.. to think that the 'toppers ' in your life are a drain ..

[the80sweregreat]

.. not talking about pizza toppings , but people who have to go ' one up ' on anything you've said or done?
I know a few and if you've done it , read it or seen it they have too , only better !
If it's a one off I can deal with it, but generally it is everything and it also obvious some of it is slightly made up too?
I think that often it's attention seeking or comes from a sense of insecurity , but many just do it because they can ?

I think most people are just actually sharing their experiences and sometimes other people (particularly chip on shoulder types) interpret this as competitive.

Are you a tippy topper from Elevenerife @HarebrightCedarmoon? 😆

My DM is a topper. Whenever I speak to her about something wonderful that my teenage ASD DS has achieved at school I get the blow by blow account about how her one and only granddaughter has done so much better than him ( she's 5 years younger)!

I work with Mrs Eleveneriefe. She has always already done it, or done it better, or passes off ideas as her own. I call her out on it every single time. She doesn't talk to me anymore

Such folk always tempt me to invent something quite preposterous to see what they do to ‘top’ it.

I used to do this! I was completely unaware that I did it until a colleague pointed it out 😳 Since then I’ve stopped doing it but noticed that it is a real thing in my family (especially mum). When I was growing up that’s just what conversations at home were like and I thought that was what conversation was.

My husband said he worked with a chap like this - whatever you had done he'd done it bigger / better / more extravagantly. He was known as Harpic because he drove everybody clean round the bend

Me exBF had one, nicknamed him "Danny" Two Shits. He said it was because "If you'd had a poo that morning "Danny" would have done 2... and they would have been bigger than yours!"

I can deal with them if it's someone I don't have to see often but I'd avoid making friends with people like this, it's exhausting!

@DollyDinkle

I call them "two shits" because if you've had one shit, they will have had two.

Ooh are you my ex? Ha ha!

The other form this takes, is people who say - after the fact - 'oh, I did notice XYZ but didn't like to say'...when you've missed something/misjudged something/whatever - to paint themselves in a better light.

I always want to (and sometimes do) snap 'well, why didn't you say anything then?!', suspecting that they thought nothing of the sort but think it makes them look good.

In fact, they drop in my estimation - if you noticed something and kept quiet, then keep on keeping quiet when the consequence follows! 👿