Aibu to refuse dd fruit?

[Paperyfish]

Dd (9) adores fruit. She doesn’t have much of an appetite for savoury stuff though. Today she had a cereal bar after school before art club then risotto at 5.30. I believe it to be a reasonable size portion - her 7 yo brother ate the lot. As usual she scraped about a third of it in the bin claiming not to be hungry.I said if she bins her dinner there won’t be any late night snacks as I’m sick of wasting food. I let her have the planned dessert (melon)as I always planned to serve it and I don’t want to make dessert in to a reward. Anyway, now she is after an apple, more melon, some raisins…and I’ve said no. Aibu? I have offered some of the left over risotto or some shredded wheat or a plain yogurt ( as I worried she was honestly hungry)which have been turned down. She just wants fruit. I know fruit is healthy and all… but she needs balance and wastes other foods. I feel mean denying her fruit though.

Ours get toast no jam!! Or tea plate is left to reheat.. Fruit won't fill her up and she will be back in half an hour still hungry..

I'd let her have a banana.or something. If she can't eat all the dinner, maybe it's too much? Does she like it?

Little children have smallish stomachs and need to eat little and often. Could you keep some risotto back and then when she's hungry later, reheat it?

She might be a sweet tooth kind of child so it’s good she’s after fruit rather than a less healthy sugar source.

Or she might be a child who wants different flavours in a meal.

Risotto is delicious but I’d be bored with my entire evening meal being one thing. Every spoonful would be the same.

Then again, I might be quite odd. Either way, you have every right to refuse, for all the reasons you stated.

I think as long as you are offering something then she will not go hungry. Especially before bed fruit is not ideal for teeth

(you r lucky your children eat risotto! It's quit e a grown up food! I love it, but do find it incredibly filling )

Desert isn’t a reward here. But if you’re not hungry enough to eat dinner you don’t need any more food.
She needs a balanced diet. Fruit can be a snack or a pudding. But not instead of dinner.

She’s had plenty of options, no to more fruit.

@ColdToesMustBeOctober

(you r lucky your children eat risotto! It's quit e a grown up food! I love it, but do find it incredibly filling )

It’s soft mushy rice, it’s like baby food! I’m a big fan but it’s not very sophisticated.

To be honest, if she had a cereal bar after school, 5.30 is pretty early for tea. I would consider pushing dinner later and then enforcing no snacks

@ColdToesMustBeOctober she does like risotto as a rule, but not as much as fruit

@ColdToesMustBeOctober also I did offer the left overs* ( from the pan, not what she’d put in bin- obs)

• aka my lunch tomorrow

Risotto a grown up food?
Hardly.

@gogohm I would like to do this- but she claims to be starving hungry when she gets out of school as her year group each at 11.45 this week ( they take it in turns to use the canteen) other weeks it might work. Maybe dinner must be later

Maybe something with a bit more protein?

She ate 2 thirds of her tea - I don't see any problem with her eating fruit now tbh

Does she take vitamins? I ask because when DD has forgotten to take her vitamin for a week or two, she starts craving high amounts of fruit. So if she doesn’t maybe add that and see if it helps.

Anyway. If she has an after school ceral bar then 5.30 is too early for dinner and you’ll keep finding yourself in this situation. DD doesn’t have a snack after school and we usually eat at 6.30… Boys have bigger appetites so I wouldn’t compare her to your son too much.

Anyway good luck. Feeding kids is such a pain!

I really fancy risotto now…

Fruit is hoaching with sugar so I’d be trying to alternate it with carrot batons or something veggie she likes.

Maybe some carrot, celery, sweetcorn to snack on in place of fruit? Lots of fruit is better than sugar or fat based snacks but not very balanced.

Or some plain low sugar yoghurt. Skyr is high in protein.

Fruit is over-rated. It is full of sugar, and the more acidic types are not good for teeth.
I honestly don't know why 'fruit and vegetables' are always lumped together, as they are very different nutritionally. Vegetables are way, way better for you and more important than fruit.

Make sure she is getting enough protein to fill her up. What was the protein in the risotto?
It doesn't have to be meat. Google 'vegetarian protein'.

Don't get too hung up about meals and food generally.
I think if they sit at the table and take part in the family meal that's great.
We have fruit, toast and crackers freely available at any time.

If she regularly doesn’t eat the whole meal then surely smaller portions are the way to go to stop waste?

If you want to limit her fruit intake then put her days allowance into one fruit bowl and when it’s gone it’s gone.

Sounds fine to me OP- she had a dinner and claimed not to be hungry, you’ve given her other options- nothing else to be said.