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Original poster

Have you ever regretted ending a friendship?

48 replies

WomanStanleyWoman · 09/10/2021 17:05

I was flicking through my Facebook memories earlier and spotted a comment from someone who’d blocked me years ago. I found it odd as, when she blocked me, all her comments and likes on my newsfeed automatically disappeared, so I wondered why I could see this one. I clicked her name and sure enough, I’m no longer blocked - although she’s made no attempt at contact.

I’ve no interest in renewing the friendship, but I am curious as to why she suddenly went to the effort of unblocking me years later. It got me thinking, as there are only a few people in life that I’ve actively cut out, and I’ve never regretted that. To me, it takes a lot to do that. There are one or two friendships in my life that I let drift, and that I regret, but I just can’t see wanting to resume relations with someone I actively prevented from getting in touch.

Have you ever dropped a friend and regretted it?

OP posts:
flumpettyflump · 09/10/2021 17:11

Funny I was just thinking about this. I've dropped a lot of friends and I never feel bad or regretful. But I would say that in your case it sounds like it was entirely her issue if she's unblocked you? My DH blocked some friends after his DB died. They hadn't done anything wrong, they just kept posting about their siblings and pics of them all together and he found it quite wrenching.

DontBiteTheBoobThatFeedsYou · 09/10/2021 17:14

She doesn't regret it, she's just nosey.

I've done the same.

And no I haven't regretted it.

the80sweregreat · 09/10/2021 17:15

People dropped off my radar when we moved home a few times( social media wasn't around at that time ) I wasn't too upset as they were not my friends originally and were much wealthier than we were too , so not much in common anyway. The people I regard as friends made an effort to stay in touch and I did with them too.
Someone deleted me on fb when I upset them at work!
My dh and I don't have any mutual friends which is strange amongst most couples I know.
I have people who I know , but not close friends
It's a mixed bag really

Original poster
WomanStanleyWoman · 09/10/2021 17:20

@DontBiteTheBoobThatFeedsYou

She doesn't regret it, she's just nosey.

I've done the same.

And no I haven't regretted it.

Haha - probably Grin

She blocked me because a mutual friend ditched her and I wouldn’t act as go-between. Ironically, by doing so she proved exactly why the mutual friend dropped her!

OP posts:
PyjamaFan · 09/10/2021 17:23

I ended a friendship with a group of people a few years ago, including blocking them on social media.

It was one of those situations where I realised that I was making all the effort. The last straw was seeing photos of the rest if them at a party that I hadn't been invited too, or even told about.

I don't regret it at all and never have.

PyjamaFan · 09/10/2021 17:24

Sigh, spelling mistakes!

of them

invited to

Peardear · 09/10/2021 17:26

She probably doesn’t want to rekindle the friendship, more just wants to have a nosey!

Thelnebriati · 09/10/2021 17:29

Its possible that blocks have a time limit, because either they last two years and then automatically end, or someone who ghosted me has recently unblocked me. Which would be odd.

ISpyCobraKai · 09/10/2021 17:30

No, only done it once and no regrets as she was poisonous

tillytoodles1 · 09/10/2021 17:31

Maybe she has a new phone and forgot to re-block you.

Learningtobeafeministagain · 09/10/2021 17:32

I ditched my best and oldest friend 4 months ago- 30 years of being second in her plans, her not arriving and not making any effort unless she wanted crap off me. When called out on her flakiness she told me how much she was struggling after her dads death 2 years ago but I was dealing with real in depth shitty trauma and she had cancelled her own demand to see me. I never blocked her but I’m concerned about her think about dropping her a text but I won’t as it is all one way -if she wants me - she does the leg work

Workyticket · 09/10/2021 17:33

I've dropped 2 very recently who I'd thought were friends for nearly 20 years.

Both dropped out of coming to my wedding just days before for utterly shit reasons and I was utterly heart broken. I've avoided contact since and left a group chat I was in with them.

