To hate online parents' evenings.

[Hcolhcsra]

DD's school and the one where I work are both sticking to online parents' evenings. I loathe them, both as a teacher and as a parent. Too many issues with connections, countdown timers adding pressure and a general lack of connection.

Am I really in a minority?

I have primary aged children and I really missed being able to see their work last year. My son was in year R and I would have loved to have been able to flick through his books and seen what he had done in his first year old school. Fingers crossed face to face comes back this year.

I’m a teacher and they’re brilliant for me as I am hearing impaired. The previous face to face was very stressful as I could barely hear and the tinnitus afterwards was horrible. Plus it cuts out all the ‘chit chat’ and you get to the point. Sometimes I get cut off, but if it was an important matter, I would speak to the parents separately anyway.

They are good for efficiency, but a friend had a teacher really rip into their teenage DC for not working hard enough, and because it was online they couldn't see that the DC was actually crying, so they carried on with an extended character assassination. In person they would have noticed the upset they were causing and toned it down. In person gives you that extra connection that is especially good if negative feed back is being given.

@HungryHippo11

I dislike them, luckily our school is doing mix and match. The teacher either meets you in person in the classroom, or Teams calls you from the classroom, so its possible to do whatever the parents prefer.

This seems like the worst option to me! But the again, I’m a teacher and not a parent.

I must admit I like them. Due to work we always book a later evening and despite many reminders we end up having to wait ages for to previous parents over running. Our junior school did an email questionnaire and it was a mixed response so moving forward they are offering both, you simply book either f2f or online.

Love them.

No more sitting in the hall with 30 other teachers and 200 students each with 2 parents and 3 siblings all running around so that you can’t hold proper conversation anyway.
No more running for hours after closing because some parents can’t stop talking after their 5 minute slot.
No more waiting around at school from 6:30-7:30 for that parent who insisted they needed that 7:30pm last slot for them to not turn up.

Much prefer doing it from home where I can make a quick drink or nip to the toilet between appointments.

I've only had one online one for DS2, but had all the years of F2F with DS1 and online was SO much easier.

They had some brilliant algorithm which made all the appointments for you when you told it your start time.

No travel, no waiting around in sweaty school halls, it kept to time.

@RacoonRocket your friend shouldn’t have allowed the teenager to listen into the conversation, it should solely be between parent and teacher. It wasn’t the teacher’s fault the teen got upset.

I LOVE them. But we’ve had no tech problems and my kids’ progress doesn’t need much discussion.

I only went to one as DSS was in Y13 last year.

They're well organised, in that each person is given a 5 minute time slot and then it automatically switches at the end of the 5 minutes to the next appointment.

Unfortunately we got no information about DSS's progress whatsoever, because the connection kept cutting out, and there was no leeway for extra time as it cut us off after the 5 minutes. It was a complete waste of time.

Much better as a working parent. Last year I could pick the 10 min slot and they worked wonderfully to time. Otherwise I’d have been out of work for an hour to do it or needed childcare if evening. the school are trying hybrid this year which I feel could be a mess as there won’t be the same discipline with the slots running to time if some parents are late, over-run etc.

I think they are brill and hope they never return face to face. No towing out on a cold winter's evening to drive half an hour to school, wasting time trying to navigate around a huge school trying to find the right departments. Arriving to find a huge queue, never getting the appointment time you should have, just hopping inbetween teachers when you see a space because your own appointment is long gone. Waiting for parents who drone on and on to finish. No, better the five minutes online of foucused discussion, on time, in the right place with the right teacher in the comfort of your own home; not milling around with hundreds of other people in a confined space which I hate. Doesn't matter if there are gaps between appointments as you can get on with other stuff.

I prefer them for secondary where I don't have to hunt down the teacher when I do t know what they look like, there is more privacy and timings are adhered to.
For primary I think the in person meeting has more value as it's. single teacher and you also get to see class work/the classroom and work that's been put up. Timings aren't great though as people overrun.

I'm surprised how popular they are but can appreciate for some they're a Godsend. As a teacher, I had connection issues on more than half of the calls (meaning I had to phone or email parents - doubling my workload), not to mention the parents who called in their pyjamas, at the swimming pool, from the car. I just didn't feel I had the time to talk to parents as by the time they'd connected I was often on 3 or 4 minutes. I missed the opportunity to chat to other staff between appointments, and to perhaps have a little longer with some parents who were genuinely interested.

