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Original poster

Would you ask neighbours to stop doing this? (parking, with amazing diagram)

195 replies

HopkinsLeftLeg · 20/10/2021 10:05

We live rurally. At the front of our house is a private lane, leading to small clusters of houses for around a mile along the road.

The school bus picks up kids at the B-road running along our house.

Diagram attached.

We've had issues with 1 neighbour parking on our land (yes, literally) and waiting for 10 mins until the bus picks their child up, turning on our grass, destroying it. Large boulders and sowing a load of replacement grass last summer put a stop to this, but we had a word with them, and asked them to park at the front of our house at drop off and pickup times, twice a day. It blocks our 2nd car parking space, and means i need to keep shutting the bedroom curtain to get dressed as they always arrive as i get changed for work Blush , but we were also trying to be reasonable - there isn't anywhere else for parents to park, so don't mind it for 15min in the morning and 15min in the afternoons. (that's car 1 in my picture)

However, this morning we've found that other parents in the area are using the private lane to park with their engines running, while they wait on school bus pickups. Car 2 and Car 3, right outside our living room window with their engines running, blocking our main driveway meaning we can't get the car out.

DH and I agree that this is annoying but there's nothing we can do - we don't own the private road at the front of the house.

But this feels odd - the parents in question aren't people we know, but we know they are the closest 2 houses (literally about 200 yards up the road) and i can see this might be an issue for years and years to come, 2x a day as their kids are still young. No idea why they've started doing it now, maybe because they've seen car 1 parking at our house?

Would you park as these cars have done?
Would you say anything if you were us, bearing in mind we don't own the road and have zero legal support - the private land owner of the lane is not one of the cars doing this.

Are we being unreasonable to think this is a bit crap of the neighbours?

(I'm originally from the city so no idea of the rural ettiquette involved here)

Would you ask neighbours to stop doing this? (parking, with amazing diagram)
OP posts:
sillysmiles · 20/10/2021 10:29

sorry car 2 and 3 are definitely parents from the houses along the road, i.e. sort of our "neighbours" in the area.

car 2 and 3 are definitely your neighbours if they only live 200m up the road.
I don't understand why they are driving to meet the bus when it's so close though.

Personally I think living in the country, you need to be on good terms with your neighbours, but you don't need to be a walk over.

Ask them not to turn on your grass and if they are over your driveway when you need to leave, just drive out and make them move.
If they are over your driveway for 10 minutes when you don't need to get out I'd personally let it go,

TroysMammy · 20/10/2021 10:29

Preventing you from leaving your drive and joining the highway is obstruction. Preventing you from accessing your driveway from a highway is not.

LookItsMeAgain · 20/10/2021 10:29

Can you get some signage indicating that no parking across driveway, access is required 24 x 7 perhaps. Then at least Car 3 would have to wait further back. You could get a sign for the other part of your driveway saying access to it is also required 24 x 7 so in effect cutting down the number of cars parking in front of your property to 1, the one that actually parks in front of your house and not the driveways.
They shouldn't be parking with their engines idling for another thing (not sure if they are) but you could approach them and ask them to turn off their engines while they are parked up.

Palladin · 20/10/2021 10:29

I would definitely say something, politely at first. Try to shame them into being more considerate. If that doesn't work, asking them to move their cars to let you out of your drive every time you can might make them feel it's too much hassle than it's worth.
Is idling the car engine permitted where you are? If not, report them. Speaking with your PCSO about blocking you in and idling might help, too.

Legitimatesalvage · 20/10/2021 10:30

They've sitting in the cars, yes?

For a few days, you need to go out when they park up, get in your car and drive out. Use your horn and they'll need to move. Go out onto the B-road, then around and come back. Do it for a few days in a row at drop off and pick up time and they'll get fed up.

dogsrock15 · 20/10/2021 10:30

They are very cheeky. I have a neighbour who them and their parents think it's ok to park over my driveway. I've actually come back from holiday on two occasions to find them parked on my driveway 😡 it's very awkward as we get on with them but who the hell does that? Lately it seems to be worse though. I wouldn't dream of parking in front of someone's driveway.

Doomscrolling · 20/10/2021 10:31

Start parking your cars there for a while, that will stop them

EmotionalSupportBear · 20/10/2021 10:33

i think a polite request asking them not to block your drive in is probably the best course of action to begin with!

