Aibu to refuse dd fruit?

[Paperyfish]

Dd (9) adores fruit. She doesn’t have much of an appetite for savoury stuff though. Today she had a cereal bar after school before art club then risotto at 5.30. I believe it to be a reasonable size portion - her 7 yo brother ate the lot. As usual she scraped about a third of it in the bin claiming not to be hungry.I said if she bins her dinner there won’t be any late night snacks as I’m sick of wasting food. I let her have the planned dessert (melon)as I always planned to serve it and I don’t want to make dessert in to a reward. Anyway, now she is after an apple, more melon, some raisins…and I’ve said no. Aibu? I have offered some of the left over risotto or some shredded wheat or a plain yogurt ( as I worried she was honestly hungry)which have been turned down. She just wants fruit. I know fruit is healthy and all… but she needs balance and wastes other foods. I feel mean denying her fruit though.

I personally never say no to fruit even if they don’t eat much dinner.

I would let her have some fruit, silly not to. Children go through all kinds of food fads when young. It's not a forever thing. I hate food waste, so no scraping things in the bin, feed the birds instead.

I would have put her dinner in the fridge rather than the bin so as to eat later if not finished. Food wastage is horrible. So wouldnt be giving her fruit but would next time say dinners dinner and if shes full now fair enough but it can be eaten later if she gets hungry.

I eat fruit every morning for breakfast and I'm
Never hungry before lunchtime so I'm not convinced that fruit doesn't fill you up.

I have a handful of raw oats over chopped fruit and it's seriously yum. That might make a more substantial snack/meal for her?

The sugar in whole fruits is accompanied by fibre so that it is not all available to the body and it is not harmful.

Shredded wheat is not better than a piece of fruit.

Fruit is expensive so prob vegetables as well would be a good option - will she have carrots?

Adding something like peanut butter would help to fill her up more if you're worried about that - peanut butter and apple is lush.

Is there any veg she would eat instead?

There some odd food comments on here tonight - risotto not sophisticated, hardly grown up food! Fruit is overrated.

Does she serve her own portions? Maybe it might work for her, I find it can help to encourage them to eat what they serve themselves.

I'd let her have the fruit - it's healthy and she did eat two thirds of her main. Don't battle over a healthy food!

I would let her have fruit, I don’t think it’s worth starting a battle over something healthy and it’s not like shredded wheat offers a lot that fruit doesn’t

@ColdToesMustBeOctober

(you r lucky your children eat risotto! It's quit e a grown up food! I love it, but do find it incredibly filling )

Its rice. It is not a grown up food at all. And the stuff you add is not grown up. Peas, salmon, butternut squash etc. All very very normal stables.

Risotto is a basic meal. Kinda perfect for kids.

I think eating 2/3rds sounds plenty to me. I find with meals like risotto or pasta, it's much easier to get that "fed up with eating this" feeling before you're actually full, as every bite is the same taste and texture, compared to meals where there are different components on a plate (meat, veg or salad, carbs, etc). As a child this was especially the case for me.

However YANBU not to offer a shitload of fruit. I'd say yes to one or two small fruit portions (e.g. one apple and some grapes) and if she's still hungry after that I think some carby options would be better and more filling: bread, crackers, cereal, etc. Or a protein option like nuts or cheese.

I'd just let her get on with it. Couldn't get worked up about fruit.

We had this with fruit. Plates now go in oven or microwave and nothing else to eat until 80% plate is eaten (portions are small). Then they can have max 2 pieces of fruit (we eat dinner quite late)

Risotto is hardly balanced, just carbs..I would let her have the extra fruit

We never insist the kids keep eating if they don't want to. When they've had enough keep for another meal rather than bin it. No limits on fruit but also encourage other snacks with some protein like nuts. Happy to let them graze. No need to make a big deal out of food as long as they're getting enough nutrition.

Yes to fruit but maybe not the raisins as just sugar really. Would encourage more protein so having it with Greek yoghurt perhaps.

@PixieLaLa

Risotto is hardly balanced, just carbs..I would let her have the extra fruit

It is if there's cheese, veg and protein in there

I'd keep her uneaten portion and reheat it for her during the evening. That would be all that's on offer. No bin scraping immediately after the meal. What a waste!

Always offer something else with the fruit maybe. Ie you can have grapes with rice cake and cheese etc.

But there are worse habits than excessive fruit.

So, you don’t want to reward her with food but you’re happy to punish her by withholding it?

I thought we where past the point of force feeding children left overs of a meal they don’t want.

If the portions being served are too big then serve smaller portions. She can always go back for seconds if she wants.

@Paperyfish what do you put in the risotto?
Do you have a protein in it? That might make a difference?

Rule in our house is you can eat as much as you like but that’s all you’re getting.

How a out a compromise with half a chopped apple and some Greek yoghurt?

@PixieLaLa

Risotto is hardly balanced, just carbs..I would let her have the extra fruit

As over one third of your diet is supposed to be made up of starchy food I think risotto is fine, and it’s usually not just a plate of rice.

OP on reflection I think it’s unsurprising that your daughter just wants to eat fruit. Did you know that almost all apes are what are called frugivores? This means that most of their diet is made of fruit. Your daughter is just doing what evolution told her