As a parent, the ones with DDs' teachers just seemed a bit impersonal. No opportunity to see the classroom or their work. All the small social cues get lost in an online meeting and you're taking away at least some of the non verbal communication. I ended up speaking to them for less than two or three minutes as I didn't want to start a new line of conversation only to be cut off.
Hopefully schools will be able to create some sort of hybrid, at least at primary, so parents have a choice.

Secondary school most definitely easier, primarily I'm 50/50.
My youngest who is now in yr 1 and my yr 2 child I have never seen inside of the classrooms.
Not seen the work that they have done, I find that quite sad.

Primary awful
Secondary the best thing ever invented. The precovid Parents evening lasted nearly 3 hours. Was hours of queuing, stressed parents, bored kids. We used to have a game of rock paper scissors to see who would go.

@Maryann1975

I hate them. But that could be because our 2 schools both decided that 4 minutes was long enough for a parents evening slot. It really isn’t enough! The last lot of secondary appointments, all the teachers were at school and the WiFi went down, so half of the teachers had no connection at all and the others decided just to do their speil and hope I could hear some of it. It was awful. I hate that there is a timer and then it just cuts off half way through what ever it is you are saying. I get that everyone in the hall is not ideal for all the reasons others have mentioned, but I’m really not a fan of online appointments.

Sounds like you're one of the people everyone else is complaining about who runs over their appointment times usually.

Our secondary school has 3 minute appointments (online and it was the same in person) and generally speaking that is enough to get a general view of how they are doing in the subject. If there are issues which need further discussion then you need to book a separate appointment at another time.

Re the timer, you can see it there, so when it gets to 10 seconds you obviously start to wind down what you are saying! I never understand this with Zoom meetings too, some people just completely ignore the thing that has popped up telling you the room will close in 10 seconds, and just keep talking til they get cut off!

@Cattitudes

Yep like them as long as the teacher is familiar with the technology. Live parents evenings never run to time, it is chaotic and noisy (at secondary). The same children who dominate the classroom dominate the parents evening because the teachers need to tell them off in front of their parents or because their parents are as chatty as they are.

Wise words.

I think for lower years maybe they are fine but Ds is now in year 11, we had teachers who couldn't connect and another teacher saying you will have time to ask questions at the end but then they talk for too long and you don't get time to ask what you want and it cuts you off. This is just before November mocks.

They did this last year so for Ds in both year 10 and now year 11 we haven't spoken to his maths or statistics teacher. Not great for us.

I can see the massive upsides to it but for years 10 and 11 I think in person with screens would be far more helpful.

For primary I liked in person meetings - I like being able to talk through the work with the actual books in front of me. See the problems and successes writ large, quite literally!

For secondary last year it was a NIGHTMARE. The school is a rabbit warren and we seemed to be the only Y7 parents who had the common sense to book with gaps between each "appointment" so that we had 5 minutes to find the bloody classroom up a flight of stairs, down a narrow corridor, through the canteen, around the garden 3 times, hop on 1 leg through the tennis court under a full moon and down a secret tunnel to the French department.

Everybody else just missed half their meetings (presumably the more experienced parents also booked gaps).

By the time you found your well-concealed teacher, you were already worrying about the hike back to find the next one.

I passionately wish they'd do it online! But I also see how the orienteering expedition builds greater connection with the school and what our kids are actually doing all day etc.

We're having a 10 minute phone call. Ds1 started in august, I've still not met any of the teachers or seen inside the school. I wouldn't even recognise the head teacher if I passed her in the street

My DD's school does Teams or phone appointments. I hate Teams but don't mind phone appointments. It's definitely less personal - can't read body language or see their expression etc but on the plus side I don't have to leave the house!

I absolutely love them. But then I do have triplets so its the only time in secondary school when I have managed to speak to all their teachers on the night.

Love them and know i can request another appt if issues.

I like them over the phone.

No more being held up for an hour because every parent in front of you wanted to talk for an extra 10 mins.
No worries over childcare as I cam send the kids to their rooms or take call in bedroom rather than them running riot around the school because they are bored.