However I've realised that neither brought anything special to my life and, although I think about them sometimes I don't think I'll ever have them back in my life.

anicesitdownandshutup · 09/10/2021 17:38

I don't regret ending the friendship but I do regret unfriending her on facebook. It feels like a childish thing to do. I should have just changed privacy settings or something so that she couldn't see my updates. Not that I ever post updates....
I wish that I'd maintained the moral high ground. She fell out with everyone and I kinda wish that I'd left it so that should she ever wish to get in touch she could. Was thinking of her doing Covid as she lives alone. She is incredibly stubborn so chances of her ever getting in touch are slim but it felt very final and I do still have some fond memories of our friendship.

ThePontiacBandit · 09/10/2021 17:43

It’s not a time limit or new phone thing. I’ve had people blocked for years and had new phones. I’d go with the assumption some people are just nosey!

Original poster
WomanStanleyWoman · 09/10/2021 17:47

@tillytoodles1

Maybe she has a new phone and forgot to re-block you.
A new phone wouldn’t affect her Facebook account.

I think those saying she was probably hoping for a bit of a nosey are right.

OP posts:
Britneyb · 09/10/2021 17:54

I’ve never regretted dropping a friend but it took a lot to block her. Some people are a bit more free and easy with blocking an unblocking though. I have unblocked people with a shared history to see old posts from mutual friends because I like seeing the memories so it may be that. I don’t like having a long block list either because privacy settings are good now I don’t need to keep them all blocked and having people on that list just reminds me of them.

mumda · 09/10/2021 18:27

I ended up getting rid of someone from my life. She had been really two faced and quite outrageously nasty. Apparently there are some people who stuck with her. I assume because they saw how well she can ostracize people and didn't fancy it happening to them.
I get approached on a regular basis by people who want to bitch about her though. I don't want anything to do with them either though.

I have plenty of friends still and know cutting out two faced twits is the right thing to do

Lindaloo08 · 09/10/2021 18:27

Had a friend who blocked me for no reason a few years after moving to another country. Like others I realised how little she did for me. She contacted me about 2 years ago apologising for treating me so badly and wanting to reconnect. Told me all the problems she had going on in the message and i knew i was being reconnected with as a counsellor again. I replied to her not overly friendly but not rude and she never bothered replying. I knew it was a drunk reach out so after waiting a couple of months for reply I blocked her and no regrets.

Jmaxx44 · 09/10/2021 18:33

I dropped a friend a couple of years ago, she was very jealous of my other friendships and very passive aggressive. She would try to come between me and other friends and could be very manipulative. I do miss her because negatives aside she was great fun and we had a lot of similar interests. She always made a lot of time for me and we enjoyed lots of days out etc together. But unfortunately the negatives still outweigh the positives and I wouldn’t consider renewing the friendship. I definitely made the right decision!

Xyzzzzz · 09/10/2021 18:35

I’ve only ever ended one friendship. Was the right thing to do from my perspective. Other friendships I’ve just left drift.

the80sweregreat · 09/10/2021 20:00

My friend of 35 years nearly fell out with me over one comment
She has often made comments about me and my life and I'm meant to ' understand'

Friendship can be hard

Robotcustard · 09/10/2021 20:20

Yes, in fact I just messaged her this morning saying I regretted us falling out and could I talk to her again. We fell out a year ago and while I was initially quite angry and upset, I’ve moved on from feeling that way and realised I missed the friendship and it was making me miserable seeing her most days and not talking.

Mol1628 · 09/10/2021 20:26

Yes my friend I was close to in high school. She got way to controlling and clingy and the relationship was just hard work. 8 years of friendship and I just told her I had had enough one day. I don’t regret it. It’s a shame it happened but it had to happen really. We had some great times together.

romdowa · 09/10/2021 20:34

I distanced myself from a few people over the years and I only ever regretted one of them. We never had cross words or anything. I was quite ill at the time and just stopped communication. I reached out a few years back and never got a reply. I used to dream about her for years and years but once I sent that message then the dreams stopped.

Cryalot2 · 09/10/2021 20:42

I dropped a friend not on social media but I will always regret not patching it up .
Sadly its too late now.