My just turned 3 year old can read and write

[Rockean]

This isn’t a brag post, although. I’m pretty sure it’s going to come across like one.

My son just turned 3 and he can write his name, write basic/familiar words that he can sound out (the letters are recognisable) and he can sound out words when we look at books together. He loves playing with his magnetic letters and puts them together to create words, he can tell me what they say too.

He’s taught himself this through watching Alphablocks and reading books with us since he was tiny, particularly a phonics book that had all the sounds and alphabet written out with pictures of each letter of the alphabet next to them,

I’m just wondering if this is unusual?

He also doesn’t really play with toys, even though he has plenty of them, he'd much rather look at books and line up his alphabet letters or make words out of them. He’ll also sit with his magma doodle or white board and pen and just write things out. He’s done it at soft play when other kids are playing and I’ve bought his magma doodle.
I want him to play with toys too and I try to encourage him, but obviously I don’t want to discourage him from the books/letters and phonic sounds , but equally he’s going to know much more than most of his peers when he starts school, so I’m worried it’ll be boring for him.

I’m a retired teacher. He sounds like he is learning at a quick pace. However, please don’t think he will be “bored” when he starts school. That attitude is so tiresome. There will be other children who arrive at school able to read and write. If you put that idea into his head, he will complain about being “bored”.

I should add that a good teacher will have plenty of open-ended activities where he can read and write at his own level/pace. Education is more that rote activities and worksheets now.

My sociable, affectionate, sensory sensitive autistic eldest could do this at 3. She learnt to read and write from a leapster video game that she loves. She skipped a year at school and is now at Oxford university.

And she was extremely bored at school until she moved up. We didn’t give her that idea. She told the Ed psych who assessed her after school realised she was academically capable.

Not really. My 3rd child is different but that was all stuff my other two could do then. I was a SAHM and did lots of things with my first and second children though, but with my third I had very bad PND and became disengaged from him for a long time.

My now 7yo could write 1-20 from memory then and recognise large digit numbers (he picked that up off the tele). He's still very good at maths now actually. There's a chance he's a masking autistic because of his epilepsy and sensory differences (amongst a few other things) but nobody has quite figured it out yet.

I was like this and I was, by all accounts, a "normal" child with very few signs pointing toward neurodivergency. Certainly nothing that raised flags in the 90s. I made friends, held eye contact and was appropriately affectionate. I was very bright and high achieving but completely flamed out in secondary school.

I have recently been diagnosed with ASD and ADHD.

My DS fits this description. He was never bored he teaches himself. Diagnosed with Aspergers at 16.

My parents never pushed me or even took much of an interest in my education but I had taught myself to read by age 4. My grandmother did not believe this when my aunt reported it and she believed I had just memorised my own books. She bought an early reader and presented it to me sight unseen on my next visit. I can vividly remember the book. It was a story about a little boy having a dream and walking through a forest which was full of fierce animals. Apparently I read the entire book - requiring help only with one or two harder words, and my grandmother was amazed.

All though school I was ahead of my class in reading, writing and academic subjects (although average in other more practical ones like science, cookery and needlework). I did later catch up on the more practical skills and am now an accomplished sewer although I was never interested in cookery or housework.

I am someone who likes to do one task at a time and concentrate fully upon it. If anyone interrupts me I can get very angry and aggressive with them. All my life I have preferred to learn and work alone and dislike doing things in teams and groups. I loathe sport and am completely useless at it.

I have now come to the conclusion that I am "on the spectrum".

Is this the little fella who will only watch David Attenborough documentaries instead of Peppa Pig?

Just kidding. He sounds like a clever sausage!

Noone else?

RussianSpy101

You didn’t know about autism 15 years ago? Really?

Yes really. Or rather, we had heard of autism, and were vaguely aware of what were the 'known' symptoms at the time, which were basically how autism affected boys. In fact, at that time, autism was definitely regarded as a predominently male thing. We had no idea that DD might be autistic. There were several things that we thought not right, noticable from before she was 2, but the professionals involved with her (health visitor, pre school, teachers etc) just kept telling us she was fine. Meanwhile, we had such difficulties we eventually had to pull her out of primary school and home educate. It was only at the home ed groups that other parents suggested we look up autism in girls. It was a revlation. I honestly don't believe there was the general awareness of autism 15 or even 10 years ago that there is now. At least, not in any circles I moved in, and I dont think we were unusually ignorant. And even though it's now 5 years or so since DDs official diagnosis, there are still things that crop up, like with hyperlexia today, which I had never heard of, and which noone had ever commented on before (apart from to say things like "ooh isn't she bright"). For me, it's another piece of jigsaw found and another example of the helpfulness and learning power of Mumsnet.

I also can’t believe the pre-school had never had a child who could read. Ever. Maybe look around some other settings?

