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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be cross with dd over cake?

46 replies

smartiejake · 07/12/2007 19:07

DD1 (age 11) took a swiss roll to school today to make a chocolate log for food tech. She has a friend round for tea and so does dd2. She agreed to let them all have a piece of the cake for pudding then changed her mind. I said she couldn't change her mind and anyway I paid for the cake and all the ingredients to decorate it. ALso it is huge and will not last very long.
SHe had a huge tantrum, told me I was "out of order " and then said she was going to tell her dad!!!(Who was hiding upstairs on his pc but sometimes does side with her.)I am so cross with her. I entertain and feed her friends enlessly and the one who is here today is also staying for a sleepover tonight!
Was I out of order or should I have let her save the cake as she had decorated it this morning??

OP posts:
belgo · 07/12/2007 19:09

you weren't out of order. you did the right thing.

nutcracker · 07/12/2007 19:09

YANBU, she is being very selfish and childish.

MamaG · 07/12/2007 19:09

yanbu - esp as she'd agreed to it firstly

macdoodle · 07/12/2007 19:09

Save it for what though YANBU

belgo · 07/12/2007 19:09

she should share the cake

coldtits · 07/12/2007 19:09

She was probably upset because she had decorated it, and was proud of it. You were right - it is a cake and meant to be eaten

coldtits · 07/12/2007 19:11

nutcracker, to be fair, she is a child.

belgo · 07/12/2007 19:11

lol at childish

soapbox · 07/12/2007 19:14

I would ban her from sleepovers for a month (or whatever you feel is appropriate).

It is totally disrespectful to behave like that, especially when there are guests in the house!

Original poster
smartiejake · 07/12/2007 19:21

I would have done the ban sleepovers thing but we had already arranged it and it would have made it difficult for her mum to cancel it.

OP posts:
soapbox · 07/12/2007 19:25

Oh agree - you can't send this one home now - but you can ban any more for a while (both having people at your house, and for any she is invited to at her friends' houses)!

hatrick · 07/12/2007 19:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

DeckTheHallsWithHollyhobbie · 07/12/2007 19:28

take a photo of the cake, so that she can remember her decoration, but then make her share it.

nametaken · 07/12/2007 19:32

Smartiejake you did the right thing. I wouldn't ban sleepovers though, you've made your point about the cake and she didn't win did she even though she tried so I personally don't think she has actually done anything to be punished for. Not being allowed to keep the cake aside WAS her punishment.

TinyTimLivesinVictorianSqualor · 07/12/2007 19:35

Why didnt she want them to have any???
I wouldve asked why, and if the answer was reasonable enough said fine, we'll cut it tomorrow and your friend can take some home.

You may have paid for it but it's her cake!

lucyellensmum · 07/12/2007 19:58

Shame - she must have been quite proud of her cake. Not sure what the outcome has been but i have an idea. What about if you take a photo of the cake before it is eaten?

Belgianchox · 07/12/2007 20:10

tantrum at 11? There was I thinking that when dd gets to 3 we might just start coming out of the tantrum phase! YANBU btw, she should share the cake, of course.

Alipop · 05/03/2009 22:01

My 6 year old didnt really do tantrums as a toddler, but boy is she making up for it now! The only thing is she is much stronger and more strong willed now she is 6. I dont know how to handle it - any suggestions?

Alipop · 05/03/2009 22:03

By the way, your right she should share the cake, i think a few weeks on no one for tea would do the trick

LadyGlencoraPalliser · 05/03/2009 22:05

You are not alone. DD1 (11) had a tantrum tonight because she hadpersuaded DD3 (6) to swap her lovely new big box of oil pastels for a small and well used box of of chalk pastels and I made her give them back. Apparently it wasn't fair because she didn't have any oil pastels and she needed them more.
When DH pointed out that she could buy them out of her pocket money (she has about three months worth saved up) she went ballistic.
She is normally quite a nice and thoughtful child.
I blame it on their hormones.

Shitemum · 05/03/2009 22:07

What hatrick and deck said

HairyMuff · 05/03/2009 22:08

Folks this happenned in Dec 07.

LadyGlencoraPalliser · 05/03/2009 22:12

But has she had any cake since? Or any sleepovers?

HairyMuff · 05/03/2009 22:17
Grin
Shitemum · 05/03/2009 22:21

Is this a new form of trolling?
Or a new poster who thought she had to trawl through the archives till she found a similar enough topic to her own dilemma to post on?

Love, you are allowed to start your own thread!