Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3

Original poster

To ask for recommendations for last ever holiday?

71 replies

holoptions · 14/10/2021 20:28

Posting here for traffic.

My dad has stage 4 cancer, and we've been told this week his life expectancy is reduced now to 6-12 months. Could be more, could be less.

I really just want us to spend as much time as we can as a family, but I feel so overwhelmed with the news I can't think. Can anyone recommend an idea for a week-long break, perhaps for November or Christmas, that won't be too expensive - - and won't be too risky in terms of covid? We're not constrained by school holidays.

My mum also died from cancer last year. She was ill during the peak of the pandemic so we could arrange anything. I really want it to be different this time.

OP posts:

Staryflight445 · 14/10/2021 21:53

Something to bare in mind op, I don’t know if anyone else has mentioned.
But travel insurance is quite tricky when it comes to illness like this. Before you decide where to go officially it’s definitely worth contacting a travel insurance company to see if it’s viable first.

skodadoda · 14/10/2021 21:58

@holoptions

He's very fatigued, and hasn't said he wants to go on a break. I think he'd be up for anything really, that's not too energetic. I want to go to him with some suggestions, but I'm just at a loss

Would something like Centerparcs be suitable?

LifeIsTricky · 14/10/2021 22:00

In a similar situation with my sister. It's no to abroad due to covid and travel insurance, plus she's on oxygen 24/7 now, tube fed, central line for fluids etc so can travel but it's tricky. We are looking into the Lake District. A lovely hotel or cottage that's level access, wood burner, close to Windemere to use her electric wheelchair to walk around the lake (it's flatter there), and take the car to go look at some lovely scenery as walking isn't much of an option.
We also recently did Northumberland coast and that was lovely, and we were thinking of a road trip around Scotland visiting the lochs etc and islands but it just worked out logistically a bit too much. Thinking of you OP. It's so hard, but making memories help.

PoloMintPatty · 14/10/2021 22:02

Can you give a rough idea where you're based? I feel for you OP. A horrible but beautiful trip to plan. It might be helpful so you can get recommendations if places that are realistic and not an 8-9 hour drive for you all. Big hugs

PoloMintPatty · 14/10/2021 22:03

*of

WoolyMammoth55 · 14/10/2021 22:07

I might be way off OP but some of these look lovely for a few nights?
www.theguardian.com/travel/2021/may/08/20-best-uk-britain-hotels-and-inns-to-rest-and-relax
So sorry for your loss and hope you all come through it as best possible.

takenforgrantednana · 14/10/2021 22:07

@holoptions

Posting here for traffic.

My dad has stage 4 cancer, and we've been told this week his life expectancy is reduced now to 6-12 months. Could be more, could be less.

My mum also died from cancer last year. She was ill during the peak of the pandemic so we could arrange anything. I really want it to be different this time.

where did your mum and dad spend their honeymoon? perhaps return to that if possible maybe lucky and even the same hotel?

Chakraleaf · 14/10/2021 22:08

Centre parks just relaxing together?

stonebrambleboy · 14/10/2021 22:10

If you've been told 6 to 12 months I would do it sooner than later.
When my uncle had the same diagnosis just a nice lunch out at the garden centre was all he could manage, but he really enjoyed it. Or a day trip on one of the train journeys ( lovely food and cream teas) like the Orient Express but in the UK. As others have said talk to him about what he wants. Don't put him under any pressure where he feels obliged to have a good time. Fatigue is hideous he may just want his own bed with you around him.

Beachcomber74 · 14/10/2021 22:24

The Cathedral Lodge in the Cathedral grounds in Canterbury is wonderful for respite & gentle break. Open rooms on ground level & nice drive to Broadstairs and Whitstable for sea air. Restful being in the Cathedral gardens & having it to yourself before usual opening times.

AlanisMorningShed · 14/10/2021 22:30

Sorry to hear the sad news about your Dad.

What scenery does he like, what would relax him?

How about a UK beach apartment/cottage?

There's something relaxing about sitting wrapped up warm at the window watching the waves, I don't know if that'd be your Dad's thing?

I can try and recommend a few if so, just dm me.

Everythingstaken · 14/10/2021 22:38

I’m so sorry op, this is such a heartbreaking situation to find yourself in and my heart goes out to you. Pps have given some wonderful advice. I wondered if your dad has anything he’s always wanted to do but never got round to doing? Whether that be visiting a place, or doing an activity/experience. For example my parents have always said they’d love to go in a hot air ballon (pre Covid they flew over their village frequently) you’ve inspired me to look into booking that for them now!
I wish you all the best and hope you make some wonderful memories together x

Horriblewoman · 14/10/2021 22:41

This maybe really inappropriate but I'd look for a way to see.the northern lights.

tootootaataa · 14/10/2021 22:57

Seahorses is beautiful.

I am sorry OP and hope you can find something suitable

tootootaataa · 14/10/2021 22:58

Seahorses? Seahouses!
Also Bamburgh.

HollowTalk · 14/10/2021 23:02

If I'm tired and don't feel that well, I just want to sleep in my own bed. Just the thought of all that effort involved in travelling would seem too much and I would just want familiar food and a familiar living space.

Wineat5isfine · 14/10/2021 23:05

So sorry to read this! 💐

What about somewhere on the coast he went as a child?

Or a cabin in the Lake District with a view of the lakes / open fire etc?

Hope you find something that you all enjoy and make some lovely memories x

LizzieMacQueen · 14/10/2021 23:11

Scotland. Fort william perhaps and this

(Jacobite train is in the link)

Helenluvsrob · 14/10/2021 23:12

Hugs x

If he’s really fatigued and getting unwell how about a really luxurious hotel / spa / resort near home ?

The sort where you can stay in , with plenty of heat / log fires. A hot tub if he fancies it , lovely grounds , maybe even a golf buggy to drive round in , and the best food so that if all he can eat is a few spoons up it’s a little bit if deliciousness every time.

But no long journey and not far from his hospital.

Frigginintheriggin · 14/10/2021 23:14

Depends where you live, depends where is reasonably local and a comfortable trip if your dad wants to travel.
Definitely have a conversation.
Sending you strength and comfort, I lost my mum during covid ❤💐

Notjustanymum · 14/10/2021 23:54

When my DParent was dying, we took a canal holiday on the French canal network so the they could sit comfortably and watch the scenery pass by. It was lovely. Hope you find something suitable OP💐 it’s a difficult time...

Flip

1 2 3