AIBU to start reporting aggressive men?

[ChocolateCoveredRaisins]

I have had 2 runs ins with aggressive men in the past week whilst out driving.

Firstly I want to say that I have never bumped my car or had a driving ticket in the 30 years I have been driving, so I don't think it is me. Also, I go back to my home town quite a lot and I am never beeped, or shouted at by men like I am where I live now.

So, situation 1: I was driving down a residential road looking for a car park space. I came to a parking area and indicated to park in the space well in advance. A man came right up my bumper, literally inches, and I couldn't park so had to drive on. I shrugged as he passed me and he then reversed and wound down his window and started ranting and swearing at me. There is no way this wimp of a man would have done that if I was a man.

Situation 2: I was at a mini-roundabout and the van to the right of me was nowhere it so I went. However, he was going so fast that he didn't even brake as he reached the roundabout and went over the top of it at top speed and only just missed the back of my car and beeped me for about 10 seconds. Baring in mind this was near a school, he could have killed someone crossing the road.

It sounds like I can't drive, but I do not get beeped or shouted at anywhere else. I do think the men where I live are a particularly misogynistic horrible lot.

AIBU to think that women should no longer put up with this shit and from now on start taking reg numbers and reporting it to the police. I think women need to start standing up to these male bullies who now think they can get away with all kinds of shitty behaviour to us, because...well they are getting away with it.

IME the police aren't always the best at gauging what is aggressive or misogynistic, they are not good at these kind of micro-aggressions. So unless the man has damaged your car you'd be wasting your time. The law is much more concerned with property than it is with women feeling safe.

It's certainly not only men! Not where I live anyway

But how could you safely capture the reg in the second scenario?

And who are you going to report them to?

Im not sure the police will do much about a man Beeping at you, and even in the first incident it would be very much your word against his.

Aah yes the 'my car is my penis' scenario. 'Tis very common, OP. I have already taught my dc that a lot of men see their vehicle as an extension of their penis.

I find an effective reaction to those types of behaviours is to smile and sing along to a song on the radio/cd player. Don't get mad, enjoy yourself.

Maybe we should have an aggressive driver data base. Where you put in their registration and a certain number of bad reports on that registration and the person has to do an aggressive drivers course or something?

It’s not acceptable. But what do you expect the police to do if someone swears at you or sounds their horn?

Misogyny and male aggression is so deeply ingrained into our culture, I’m just not sure that it’s something that can be policed away. It’s also a huge issue in the police force, as we are seeing, so don’t think they’re the ones to deal with it. I don’t know what the solution is, but I don’t think reporting rude and aggressive men to the police will make an ounce of difference.

Yes I would. I have actually done this in the past and the police took the time to listen to me about what happened and said they were going to have a chat with this person.

I have also reported an agressive male driver who was stupid enough to misbehave in a car that had his company’s name on it and his manager spoke to me and told me thanks for reporting it, I was one of several people that had called to complain about this persons behavior on the road.

Dash cam front and rear, so you can safely do your driving and let the camera capture al the evidence

From the sounds of it, you were actually at fault at the second scenario as you cut up someone on your right. His speed is a second issue but he does have the right of way. In a collision you would have been at fault.
(My brother court for this exact scenario. Outcome is that you can't use the other cars speed as an excuse for not giving way to the right on a roundabout, ever.)

Try a dash cam?

I suspect you’ll have a hard time being listened to without undeniable proof.

Of course YABU. Even if we had a perfect system, there’s no law against being a cunt. You would just be wasting everyone’s time.

I’m not sure. The last time someone was aggressive to me while I was driving they were female. She called me a cunt even though her kids were in the car 🤐

Yes here it's aggressive females

School run times are a nightmare

as nothing actually happened, I don't think the police would be interested. men are ridiculously aggressive behind the steering wheel. first thing they reach for when anything they don't like is the horn. my understanding is that the the horn is there to signal your presence - not to tell the other driver off!

I've had this, with my two daughters in the car. It's a stupid and dangerous junction but you have to stick to the left hand side if going straight over at the junction. If turning right you stick to the right hand side. This man decides this doesn't work for him so he goes straight over on the right hand side. He pulled over in front of me, gets out of his car and starts shouting at me. I did say, fuck of cunt after pointing out he was in the wrong. No way would he have done that if I were male.

Yes report them, as it builds up a log. Don't expect any action from the police about your complaint though.

Men get beeped at to you know. Women also use their horn.
Some drivers are horrible, some people are horrible. It's not a case of all men are aggressive drivers and all women are perfect drivers.
I guess you can report them if you want but what do you expect the police to actually do? No crime has been committed and if they spoke to every bad/aggressive driver they'd never have time for anything else.

Report to who?

Funnily enough as a learner driver I get beeped at /let through by both men and women but the worst was a woman with a big van. Cut across me although it was my right of way

@Rosebel

Men get beeped at to you know. Women also use their horn. Some drivers are horrible, some people are horrible. It's not a case of all men are aggressive drivers and all women are perfect drivers. I guess you can report them if you want but what do you expect the police to actually do? No crime has been committed and if they spoke to every bad/aggressive driver they'd never have time for anything else.

Here is the namalt.

A man shouted at me and my son for a parking offence outside school. I was totally in the wrong, had only been a few minutes was running back to the car and apologising. He still ranted and raved and swore in front of children. I went from feeling apologetic to feeling he was in the wrong (he was also parked illegally). I felt very much he wouldn't have behaved that way if I were male.

Your post makes me think...

Maybe I am just very touchy this week after everything that has happened in the news.

I am just sick of men. There are some nice ones, but I very much think they are in the minority.

There’sa lot of aggressive driving lately particularly in the south east with all the petrol station waiting times. White van men seem to be particularly aggrieved by the pressure. Yes I would report them all.

There is no way this wimp of a man would have done that if I was a man.

Because men are never the victims in road rage incidents?

Maybe we should have an aggressive driver data base. Where you put in their registration and a certain number of bad reports on that registration and the person has to do an aggressive drivers course or something?

That would be SO open to abuse.