AIBU to not eat if I’m not hungry?

[2lsinllama]

I had a smoothie for breakfast and a pasta pot for lunch, plus a banana. Got tea for DH and DS, but didn’t feel hungry so didn’t eat. DH is now trying to get me to eat, saying I’ll be ill if I don’t. I’ve had plenty of water and I don’t feel headachy or faint or anything. I’m due on any day, feel bloated and just not hungry. Why do we eat when we don’t feel the need, just because it’s meal time?

Not unreasonable at all

Is this a one off? Are you a healthy weight?

Are you underweight or healthy?

It depends. Do you have a history of disordered eating? So often on these threads an OP will post a little snapshot like this about an eating habit to get reassurance about a behaviour that in isolation is fine, but with proper knowledge of the context is not.

It depends - that's not a lot of food.

What's your relationship with food like in general? Does your DH have a good reason to be concerned?

You have barely eaten today and if that's normal for you it's no sure your DH is concerned. As a one off it's probably not anything to worry about, but if that's an example of your usual day, you need to speak to someone

It's no WONDER your DH is concerned

I’d need to hear the other side of the story tbh.

It does sound like you want everyone to rush in and validate your limited eating/skipping meals, and since this is Mumsnet, I’m sure lots of posters will oblige

Agree it's ok as a one off, especially if you have something reasonably healthy you could eat later if you feel hungry. Not ok if you do this regularly due to an eating disorder.

No one here can tell you based on one paragraph.

I’m overweight, but not actively dieting. I don’t normally not feel like eating but I’m genuinely not hungry. I stood in the kitchen and looked and didn’t fancy any of it. DH is very much of the school of ‘it’s six pm so we must have dinner’ and I think that’s bothering him more than me not eating if you see what I mean.

Just to add I do think it's ok to intermittent fast and do 1 or 2 meals a day but only if you eat a sensible amount in those meals and make sure you get all the nutrients you need and don't take it to extremes.

It happens sometimes. But if you're anything like my partner, who could happily go a day without food, then your DH is right to be worried.

I felt like this for a few days before I got covid. But in general, yeah, only eat when you're hungry, that works!
You may be hungry later, then you can eat something.

Meh, if it's a one-off then it's no big deal.

I often have no appetite if I'm tired or under the weather.

I more than make up for it on other days though

Absolutely don’t eat if you’re not hungry, why would you?

I get super bloated around my period and often don’t feel hungry.

I get so stressed that I just can't be arsed to eat. Its just extra stimulation that I don't need. Just make sure you eat when you do fancy it and take plenty of vitamins.

I do agree that you should only eat when you're hungry, but if it's a habit and makes you ill in itself then that's another thing. But for most people (including myself) it will be a one off and is ok. Just worth keeping an eye on.

I’m not sure about this. There’s something nice about sitting down together with dh snd having dinner together in the evening. I might have a smaller portion if I wasn’t particularly hungry but I wouldn’t not eat dinner. I’d have to be feeling pretty unwell not to want to eat. Usually if I skip a meal I end up snacking on junk anyway.

Eating when not hungry and just eating by the clock is why a lot of people are overweight surely?

If you regularly only eat what you've listed that's an ED. But, not enough info to know.

I've stopped eating by the clock and it's so liberating. I eat when I'm hungry.

I don’t get the set meal time thing. I generally don’t eat breakfast, unless I happen to fancy it. I love a good lunch (unless I’ve eaten breakfast, then not so much) and I’m more than happy to skip dinner, eat a light dinner or have something full depending on what I’ve eaten that day. I’m a size 10/12, no history of disordered eating. I just don’t understand eating for the sake of eating because it’s dictated we eat at certain times.

@CovidDoesNotExistDuh

Eating when not hungry and just eating by the clock is why a lot of people are overweight surely?

If you regularly only eat what you've listed that's an ED. But, not enough info to know.

I've stopped eating by the clock and it's so liberating. I eat when I'm hungry.

This is sort of what I meant in the OP - why do people eat if they are not hungry just because it’s ‘dinner time’? And I’m sure this is just a one off 😂

^This is sort of what I meant in the OP - why do people eat if they are not hungry just because it’s ‘dinner time’?*

Because practically it makes sense for a family to eat at the same time. It’s much easier to plan your evening if you know when you’re eating.

Sometimes I do this. I still make the meal, and then just put it in the fridge for later. If I'm hungry later I go back to it, otherwise I have it for lunch the next day. I have mostly stopped eating when I'm not hungry (still occasionally stress eat/emotionally eat sometimes) and try not to over eat. I have lost 2 stones that way when all other dieting methods failed. I basically 5-2 or 16-8 quite often but I never set out to intermittent fast I just follow when my bodies hungry. I do eat chocolate nearly every day but also lots of fruit, veg, lean protein, complex carbs and probiotic foods.

Throughout my life whenever I try and eat when other people eat I overeat. And when I'm left to my own devices I only eat 2x a day most days.

I know what you mean - it is weird, isn't it!?

I'm on some medication which completely obliterates my appetite, and I'm finding myself eating at weird times just because that's when I'm actually hungry. DH is so uncomfortable with it, like you say, because it's 'lunchtime' and I'm not hungry - he's not pecking at me about it, but you can see his brain scrambling like "BUT IT IS THE TIME WE EAT FOOD????" hahahaha.