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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I'm livid.....

84 replies

beautifullymad · 27/09/2021 18:07

My youngest son has covid. It transpired that a fellow class mate said his whole family had covid but he didn't have to isolate (he doesn't as he's under 18)

He then proceeded to laugh and joke that he would give them all covid by coughing on them. He coughed repeatedly on my youngest (year 11) and now, he's gone down with covid. We are a CEV household and my elderly mother took them all out yesterday. She's also CEV.

I'm furious. My son wears a mask, he avoids people because he knows the risks at home. For this classmate to laugh at him and purposely cough on him knowing his whole family were covid positive is disgusting.

I am so mad I want to report this as assault. If the young person had been over 18 it may well be classed as assault. Aaaagghhhh .

OP posts:
DdraigGoch · 27/09/2021 19:35

I am so mad I want to report this as assault. If the young person had been over 18 it may well be classed as assault. Aaaagghhhh .
I'd definitely go ahead and report it.

Workinghardeveryday · 27/09/2021 19:36

Our school also sent an email advising coughing on other pupils could end in expulsion

HarrietSchulenberg · 27/09/2021 19:42

Check if your son's school had an amended behaviour policy to include covid regulations and, if it did, use that to make a complaint. Whether your son caught covid from this boy or not is irrelevant; the other boy clearly intended to infect everyone and needs a consequence.

JasonMomoasgirlfriend · 27/09/2021 19:46

For this classmate to laugh at him and purposely cough on him

Well laughing isn't a crime it just sounds like stupid teen behaviour 🤷
And the "coughing on" could be exaggerated by your son maybe?

Suzi888 · 27/09/2021 19:47

Why didn’t they test their child? If they have symptoms they should be tested and he shouldn’t have been in school if he was positive.

YANBU and I would contact the school.

User5827372728 · 27/09/2021 19:52

@HugeAckmansWife

Well as a fellow teacher I’d like the think that if this was occurring during my lesson I would notice and respond accordingly

HugeAckmansWife · 27/09/2021 20:18

Yes of course but it's going to be after the fact isn't it? We have an enhanced behaviour policy around Covid safe behaviour and all the rest of it but if you or anyone else thinks that teachers can prevent a student choosing in a moment to do something like this, an action which takes seconds, you're kidding yourself. You can prevent a repeat, you can punish, you can warn but in that moment, what could you actually do?

User5827372728 · 27/09/2021 20:27

@HugeAckmansWife

Well I would ensure the kids was removed from lessons and placed into the exclusion room for at least the day and would inform the victims that this has been done. I would also call that kids parents/carers and explain what happened.

I would then speak to SLT about a fixed term exclusion, and then push this if it wasn’t agreed.

HugeAckmansWife · 27/09/2021 21:39

Yes sure. But none of that would undo the actual event happening would it? You asked where the teacher was. They could have been stood right next o them but unless they threw themselves bodily in front of the cough, Bodyguard style, they couldn't prevent the droplets reaching the OPs son.

thebear1 · 27/09/2021 22:24

Absolutely speak to the school but the police seems over the top. It would not get taken to court as can't prove, it's done by a juvenile and what exactly can they do?

Barnybrown · 27/09/2021 22:36

Has your son been vaccinated ? If so hopefully that will reduce transmissibility. Unfortunately I do think children are going to catch Covid now and that is just inevitable unfortunately. Teenagers do stupid things and I am not a big fan of criminalising their stupidity. Hope your son recovers quickly and if anyone else in your family does contract Covid that they aren’t too poorly with it.

Blankblankblank · 29/09/2021 10:28

@beautifullymad so awful.
We are also a CEV household so I totally understand your worry & anger, shocking that a 15/16 year old did this. That isn’t just stupidity, police have already said that coughing on people would be classed as assault, & a 15 year old is old enough to understand he was putting people at risk.
Have you spoken to the school?
I hope the rest of your family are able to stay Covid free & DS doesn’t become too unwell Flowers

Original poster
beautifullymad · 01/10/2021 07:57

@Barnybrown

Has your son been vaccinated ? If so hopefully that will reduce transmissibility. Unfortunately I do think children are going to catch Covid now and that is just inevitable unfortunately. Teenagers do stupid things and I am not a big fan of criminalising their stupidity. Hope your son recovers quickly and if anyone else in your family does contract Covid that they aren’t too poorly with it.
No, he's 15 and they haven't started vaccinating this age group in our area. Had a positive pcr test back so he's most definitely infectious.
OP posts:
Vallmo47 · 01/10/2021 08:01

So sorry Op. Tons of kids running around in both primary and secondary claiming they have covid and coughing. It’s not right and I would mention it if I ever bumped into the head teacher wherever she is….
It’s all very frustrating.