I can only go on what the preschool told me. They were very pleased to show me the set of phonics books they had bought for her use, and said they had never needed them before because they had never had anyone in that could read. The staff had all been there for many years. Decades, some of them. I thanked them and let them and DD get on with it. I don't really need to look at other pre-school settings though, as DD is now 15

It’s unusual, but his interests are to be encouraged, whatever they are. It sounds like hyperlexia.

Check his language, check his understanding even if you think it’s fine, just to make sure he is understanding language ok or whether he needs help with it.

Reading longer words is unusual for a 3 year old but there is more to reading than sounding out and recognising words. Does your son understand what he has read, can he answer simple questions, can he predict and talk about the story, can he think of rhyming words, words beginning with the same sounds Etc? These are all areas you can encourage.
If you find that he is not interested in play and would like to encourage this , google Schemas and Cathy Nutbrown . This will give you ideas how your observations of his actions in one play situation can be transferred to another activity with other toys and resources. Hopefully this will encourage a wider range of play. It is a fascinating area and can be really useful if you want to encourage specific skills.
Also if he finds loud sounds challenging you might consider getting some headphones when you go to noisy places to minimise these. Does he like messy play - using materials such as gloop , jelly and shaving foam can be fun for many children as a more sensory activity.
It’s a great age range and I hope you enjoy all those play moments.
(Apologies if this comes up 2x , I thought I had previewed this already but it then disappeared so the first message may well be somewhere here ).

Why do you want him to do things that he doesn't appear to enjoy and discourage him from things he does enjoy? That's a genuine question.

I'm autistic. He might be. He might not be. But if he's happy playing in his own way, I don't see why you would want to change him?

My 18 year old could read before he could talk, he is autistic. He could also do complex puzzles. He is studying maths at uni. His brother could also read before he could speak, and had a reading age of 16 when tested at 11, he is also autistic and attends a specialist school for autistic children.

There is a book from the 70s, 'Young Fluent Readers' by Margaret M. Clark, which I think is still of interest. It's out of print, but should be obtainable second hand.

Sounds like he's doing really well. Makes life easier for you that he has the interest there. At my sons school they warned us against trying to get our kids steaming ahead because they said they're doing a lot of work to get strong foundations and understanding in place before they start reading and writing. So just be mindful I guess that school may want him to start from scratch again.

My 18 year old was also assessed by an educational psychologist when I was fighting for his EHCP, and was found to have a spiky profile, extremely able in some areas, but below average in others. I strongly recommend you get your ds assessed op.

Hyperlexia can be a sign of autism.

It can, if decoding the words is much better than comprehension. Just being an early reader is not usually a sign of autism in itself,

Oh yes, and my daughter could also read, knew her timetable, and understood algebra before reception. She's a typical 12 year old now, and not brighter than other kids, also definitely not autistic.

My DS4 was talking in full conversations at 1.5 and we didn't do much with him though he knew the alphabet sounds. At 3 he started asking me in depth about the shops we were going in to and I realised that he was reading and recognising the more basic shop names. He loved small world play and very (probably overly) sociable. However his motor skills were pretty poor, he could dress himself at 2.5 but mostly because I was pregnant and very strict on it. He would have me do everything for him if he could get away with it. School has definitely not been boring for him, they are slower with letters which I know he already knows but so quick with numbers which he loves. Also learning how to go about their day without mummy on hand is such a big thing for them.

DS1 is much slower to talk, he would be verging on speech delayed but so much better coordinated than my eldest. I was amazed when at 18m after a bath he came through with his pjs on. He wants to do everything himself and his playing is a lot more throwing stuff around and mischievous. Much less social able but very funny. Loves drawing whereas eldest could barely hold a pen until 3. Having some trouble with him as S&LT suggest giving him the opportunity to talk by not opening bottles or snack for him...v difficult when he just runs off and works out how to do it himself! Just to show they are all different and focus on things like zipping up jackets and getting shoes on and opening crisps for school if he's got the reading down.

My just turned 3 year old does this, he's obsessed with letters, reading & writing. He will see a word written for a split second and then spend hours rewriting it, only difference is he doesn't talk yet, we're currently under speech and language for support, he's autistic.

My 4 and 2.5 year old are both hyperlexic, and both have footnoted autism. A few things stand out in your posts so I think it might be worth speaking to the health visitor about maybe getting a referral.

Can I just point out though that your stereotypes about autistic people are not on. Between them, my two male lots of eye contact and are very affectionate and empathetic

• diagnosed, not footnoted 😬

If you're interested in books and reading yourself, then it's bound to rub off on your children. I started school at 4 yrs old in the 50s and I could already read quite well. My own children could read before they started school at 4. It's not really a sign of a particularly clever child. Most children could read at 3 or 4 if they are significantly exposed to it. In current times it's less likely that parents share books with their children. On a long train journey I would have planned a book for us to read together. Now, on trains, I see mum with her face stuck in her phone and the kids causing chaos around her. These children are slow to learn and end end up with parents who say they must be on the autistic spectrum.

They have really no idea that they are shit parents