer response than this but I'm not trying to be a dick about it, just suggesting that you don't declare things like this that you think should be true as though they are concrete fact when they are not.

General plea: People of the internet - never rely anything you read on internet forums about the law (including from me!) - get independent legal advice from a reputable, regulated source!

[Sofiegiraffe]

Ok @PetriDisher you're clearly a superior person to me and I do hope you feel much better now.

🙄

[Sofiegiraffe]

I'm referring to the civil law as opposed to criminal law, of which contract law is a part. And so were you.

I was referring to criminal law. But I'm sure with how superior you are, you can tell me with certainty that I wasn't and you evidently know exactly what I was thinking when I typed.

[Lavendersquare]

@Sneezecakesmama I think you did the right thing in telling her you no longer needed the umbrella far worse to have just been a no show.

Some people who are selling stuff can be really tricky, I once ordered something from eBay that didn't arrive, the seller was really difficult and wouldn't send the tracking/proof of postage. When they eventually did it turned out they used my postcode with a random house number. I tracked down the parcel from the other end of the street but the seller was unapologetic and told me off for wasting her time because apparently any normal person would have checked with the whole street before bothering the seller.

[Sofiegiraffe]

I had a longer response than this but I'm not trying to be a dick about it,

This is so unbelievably patronising.

[PetriDisher]

Sofiegiraffe Oh come on, we're all wrong sometimes - it happens to me all the time, I can promise you!

Anyway, back to the OP.

[Sofiegiraffe]

just suggesting that you don't declare things like this that you think should be true as though they are concrete fact when they are not.

I didn't say anything was "concrete fact" ffs

[Sofiegiraffe]

@PetriDisher

Sofiegiraffe Oh come on, we're all wrong sometimes - it happens to me all the time, I can promise you!

Anyway, back to the OP.

Patronising. Again.

[Cheeserton]

Total overreaction, but you should have kept your word and honoured the deal.

[Sofiegiraffe]

@PetriDisher
It's not actually your knowledge I have an issue with, it's your apparent superiority complex and the way you "correct" me as though you're such a better person than I am. You're not. No matter how much you talk down to me.

[PetriDisher]

sofiegiraffe I'm sorry I've come across that way. I'm not correcting what you said because I think I'm a better person than you (being right or wrong about the law says absolutely nothing about someone as a person in my opinion), but because it was incorrect information on a public forum. That's it.

I don't suppose I can wish you well or a nice day without coming across as patronising, either, but to the extent I can, there it is!

[MintyGreenDream]

You were being a classic fb timewaster

[WalkingOnTheCracks]

[quote Sofiegiraffe]@PetriDisher
It's not actually your knowledge I have an issue with, it's your apparent superiority complex and the way you "correct" me as though you're such a better person than I am. You're not. No matter how much you talk down to me. [/quote]
@Sofiegiraffe

I think PetriDisher was reasonable, measured and avoided making it personal.

....how would you rather be told you're mistaken?

[yikesanotherbooboo]

Obviously the police won't be interested but you behaved dishonourably. You agreed to buy it . If you didn't need it you could have sold it on or given it away. The environmental point is disingenuous .

[gillsareforfish]

Ooops sorry wrong thread

[Scirocco]

Once you agreed to buy it, you really should have followed through. It wasn't a huge amount of money and it was for an item which would realistically have been useful so it wouldn't have been a waste for you. It's bad etiquette to withdraw from a purchase once it's been agreed.

The police thing is probably just to warn you away if you're a criminal - people use the same/similar approach as your actions could appear, in order to get an address and a clear window of opportunity to access a probably empty property. I don't think the police would actually be interested in you at all unless someone broke into the seller's house during the relevant timeframe.

[spudjulia]

[quote Sofiegiraffe]@PetriDisher
It's not actually your knowledge I have an issue with, it's your apparent superiority complex and the way you "correct" me as though you're such a better person than I am. You're not. No matter how much you talk down to me. [/quote]
Petridisher has been very polite considering your hesitance to accept that you were wrong and your personal attacks once you had nowhere left to go. Your initial response should have been along the lines of "hands up, I've no clue about contract law, it was just my best guess. Probably best to ask an expert". You would have come out of this looking much better.

[Sofiegiraffe]

@spudjulia

Firstly, I disagree that I made any "personal attacks" - I made a comment on what I felt a person's tone was towards me, and I'm entitled to that opinion.

Secondly, the issue has been resolved between that poster and I - your input is unnecessary.

Thirdly, I honestly, genuinely do not care how I "look coming out of this". It has about as much relevance to my life as what a random stranger on the bus that just went past by house thinks of me.

[Sofiegiraffe]

Apologies to the OP for the unnecessary derail.

[Andwander]

@shivbo2014.you would not last long on ebay.ebay is tough on timewasters and buyers who fuck up a sale because they change their mind

[spudjulia]

[quote Sofiegiraffe]@spudjulia

Firstly, I disagree that I made any "personal attacks" - I made a comment on what I felt a person's tone was towards me, and I'm entitled to that opinion.

Secondly, the issue has been resolved between that poster and I - your input is unnecessary.

Thirdly, I honestly, genuinely do not care how I "look coming out of this". It has about as much relevance to my life as what a random stranger on the bus that just went past by house thinks of me. [/quote]
You made personal comments about the poster that had nothing to do with the point of the thread. And while you are completely entitled to having an opinion on the nature and tone of another poster, and indeed entitled to behave however you like, readers are also entitled to form an opinion of you based on your behaviour. Quite ironic that you're telling me my 'input' is unnecessary, when you have made personal comments that derailed the thread. Strangely, I don't come to you for permission or acceptance about what and when I post. And my post was not really intended for your benefit; there's so much crap on MN that I try to point out when I believe posters have been reasonable and helpful, which I think @PetriDisher has been. If you wanted to take anything from my post, great. If you wanted to dig yourself even deeper, fine. No skin off my nose.