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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Can I report abuse anonymously

53 replies

SnitchSeeker · 09/10/2021 22:27

Can I report child abuse anonymously or will they know it's name? The child's mum died earlier this year . His dad is an alcoholic and he spends a lot of time with his mums family

He's between 4-6 not sure tbh

I can hear a lot of screaming from both the child and our neighbour right now. I can hear the child is crying hysterically and screaming. I wouldn't normally say anything but he's started screaming back at his child now. Our house is extremely thick we can't usually hear anything at all

If I call the police will they know it's me? I have to live next to him until he moves out and he will make our life's extremely difficult but this isn't right.

In the time I've written this he's stopped crying so maybe I should just call social services?

OP posts:
Original poster
SnitchSeeker · 09/10/2021 22:29

Me not name

OP posts:
itsutterlyshit · 09/10/2021 22:30

You can report it anonymously to the police. Please do they may be struggling and this will get the help they need if there may be something more serious going on that requires immediate intervention.

You will be asked for your detail just say you'd rather not give them.

AlexaPlayBagpipes · 09/10/2021 22:30

You can report to police and ask to be anonymous

Or use the online form on Nspcc website

You can refer anonymously to social care and provide your details so they can contact you for more information but not tell the neighbour it’s you

Just bear in mind the neighbour will be given any information you share so this may identify you. If you are frightened of repercussions that sounds scary for the child living there

StoneofDestiny · 09/10/2021 22:30

Phone social services in the morning and register your concern.
If you hear the child in distress again and you are too afraid to go round, imagine how the child feels - and phone 999

TurnUpTurnip · 09/10/2021 22:31

You can but that doesn’t mean he won’t guess it’s you. Not a reason not to though.

Original poster
SnitchSeeker · 09/10/2021 22:31

@StoneofDestiny yes that's exactly why I want to report. It's not right. At all

OP posts:
JudgeRindersMinder · 09/10/2021 22:31

Phone the police NOW if you haven’t already- more concerned about getting to a child in need than who’s reporting it-anonymity won’t be an issue

PurpleDaisies · 09/10/2021 22:33

I can hear a lot of screaming from both the child and our neighbour right now. I can hear the child is crying hysterically and screaming.

How on earth is this a dilemma? Ring the police right now.

WorraLiberty · 09/10/2021 22:33

How often does this happen?

As a one-off it could be just a stressed parent, snapping and shouting back.

If that's not what you think it is, then call the police and tell them not to knock at your door. They tend to respect that as they understand it often causes more trouble.

AlexaPlayBagpipes · 09/10/2021 22:47

If it doesn’t sound right please phone the police

If you refer to social it’ll be Monday before anyone looks at the information . The police can visit sooner

Original poster
SnitchSeeker · 09/10/2021 22:47

I'm going to call 999 I think. He's only little and it's late. If it's a 1 off that's for the police to decide.

OP posts:
Fallagain · 09/10/2021 22:49

Well done OP. It’s much better if the police see the situation rather than it being reported the next day.

TheChip · 09/10/2021 22:50

Would 101 not be better? They will still respond fast. Definitely report either way, but I'd think its more a 101 than a 999

AlexaPlayBagpipes · 09/10/2021 22:50

101 for police in this situation

PurpleDaisies · 09/10/2021 22:52

@TheChip

Would 101 not be better? They will still respond fast. Definitely report either way, but I'd think its more a 101 than a 999
999 is for crimes in progress and situations where someone is under threat of violence. How is this not that?
EmeraldShamrock · 09/10/2021 22:54

Are they coming out. Flowers

TheChip · 09/10/2021 22:54

@PurpleDaisies the child is no longer crying and there is no evidence that a crime is actually being committed. Shouting is not a crime

PurpleDaisies · 09/10/2021 22:54

This is from Avon and Somerset police…

101 or 999?
Often when people panic they remember the 999 number and call it. We are here 24/7 365 days a year to help you, but if it’s identified as being a non-emergency then you may have to wait for another operator. We need to free up the 999 lines as there could be a life or death emergency waiting to get through.

Advice for calling 999:

call when it’s an emergency
a crime is in progress
someone suspected of a crime is nearby
when there is danger to life
when violence is being used or threatened
If you don’t need an emergency response, then you should call 101 or use our online reporting form on our website.

This could be to report a crime or to seek advice, for example your car has been stolen, your property has been damaged or you suspect drug use or dealing in your neighbourhood.

CloseYourEyesAndSee · 09/10/2021 22:56

If you hear something happening call police at the time, not social services 2 days later. That applies to anyone reading. Police evidence is so important. Social services can do bog all with an anonymous report several days later. Parents deny, no evidence, close case. Police reports are evidence.

HappyDays40 · 09/10/2021 22:57

You need to think of the welfare of a poor defenceless child above your own.Get a grip and call the police

HollowTalk · 09/10/2021 22:59

I would definitely report this. That poor child.

Original poster
SnitchSeeker · 09/10/2021 23:00

@HappyDays40 if you're going to attack me at least read all my posts. I rang the police they're coming out

OP posts:
Etinox · 09/10/2021 23:04
Flowers Thank you @SnitchSeeker
nimbuscloud · 09/10/2021 23:10

You did the right thing.

MiddleEasternMummy · 09/10/2021 23:14

Did you make it clear you wanted to remain anonymous?
Hope the child is ok . Sad situation.