Original poster
beautifullymad · 01/10/2021 08:06

[quote Blankblankblank]@beautifullymad so awful.
We are also a CEV household so I totally understand your worry & anger, shocking that a 15/16 year old did this. That isn’t just stupidity, police have already said that coughing on people would be classed as assault, & a 15 year old is old enough to understand he was putting people at risk.
Have you spoken to the school?
I hope the rest of your family are able to stay Covid free & DS doesn’t become too unwell Flowers[/quote]
I agree. I'm still tempted to report this to the police. If he'd been coughed on, purposely with the verbalised threat of 'I'm going to infect you' and this happened outside school, then yes we would report.

The school are taking stern action but aren't telling us more.
So far no one else is testing positive as he isolated the moment he realised he might have it. He's a good kid. But we won't know for another 5 days the damage caused.

Most children won't know they are possibly infectious, he had a slightly blocked nose and felt sleepy. Now he has joint pain. No temperature, no cough, not even a runny nose and cold symptoms.
It can be so mild in children. I'm so glad he's not suffering, that would make things so much harder.

OP posts:
ssd · 01/10/2021 08:09

@Suzi888

Why didn’t they test their child? If they have symptoms they should be tested and he shouldn’t have been in school if he was positive. YANBU and I would contact the school.
Well if the kid is such an arsehole it doesn't bode well his parents have any sense either.
Dntevenknowit · 01/10/2021 08:19

Gosh I’m so shocked by people wanting to criminalise a child for a cough. Yes he’s done something stupid but reporting to police for a stupid act like this at age 15 and lots of mature women calling for this when it could tarnish his life chances wow.

There is 0 proof it came from the child - just you assuming based on that conversation. I also doubt very much your son is wearing a mask and doing all the things you say in lessons as teenagers just aren’t doing this as they don’t want to be different and if he has done it maybe thats what led to this boys silliness thinking your son is over anxious and wanted to take the mick. Teenage boys think weirdly.

Before i’m jumped on, i’m not supporting this boys behaviour but a criminal record for a cough seems crazy.

CanICelebrate · 01/10/2021 08:23

As a mum and teacher of children this age I would be furious to hear this.
Yes inevitable that most children will catch covid at school, but laughing and deliberately coughing over someone is disgusting.
I’d speak to the school and demand action. If he was an adult I’m sure you could call the police about this.

XelaM · 01/10/2021 08:26

Don't have to be over 18 to commit an assault. Age of criminal responsibility is 10

HoppingPavlova · 01/10/2021 08:29

No, he's 15 and they haven't started vaccinating this age group in our area.

I thought that any 12 and above who were CEV themselves or had CEV in household had already had the opportunity to be done, is that not correct?

CanICelebrate · 01/10/2021 08:29

Actually @Dntevenknowit at my school a number of pupils with CEV family members are wearing masks most of the time in school.
I teach in a boys’ school and I would be horrified if this happened.
There can be silliness and banter between some of the boys at my school but what OP described is disgusting and far from normal behaviour.

Boys ‘think weirdly’ isn’t an excuse and it’s a weird thing to say. Boys can also be kind and understanding as to why their peers choose to wear a mask - this has been my experience. The boy who deliberately coughed over someone behaved abnormally and unacceptably.

XelaM · 01/10/2021 08:30

@beautifullymad I'm glad your son has only mild symptoms. My daughter only had a headache and was very tired for 2 days, but thereafter had no symptoms whatsoever

Soontobe60 · 01/10/2021 08:31

Do you know for certain that this boy was contagious?

XelaM · 01/10/2021 08:32

@CanICelebrate I agree. I don't know any boy in real life who would fo something like this. It's not normal at all

Original poster
beautifullymad · 01/10/2021 08:33

@HoppingPavlova

No, he's 15 and they haven't started vaccinating this age group in our area.

I thought that any 12 and above who were CEV themselves or had CEV in household had already had the opportunity to be done, is that not correct?

No, it was households only of the severely immunocompromised, so those taking immunosuppressants after transplants etc. The vast majority of CEV households are sitting ducks with children in schools.
OP posts: