Hi, 1st time posting so hope I can put issue across clearly. Found out due to MIL hinting that she was skint that SIL (her daughter) has been 'borrowing' lots of money. Each month MILs outgoings is higher than her income but as the income includes the savings we has to intervene as savings (over 2k) are now gone. I say we, I as DIL did most of the talking as hubby doesn't like confrontation. Highlighted to both of them that MIL can no longer afford to lend £. SIL is on benefits as she has MS so said we would help SIL if she was struggling. SIL says she's on the breadline, they have no money and show us she has £3.80 in her account. MIL says they help each other out, SIL does pay for MILs shopping sometimes & has paid back a bit but it is a small fraction of what has gone. SIL shares her statements & these tell a different story. She is only struggling to fund a severe spending habit. 4 different TV subscriptions, £26 pm on lottery, £25 dog treat subscription, takeaways. Food shopping in Sainsburys not Aldi & certainly not the food bank! I should add that she has a fiance who contributes over half his wages, she has more than enough to cover all normal outgoings & some left over. MIL only made excuses, saying she herself needs to cut back, she is spending next to nothing herself, she likes to pay for her daughters & grand daughters weekly horse riding (I know!) and has enough herself (pensions & benefits) to do that but can continue to the extent it has been. I think she overcompensates because SIL has health issues, DH is going to take over online banking and change password, MIL says "oh but SIL will get upset". We helped SIL save some £ by cancelling some unnecessary bills but there is still work to do. Until SIL can face the real issue (overspending possibly addiction) it isn't going to be resolved fully. MIL has told us to back off for a bit, as SIL is getting headaches. We are waiting for the bank password. I think she'll get worse when we lock her out. I don't think fiance knows everything, he gets a lot of blame from SIL and MIL, he doesn't do a lot around home, he works 12 hour shifts and as said he contributes. MiL never mentions the positives about him, always negative whereas SIL can do no wrong. Have told DH he needs to be firm, not "sorry we upset". I struggle as I always try to be reasonable and with her health it is a worry but there's a part of me that feels she is manipulative & not used to hearing no. I've said I will help DH with laying out all the figures for info and he needs to step up. Don't think either SIL or MIL 'get it' yet. Sorry for long post, think it therapeutic to get it all out, trying not to feel conflicted, like I'm being firm but fair without feeling like a b!tch!