NorthSouthcatlady · 20/10/2021 10:35

They are impressively lazy driving that far, l suppose it part explains the obesity issues in this country with adults and children. I vote you need to break this habit with a mixture of parking your cars in their spots, mixed in with on other days with magically wanting to get your car off the driveway whilst they’re parked there. Basically make it super inconvenient for them

Anoisagusaris · 20/10/2021 10:35

Sitting with the engine running would drive me batty!

I couldn’t get too fussed though about someone blocking my drive if they were sitting in their car and moved off when I needed to get out.

Cattitudes · 20/10/2021 10:37

Could you ask them to maybe car share, or take it in turns. Explain that there isn't room for all three of them there. Also they need to turn their engines off. Obviously the ideal would be if their dc walked but that might not be possible for any number of reasons.

EmmaGrundyForPM · 20/10/2021 10:38

If they are sitting in their car waiting for the bus then presumably they were still in the car when you wanted to leave. So did they still refuse to move?

1/3 mile is about 6 minutes walk, so no big deal unless it's chucking it down. They are being unreasonable

Stompythedinosaur · 20/10/2021 10:42

If they are sitting in their cars and are willing and able to move if you need to get in and out I think that is a very different thing to parking there.

I do thing there is more of an expectation to accommodate each other in small rural communities.

Driving over your grass is clearly unreasonable - a planted tree or well placed boulder would prevent this.

Foolsrule · 20/10/2021 10:43

Who owns the lane? Are you liable for the upkeep? If so, it’s going to be more expensive than it would have been with all this extra activity.

Original poster
HopkinsLeftLeg · 20/10/2021 10:46

They did move this morning, yes - car 3 moved left up the lane, but i then couldn't turn right to get OUT onto the B right (because car 1 and 2 didn't leave me enough turning room to turn right). so i ended up having to hang around waiting for them to get the kids out the car, get onto the bus, then drive back up the lane themselves.

fine if it's a 1 min delay, but in the winter it could be 10+ minutes.

i'm starting to think i shouldn't have intefered and just let 1 car keep using our grass - at least that way i wouldn't be blocked in!

to be clear, they haven't left their cars, drivers stayed in them at all times, with the kids.

i think it sounds like I'm not being unreasonable here but i may need to make it less convenient for them: parking at the front of our drive so there's no space for car 3, needing to get out so it's made inconveneint for them (this was genuine this morning), etc.

OP posts:
Brainwave89 · 20/10/2021 10:53

No one should be parking in a way that impinges your access. We live close to a school, and we have a constant problem of parents parking obstructing drives in the morning and afternoon. The school has a designated car park, and then a 100m walk. Some parents simply cannot be bothered. One even parked in the front of our drive and when challenges on return said I was only ten minutes and in any instance I need to drop off my kids so this takes precedence over your need to get out! So annoying!

Leftbutcameback · 20/10/2021 10:54

How old are the children though, and why aren't they just walking to wait for the bus? Do they drive every single day?

sillysmiles · 20/10/2021 10:54

All the making it more inconvenient for them thing sounds like a lot of effort.
Just get into your car when you are ready to leave, drive down the driveway, get them to move if they are in your way, go about your business.

Ask them there names too - so you can wind down the window and shout, "can john move his car too, I've no enough space to turn!"

Original poster
HopkinsLeftLeg · 20/10/2021 10:55

the children are around 11-12 (first year of high school)

OP posts:
Aroundtheworldin80moves · 20/10/2021 10:56

Why do secondary school kids need escorting to the bus stop?

maofteens · 20/10/2021 10:56

So did you tap on their window and say please move your car I need to get out? Surely they would then move their car and hopefully be mindful of parking there in the future? Mind you, I did once witness a mum park across a drive, the owner come out and say please can you move I have to go collect my kids (from another school) and the guilty woman say breezily 'oh hang on I'll just be a few minutes' 😮

TheUndeadLovelinessOfDemons · 20/10/2021 10:57

That is an amazing diagram! Grin

Leftbutcameback · 20/10/2021 10:57

That's a suprise - when you said they were young OP I assumed primary school age. They should be walking, unless physical issues prevent that

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 20/10/2021 11:00

so i ended up having to hang around waiting for them to get the kids out the car, get onto the bus, then drive back up the lane themselves

I don't understand why you can't tap on their windows and politely explain that they are blocking you in and ask them to move.

cricketmum84 · 20/10/2021 11:00

Get in the car. Drive up to the car blocking and use your horn until the selfish buggers move.

Also top top marks for that diagram ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️